Chapter 39
I placed my hand on the keyboard. A blank word processor screen.
The blinking cursor.
But when it came time to write the first letter, my fingers wouldn’t move.
My mind went blank.
In the end, with the feeling of grabbing the last lifeline, I knocked on the door of [Dead Doctors Gallery].
Title : Dammit, you bastards, I'm about to get kicked out of the hospitalooooo
Author : HellJoseonSlave1
My desperate cry turned the once-quiet gallery upside down in an instant.
ㅇㅇ (210.94) : What??? Fired??
Operating Room Ghost 3 : Shit, that won't do! Hey! Wait! Calm down!
Back In My Day : If you saved a life, they probably wouldn't fire you outright. I guarantee it. But... they might dock your pay or extend your training. Maybe a three-month suspension?
Bone Nerd 88 : No way, Hell Slave!!!!! If you get kicked out of the university hospital, you'll never be able to open a clinic with those clumsy-ass hands of yours!!! Then who's going to look at my marrow slides?!?!
That wasn’t comfort at all.
Especially that bone freak was thinking only of himself to the very end.
Yeah, we were in the same boat.
If I got fired here, the ghosts' only real-world attraction would disappear.
After a while, the gallery finally reached a consensus.
‘Let’s save Hell Slave first.’
And then began the worst collaboration no one had wanted.
So, with help from Scalpel God, I started writing the incident report.
I wrote the first sentence.
‘The patient was in severe hypovolemic shock upon arrival.’
Then I paused and asked Scalpel God a question.
HellJoseonSlave1 : So there really was no other option? Seriously? Couldn't we have just flooded him with fluids and blood and kept him going until surgery?
Scalpel God : The patient was already in ATLS
(* Advanced Trauma Life Support)
shock. His blood pressure couldn't be restored, and if we didn't stop the source of the bleeding, he would have gone into cardiac arrest and died within ten minutes.
Ugh... ha... fine.
Listening to that explanation, I copied exactly what Scalpel God dictated into the incident report.
‘...Therefore, I judged that continuous fluid and transfusion therapy alone would not sustain the patient's life, and, as the only means of directly identifying and controlling the source of bleeding, I resolved to perform damage control through emergency laparotomy.’
Wow. That sentence sounds insanely professional.
I kept asking questions.
HellJoseonSlave1 : Going in through a midline incision?
Scalpel God : The fastest approach and the best way to secure the widest field of view. Write that exactly as is.
HellJoseonSlave1 : Packing the abdominal quadrants?
Scalpel God : A standard technique used to find the bleeding site while reducing overall blood loss. Write that one exactly too. It's textbook material anyone can see.
The back-and-forth with Scalpel God continued.
I took down the replies and filled in the blanks of the incident report.
The incident report was becoming a medically perfect document, with not a single margin of error.
But the real problem started now.
The part that couldn't be explained medically.
HellJoseonSlave1 : ...So how should I write the part where I used casual speech with the seniors and acted rude toward the professor?
My question made Scalpel God fall silent for a moment.
Scalpel God : Just gloss over it with something like, ‘I was so focused on the patient in shock that I couldn't properly perceive my surroundings.’
...Gloss over it? Is that something you can just gloss over?
HellJoseonSlave1 : No, do you actually think that makes any sense?
Scalpel God : Then what are you going to write? It's not like you're going to write, ‘My inner black dragon awakened and I became arrogant without realizing it.’ Anyway, sorry. Be careful next time.
Fuck.
Fair enough.
With a deep sigh, I added a line to the incident report as instructed.
Next problem.
This was the real highlight.
HellJoseonSlave1 : How do I explain that a first-year resident with insane hand skills performed the surgery? I can't exactly write that you possessed my body and did it. The whole hospital knows I'm an idiot who can't even get an IV in, so how am I supposed to explain that I suddenly became a god of laparotomy?
At my desperate question, Scalpel God once again gave a clear answer.
Scalpel God : ...Just gloss over that one too.
HellJoseonSlave1 : That's the most important part, you damn ghost!!!!!!
Scalpel God : Then what are you going to do? You can't write, ‘I was actually a hidden genius surgical fanatic who hid my skills for the sake of humility all this time.’ Just write something like, ‘With the single-minded determination to save the patient, I performed the procedure, honed only through visualization training, while exerting superhuman focus.’ There was never a way to explain it sensibly in the first place.
I was crushed all over again by those words.
Right. There was no way to explain it sensibly.
Because something nonsensical had actually happened.
In the end, I had to package the secret of my miraculous hand skills in a fantasy-novel-sounding phrase like ‘superhuman focus and visualization training.’
Was there really anyone who would believe this?
***
Meanwhile, Yoo Seonghun sat in the station chair, pressing his temple as he held his head.
He couldn't tear his eyes away from the empty bed in Resus Room 2.
What had just happened there a moment ago was impossible to accept as reality.
His brain refused to process the information.
Yoo Seonghun had spent the past hour desperately replaying everything. Everything was wrong.
First, Han Hyeonjae was crazy.
This was an obvious fact. He'd suddenly gone dead-eyed and started spitting casual speech right in his seniors' faces. This wasn't just a stress reaction or a temporary state of shock. He had clearly developed a serious mental problem.
Second, that lunatic put a knife to the patient's body.
The very Han Hyeonjae, a first-year in emergency medicine—someone who couldn't even properly place an IV line, someone with no procedural skill at all and who used to leave more bruises on patients' forearms than on his own—had picked up a scalpel and cut a man's belly open.
At that point, it should have ended as nothing more than a horrific medical accident—an infamous attempted-murder case by a deranged resident.
But then.
Third, that lunatic saved the patient.
The dying patient. The patient who had already stepped onto the threshold of death from massive blood loss.
Fourth, and he did it with surgery.
It wasn't a botched hack job. In Yoo Seonghun's eyes—and even in Professor Kang Hyeonjun's, a surgeon's eyes—it was a swift, precise, near-perfect damage-control operation.
Fifth, that surgery hadn't taken place in an operating room equipped with state-of-the-art equipment, but in an ER resuscitation bay exposed to all kinds of contamination.
Sixth, the one who performed it wasn't a surgeon with decades of experience, but an emergency medicine doctor.
Seventh, and the most absurd fact of all.
That the one who did all of it was not even a specialist, but a resident who had barely even shed his first-year badge.
Does that even make sense?
Each proposition could stand on its own.
Crazy first-year.
A doctor who saved a patient.
ER treatment.
But all of these propositions happened simultaneously within a single person named Han Hyeonjae.
It's a logical contradiction.
A breakdown of causality.
Yoo Seonghun's brain stopped thinking. Reason could no longer handle this incident.
Yoo Seonghun called out to Nam Juhyeon, who was sitting beside him and staring into space with the same dazed expression.
“Hey, Juhyeon.”
“...Yes, doctor.”
“This....”
Yoo Seonghun couldn't bring himself to continue and only moved his lips.
“Do you think this makes sense?”
“Huh? What does?”
Nam Juhyeon asked back with unfocused eyes.
“Hyeonjae.”
At that two-syllable name, Nam Juhyeon frowned as if trying to think for a moment, then shook his head.
“Ah... I don't know?”
Seeing that reaction, Yoo Seonghun was certain his thoughts weren't wrong.
Yoo Seonghun leaned toward Nam Juhyeon and lowered his voice.
“No, seriously. Isn't he possessed by something or what?”
“...Huh?”
“Think about it. That hand movement. That casual speech. This can't just be explained by awakening or a burst of latent potential.”
Yoo Seonghun's voice was growing more and more certain.
He was reaching the most irrational conclusion possible in the face of a phenomenon reason couldn't explain.
“Isn't there some decent shaman around our hospital? Shouldn't we do a shamanic ritual or something?”
At that earnest question, Nam Juhyeon only looked at Yoo Seonghun with an expression that seemed to say, 'Why are all us EM fourth-years like this...'
***
I stared blankly at the incident report I had just finished.
EmergencyMedicine_HanHyeonjae_IncidentReport_FinalFinal.docs
Who on earth would believe this bullshit?
With a deep sigh, I closed the laptop.
Whatever happens, happens.
My head was a mess.
I wanted to forget about it for a while.
I logged back into [Dead Doctors Gallery] without thinking.
I scrolled down and found the trace of the scream I had left behind.
And beneath that post, I discovered a new festival unfolding in a completely unexpected direction.
Triggered by my incident, the ghosts were each pouring out the disciplinary stories they'd buried in their hearts.
=========
Title : [Story] Since Hell Slave is headed to the disciplinary committee, here's the old-timer story that came to mind.
Author : ㅇㅇ (118.235)
There was a time when I couldn't wait for the medical helicopter to land and jumped from 1.5 meters up.
Below me, a polytrauma patient was bleeding out, and the helicopter was struggling against the strong wind.
The pilot and the paramedic freaked out and tried to stop me, but I jumped anyway.
Thanks to that, I saved the patient, but when I got back to the hospital, they held a disciplinary committee over aviation-law violations and whatnot, made me write a formal apology, and everything blew up in my face, lol.
=========
I let out a dry laugh.
Operating Room Ghost 3 : Crazy badass hahahaha so was your ankle okay?
ㄴ ㅇㅇ (118.235) : Yeah, I was fine. Don't underestimate a Special Forces background.
Back In My Day : Hmm, I think getting disciplined for that was the right call.
ㄴ ㅇㅇ (118.235) : This damn boomer fossil bastard, seriously.
Starting with that post, all kinds of legendary hero tales, or just crazy stunt stories, began pouring out.
=========
Title : The reason I got disciplined was ‘assault.’
Author : ER Fighter
There was a lunatic in the ER waving a knife around.
He was a guardian, throwing a fit because they weren't seeing his father fast enough.
Even the security staff were at their wits' end, and the police said they'd only be there in five minutes.
I couldn't just stand there and watch anymore.
So I decided to use the fastest and most effective sedative treatment on him.
=========
ㅇㅇ (118.235) : Ketamine?
ㄴ ER Fighter : I landed a straight right on his jaw and put him to sleep. He went out cold in one shot. Later I got sued for excessive force and the hospital held a disciplinary committee saying I'd caused a violent incident. But the other patients' guardians in the ER that day all backed me up, so it ended with only a light punishment. That lunatic got arrested. I still think that was the best treatment possible.
As I read that post, I clenched my fist without realizing it.
He's definitely a madman.
The next post was a little more academic.
=========
Title : I almost got disciplined for attempted murder.
Author : Cardiology Wraith
Back when I was a first-year fellow, a patient with massive PE
(* massive pulmonary embolism)
came in, and his blood pressure was dropping, right on the verge of cardiac arrest.
Back then, the only answer for a patient like that was to surgically scrape the clot out.
But the OR wouldn't be ready for two hours. The patient looked like he'd die within thirty minutes.
So I went ahead with the tPA I'd just seen in a paper
(* thrombolytic agent)
and administered it.
Back then, using it for pulmonary embolism wasn't allowed, you know? Because it could kill the patient through systemic bleeding?
And sure enough, our department chief came running over, grabbed me by the collar, and shouted that I was trying to kill the patient.
I just said screw it and pushed ahead. Yeah.
And then, thirty minutes later, the patient's oxygen saturation came up and his blood pressure returned.
He survived, like a miracle.
Of course, that got me a disciplinary committee, and I was docked half a year's salary and got chewed out like a dog.
But in the end it ended up in the standard guidelines, didn't it? Haha. My only crime was being too far ahead of my time.
=========
Starting with those posts, the gallery was filled with all kinds of outlandish disciplinary stories.
As I read each of those stories, I found myself laughing without realizing it.
So they were crazy bastards who broke rules and crossed boundaries in their own ways, in their own eras.
I didn't feel nearly as terrified of the disciplinary committee anymore.
Of course, it was still scary, shitty, and something I wanted to avoid.
But at least I wasn't trembling with fear like before, convinced my doctor life was over.
Rather, I even felt a strange sense of belonging.
So I was going to add my three-syllable name to the lineage of those legendary lunatics now.
‘The bastard who sliced a patient's belly open in the ER.’
...Still, since I didn't do it myself, isn't that a bit weak?
I snorted a laugh and closed the laptop with the incident report saved on it.