Chapter 13
It was right then.
From the resuscitation room area, a barrage of footsteps started coming this way.
“Move! Move! Everybody move!”
I turned toward the shouting. It was Chief.
“What the fuck is going on! What the fuck! What the fuck! Why is the alarm suddenly going off in B Area! Did someone go into cardiac arrest
(*Cardiac Arrest, cardiac arrest)
?!”
Fourth-year resident Lee Min-jae pushed through us and approached the patient.
Chief checked the patient's condition for a moment, then confirmed the BiPAP machine's settings.
“Hmm….”
Chief stroked his chin for a moment, thinking, then pressed a few buttons on the machine and made a slight adjustment to the settings.
“Increase RR to 16, and FiO2
(*Fraction of Inspired O2, the oxygen concentration in the air the patient inhales)
to 30% as well. That should make him a lot more stable.”
Chief glanced at the ABGA results recorded in the EMR and nodded.
“There we go. Good initial management.”
With a satisfied expression, Chief headed back to the resuscitation room to deal with the trauma patient.
'...He saved them.'
I pretended to head toward the supply room, moved off to a corner, and quietly opened the system window.
A clear popup window appeared in my vision.
[You successfully treated a patient with acute respiratory failure!]
[300 LP have been awarded as a reward.]
My eyes widened.
...Oh, 300 LP? Nice.
***
Night was drawing to a close.
I was slumped in a corner of the station, practically exhausted. One by one, the seniors who had been battling in the resuscitation room came out looking worn out. In the end, the trauma patient survived and was sent up to the operating room.
“Hyunjae, aren't you getting off work?”
Kim Ji-hoon, who had approached without me noticing, looked down at me with hollow eyes.
“Looks like you got your ass handed to you.”
“Go ahead without me. I just need to finish a few more charts.”
“Hey, you'll work yourself to death. Just get it done roughly and go. We still have to prepare for the conference the day after tomorrow.”
“Okay. I'll be there soon.”
I waved him off and sent Kim Ji-hoon away first.
Conference, my ass. I just wanted to dive straight into bed.
I couldn't get any strength into my fingers as they tapped the keyboard.
At last, I finished the last patient's chart and hit the logout button.
“Doctor, I'll head out first.”
I bowed politely to the senior who was keeping watch over the station.
That's so MZ.
“Sure, get going. You worked hard today.”
Yes, yes, understood.
I swallowed the lifeless reply in my head and turned around.
Should I grab a taxi?
No, let's just take the bus.
A taxi this early in the morning is a luxury.
'...But does this open outside the hospital too?'
A thought suddenly crossed my mind.
Like Wi-Fi? Until now, I'd never once thought about opening the Gallery outside the hospital while commuting.
'Gallery.'
Ping-
The familiar blue interface appeared.
It works.
With a sigh of relief, I scanned the Gallery main page. Then I couldn't help but snort.
Title: But doesn't HellSlave1<<< seem like this bastard's skills are seriously lacking?
Author: God of Scalpels
I heard him stitching up that forehead earlier, and it was a total joke. At that level, I almost feel sorry for the patient.
The bone-crushing truth left me speechless for a moment.
These bastards must be monitoring my every move.
I let out a dry laugh and started writing a post.
Title: Hey gallery freaks, I'm clocking out ㅇㅇ
Author: HellJoseonSlave1
Don't look for me.
After I hit the submit button, comment notifications exploded like crazy.
ㅇㅇ (210.94) : Hey!!!!!!! Don't go, fucker!!!!!!!!!
BoneNerd88 : Already getting off work? No one with broken bones even came in today! I haven't seen a single one yet!
PediatricsGhost77 : You bastard!!! A pediatric emergency croup
(*Croup, acute obstructive laryngitis)
patient—you've got to at least see one before you go!!!!
InMyDay : Tsk tsk, you kids are so spoiled. Back in our day, 48 straight hours on duty was standard. That's why kids these days have no grit.
DescendantOfHippocrates: O living one, your rest is a rightful entitlement, yet it is deeply regrettable that our amusement must come to an end.
What a load of bullshit.
I can't die just to entertain you guys.
My eyes, scrolling down, paused at one comment.
ㅇㅇ (118.235) : But don't you need to study? Judging by your level, it looks like you're going to have to work hard.
It was true.
A hundred-percent fact that hit me right in the sore spot.
I froze.
...Is that so?
Now that I thought about it, that made sense.
'Hands are in the realm of talent. If you can't do it, you can't do it.'
A comment flashed through my mind.
If I don't have talent, then I should at least put in effort.
I can't keep relying on this crazy Gallery forever.
After a brief moment of thought, I replied.
ㄴ HellJoseonSlave1 : I do need to study, yeah ㅇㅇ
The moment I posted my reply, the Gallery's mood shifted in an instant.
ㄴ RespiratoryGhost : Oh? You're going to study? Then start by reading my paper list. From the latest COPD guidelines to ARDS
(*Acute Respiratory Distress Syndrome, acute respiratory distress syndrome)
treatment, I've got the full course laid out.
ㄴ HematoOncologyIsHell : Hematology-oncology is fucking hard. You can never conquer it alone. I'll tutor you.
ㄴ BoneNerd88 : If you ever want to see bones, just say the word!
These crazy workaholic bastards.
I let out a dry laugh and closed the Gallery window.
***
'Go buy some pig skin and keep stitching it at home every day.'
One comment from a ghost came to mind.
And so I arrived at my officetel, both hands full of plastic bags stuffed with suturing pig skin.
Alcohol swabs, sutures, surgical instruments, and bright-red pig skin.
Yeah.
Let's do this.
***
A hellscape was unfolding on my officetel kitchen table. A desk lamp served as the surgical light, and beneath it lay pig skin.
A wave of futility washed over me.
'You can borrow a head, but you can't borrow hands.'
Knowledge can be filled in through cheating, but dexterity is mine alone.
'...I should record it and upload it.'
There was no point groaning over it alone.
I needed feedback.
This crazy Gallery can write posts and even take pictures just from my thoughts.
Then there's no reason video recording wouldn't work either.
'Start recording my field of view for one minute starting now.'
A small REC icon appeared in one corner of my view.
Okay.
needle holder
(*Needle Holder, a surgical instrument for holding needles)
and forceps
(*Forceps, medical tweezers)
I picked them up.
Hoo.
One deep breath.
The first needle went toward the pig skin.
Thunk.
Ah, shit.
I went in too deep. The angle was a mess too.
I tried to pull the needle out, but it wouldn't come free. When I yanked on the skin with the forceps, the skin tore grotesquely. Far from tying a knot, I had only made a dirty mess of the wound.
'Stop recording.'
I opened the Gallery and uploaded a new post with the one-minute disaster I had just recorded attached.
Title : [Video] Please give me feedback on pig-skin suturing.
Author : HellJoseonSlave1
The first comment was, as expected, from that bastard.
GodOfScalpels : So this is what it feels like for your eyes to rot.
GodOfScalpels : If you're going to do it like that, quit right now. What you're doing isn't suturing, it's slaughter. I almost feel sorry for that pig bastard.
OperatingRoomGhost3 : Hey!!!! I shut it off the moment I saw the video!!!! The needle goes in at 90 degrees, idiot! If you dig in at 45 degrees, how the fuck is that suturing??
OperatingRoomWallClock : Look at that forceps grip. If you crush it that hard, it'll all necrose later. Pig skin has human rights too, you bastard.
Criticism and abuse poured in from all sides.
Right. 90 degrees.
Ninety degrees.
I started recording once more. This time I focused all my attention on the angle.
Perpendicular. I drove the needle in at a perfect right angle.
Oh, it worked.
This time it went in fairly smoothly.
Smiling, I pulled the needle out from the other side and drew the thread through. Now all that was left was to tie it. Using the surgeon's knot I'd learned
(*knot-tying method)
I tried it.
One wrap, then two.
Huh? My fingers are getting tangled.
The thread is tangling.
'Stop recording.'
I shot another one-minute video and attached it to a comment.
ㄴ HellJoseonSlave1 : [Video] I got the angle right. The knot sucks ass. What's next.
ㄴ PlasticSurgeryAlum : Ugh, look at those fingers. Don't you know instrument tie? How long are you going to keep fiddling with your hands?
ㄴ GodOfScalpels : Is this an intelligence issue? How did you graduate with hands like that? If you were in front of me, I'd have cut your fingers off with a scalpel. That would be the better path for the patient.
I muttered curses under my breath and untangled the thread.
Instrument tie. Instrument ligation.
Right, tying with an instrument.
Recording again.
I grabbed the end of the thread with the needle holder and spun it around the forceps.
Tink-
Ah, fuck. I dropped the thread.
I barely held back the urge to slam my head into the desk.
Right then, the internal medicine bastards started joining in too.
InMyDay : Ah, pointless. Even if you stitch it all night like that, it'll all burst if it gets infected. HellSlave1, if that pig were a diabetic patient, what would you use for wound dressing? Is it okay to disinfect with Betadine? Or not? Answer that.
RespiratoryGhost : Ah, fuck, this is so boring. Feels like I'm aging two years. You'd be better off punching a hole in that pig skin, making a pneumothorax, and practicing inserting a chest tube. That'd be way more fun.
OperatingRoomGhost3 : You internal medicine boomers should shut your mouths and just watch. Can't you see you're witnessing the birth of a sacred surgeon?
HematoOncologyIsHell : Birth, my ass. It's practically on the verge of miscarriage.
I ignored all that bullshit as best I could and focused on the pig skin again.
Recording
Upload
Get cursed out.
And then record again
Upload
Get double cursed out.
Crooked and uneven.
The spacing was a mess, and the knots all looked different.
Sweat ran down my chin and dripped onto the table.
But strangely enough, the more I repeated this insane exercise, the clearer the sensation in my fingertips became.
The grip strength of the hand holding the needle holder, the delicacy of gripping tissue with the forceps, the tension as I pulled the thread.
It wasn't my head doing the remembering anymore; my body started to remember on its own.
By the time I uploaded the eleventh video, the tone of the comments had begun to shift subtly.
PlasticSurgeryAlum : Huh? You've started to get a feel for the tie. Still at child's-play level, though.
OperatingRoomWallClock: You do have some grit. The fact that your mental state hasn't shattered after this much abuse... Emergency medicine does need a tough bastard, yeah ㅇㅇ
And finally, after I uploaded the fifteenth video.
My hand in the video no longer trembled.
It cleanly made five knots in a row at fairly consistent intervals.
GodOfScalpels : From a disgusting piece of trash I didn't even want to look at, you've at least reached chicken-bone level. Do it 1,000 more times. Maybe then you'll be able to imitate a human.
That's the highest praise.
Reading that comment, I couldn't help but chuckle.
I closed the Gallery window.
An intense fatigue washed over my whole body. I wanted to just collapse onto the table and fall asleep.
Still, I did it.
Have a drink.