Chapter 3
"Um, are sleeveless tops like this... underwear?"
"They used to be mostly worn under outer clothes, like underwear, but as you know, cropped tops are in fashion these days, right?"
"Ah, cropped tops..."
"So it's pretty common these days to see people wearing a jacket over a short sleeveless top."
"Ah, I've seen that a bit on the streets."
"Try this on too."
Jiyeon said this and brought over an extremely short sleeveless top.
"Um, this... seems too short."
"Unlike men's pants, women's pants generally come up to the lower abdomen, so this one isn't actually that short. Try it on as a set with this."
Jiyeon said as she brought over various clothes, including pants and jackets.
I changed in the fitting room a total of seven times while choosing clothes, as if I were a mannequin.
"Most of them look good on you. Clothes that are too short become even shorter because of your breasts, so I'll pick out some that are a more suitable length."
"Yes, thank you..."
Even the employee was surprised, saying it was the first time they'd seen someone of my size, so I had to cover my bright-red face with my hands yet again.
I carried the shopping bags toward the escalator.
"Jia? Where are you going?"
"Huh? Haven't we bought enough by now?"
"Come on, we've still got a long way to go. Lunch is coming up, so let's just look around one or two more places."
I had already bought several outfits, and we were going to look around one or two more places before lunch...?
Even just thinking about it, that meant we'd be looking around for several more hours after lunch...?
Aaaah, I'm tired...
"Let's focus on buying jeans first."
"Jeans are the easiest thing to wear casually."
"Yes, that too, but let's buy some blouses and skirts as well."
"W...what? S-skirts??"
"With a figure like yours, it would be stranger not to wear skirts."
"Um, is that so?"
We decided to try on just one last outfit before going to lunch.
I entered the fitting room with a skirt and blouse, but...
A skirt... She was already telling me to try on a skirt. Ugh... I felt like I was going to die of embarrassment.
The blouse was similar to the shirts I had worn as a man, differing only in the cut, so I had no trouble putting it on, but...
A skirt...? First, I lowered the zipper... and tried putting it on.
Ugh... I was definitely wearing it, but it felt so empty, like I wasn't wearing anything at all...
I'm supposed to pull it up this far, right...?
'Knock, knock, knock'
"Y-yes?"
"Are you having trouble putting on the skirt?"
"Ah, I put it on for now, but I don't know if this is right."
"I'll help you a little."
Jiyeon carefully opened the door, came in, and adjusted my skirt a little.
'Whether it's pants or a skirt, when you don't know how high to wear it, just use your navel as a rough guide.'
As I listened to her explanation, I fixed my skirt, nodded, and stepped out of the fitting room.
"Take a look in the mirror and check."
When I turned around and looked in the full-length mirror, a woman was standing there who had absolutely nothing in common with the person I had been before.
There were a few problems, though: the woman's figure was extremely full on top and bottom, and everything moved whenever I did.
A full figure looked good, but when it was my body, it made things difficult in all sorts of ways.
Of course, it looked beautiful, drew every eye, and made people envious, so I felt good because it looked nice, but...
The problem was that my pelvis hurt a little every time I walked.
Of course, it probably hurt because my posture was wrong, but I had been male until yesterday and was walking as usual. Since the size of my pelvis had changed,
walking with my usual posture made my pelvis ache, while walking in a way that didn't hurt made me adopt what you might call a wiggling-butt posture. It was embarrassing...
But what could I do? If it hurt, something was wrong, so I had to walk in a way that didn't hurt. The protagonists in novels all adapt eventually, so I had to adapt too.
The sensations in my body were a little sensitive right now, but this would probably get better with time as well.
In any case, the hardest part was still my breasts. Not only had I suddenly grown breasts—large ones at that—but their weight made my shoulders ache constantly.
Creative works exaggerate things for entertainment, but there was no way this could be an exaggeration. People often compare them to the size of a head, and having two things that large attached to your chest would obviously be incredibly heavy.
That was what my body was like now. My waist hurt too, but my shoulders... they ached terribly.
"Jia? Is something wrong?"
"Huh? Ah, no, nothing's wrong."
"But..."
Jiyeon said this while pointing toward my eyes.
When she touched my eye, tears...? Why was I crying?
"Are you okay...? Does something hurt?"
"No, it doesn't hurt, but..."
"Then that's a relief... Still, let's go get lunch to cheer you up!"
"Yes, let's."
I wiped my tears with the handkerchief Jiyeon had given me, and we headed to the food court for lunch.
We looked over the menu and decided to have stew.
Kimchi stew and yukgaejang were dependable choices when you weren't sure what to eat.
Before long, our food came out, and we brought it over to our seats.
After taking a few bites, Jiyeon spoke up.
"Jia... are you really okay?"
"I'm really okay. Nothing sad happened, so I don't know why I started crying."
"It might be hormonal... It would be a lie to say this isn't hard after changing overnight."
"Is that so...?"
"When you're feeling down, sweets are the best. Let's get something sweet after we finish eating."
"Will we have room for dessert after eating all this...?"
A little while later, after finishing our meal, we ordered ice cream at a nearby shop.
Since we had just eaten something hot, I thought it would be best to rinse my mouth before having something cold, so I rinsed it with cold water and came back.
I didn't know why, but Jiyeon held my hand both when we went to the bathroom and when we headed back toward the food court.
I had heard that women sometimes went to the bathroom together, but didn't friends usually hold hands like this...?
"Oh my, it looks like the sisters came shopping together~"
I heard the voices of passing women.
Sisters? There weren't any people here who looked like sisters.
Most of them looked like couples or friends...?
Sisters? Who were they talking about?
"Oh my, I guess we looked like sisters."
"Huh? We do?"
"Your appearance has gotten younger, so it's not impossible."
"I-is that so...?"
Sisters...? We looked like sisters...?
Obviously, I must have looked completely like a woman, even at a glance.
Should I be sad that I had changed, or happy that although I had changed, I didn't look strange...?
My feelings were so complicated.
To soothe my complicated feelings, we ordered ice cream.
We ordered a large size with three standard flavors—chocolate, strawberry, and Oreo—but...
"Can we eat all this...? It seems like quite a lot..."
"Of course. We can finish this without any trouble. It'll be a lot of calories, but... it's not a filling dessert."
In response to my worried question, Jiyeon shook her head and said,
I had eaten entire tubs of supermarket ice cream by myself before, but
if there was one thing I had learned after my body changed today, it was that my stomach had definitely shrunk.
Could I finish it...? I didn't know, but let's eat first.
"Mmm~ It's delicious~"
"Right? Sweets are the best for cheering yourself up."
"As expected, Oreo is the most reliably delicious flavor."
"It's a fairly expensive brand, so we can't have it often, you know."
"Right."
I learned this and that while listening to Jiyeon.
She especially emphasized that I had to be careful with my legs when wearing a skirt.
She told me to be especially careful not to let anything show on the subway, but since I normally carried a backpack and was used to placing it on my lap, I didn't think it would be a major problem.
I also wondered how often I would even ride the subway in this body.
"By the way, Jia."
"Yes."
"Don't you think you've gotten way younger?"
"Huh?"
"I mean, you looked a little young before, but you still clearly had an adult feel to you. Now you don't look like an adult at all."
"Um, is that so...? Come to think of it, people called us sisters earlier too..."
"You might have to start high school all over again. Hahaha."
"That much? Thank you."
"Now that we've eaten everything, let's finish shopping."
"Ah, okay."
Since it was still winter, I bought a few hoodies, as well as some basic sweatshirts...
Aside from underwear, the most awkward part of getting dressed was tops.
Sleeveless tops (tank tops) were a little short, so it was impossible to tuck them into my pants like I used to...
Whatever I wore over them, my breasts made the clothes stick out, so I had to choose my clothes carefully to keep them from doing so.
Either way, I couldn't help the attention, so I decided to wear clothes that fit properly and avoid looking heavier.
"Jia! Try this on too."
"The hoodie... seems a little short?"
"It's fine, try it on. With these pants."
After wearing a skirt and blouse, what was wrong with wearing a slightly short hoodie?
I changed clothes and stepped out of the fitting room, where I found Jiyeon staring blankly at me.
"J-Jiyeon? Are you okay?"
"Huh? Ah, yes, yes. I'm fine. I was surprised because the hoodie suits you so well."
I only chose sweatshirts that didn't puff out, and bought a hoodie that fit my body fairly snugly as well.
I bought about two fleece jackets too, which would be good to wear on moderately cold days.
Aside from when I was in the military... I had never worn this kind of clothing, and now I was wearing it again. You really never knew what life had in store.
I had thought I'd never wear one again.
"Ah, it's getting a little late. I should head straight back to the hospital."
"You're right. Let's get back quickly."
Jiyeon regretted not being able to teach me about cosmetics, hooked my arm against her side, and headed for the hospital.
No, I appreciated everything, but earlier she had held my hand, and now she had my arm tucked against her side...?
Was this Jiyeon's way of showing affection? Or did lots of women act like this?
Ah, whatever. My hands were already full of shopping bags, and I was too exhausted from shopping to think about it.
Let's just take it as it comes. If I had originally been a woman, I probably would have treated a pretty female friend well too.
"Excuse me!"
"M-me?"
"Yes, Jiㅎ... Um, what should I call you?"
Ah~ Now that I looked closely, it was the government agent who had come yesterday. I had no idea what their exact identity was, but they didn't seem to be using a false identity, and it wasn't my concern anyway.
Studying me would probably have all sorts of medical and scientific benefits, so that seemed to be why they had approached me. But the offer of a considerable amount of financial support made it difficult to refuse.
So I couldn't very well say no.
"I decided on Jia. That's what I'll use when I legally change my name later, too."
"I see. That's a pretty name. But those shopping bags...?"
"I thought Jia might not have any clothes to wear, so I got permission and went shopping with her."
"I see. Ahem. You must have had a hard time, Jia."
Yes, I had had a very hard time. We had gone shopping almost as soon as the stores opened, eaten lunch, and then shopped for several more hours. Even though I had mostly bought hoodies and sweatshirts, it had taken a long time because I had to try on all sorts of things to put together outfits for each style.
When I was so exhausted that I thought I couldn't take it anymore, Jiyeon asked what I liked and used that as a carrot.
I really loved drinks, and when she said she would buy me a limited-edition drink they were selling, I started drooling... In the end, I surrendered and went shopping until the very end.
"The hospital discharge procedures are already taken care of, so tomorrow morning you'll just fill out a few forms, change clothes, and go home."
"Yes, thank you."
"Jia."
"Yes?"
"Hang in there."
"Ah, okay..."
The agent gave me some cryptic encouragement, then said they had other business and drove away.
What...? Was it about shopping? Or were they telling me to take care of myself? Either way, I appreciated hearing it.
It meant they were worried about me. Maybe it was because I lived alone... or because I didn't have many friends, but people rarely contacted me first.
"Jia, I just remembered something I forgot."
"Yes? What is it?"
"Um, sanitary pads and such..."
"Ah, that... I forgot too. The gynecological exam said my uterus was normal, so they told me to make sure to buy pads."
"Tomorrow's Friday, so give me your contact information. Let's go buy them together after work."
"Would that be okay?"
"What part?"
"Of course they're necessary, but I'd heard that a lot of people feel embarrassed buying them..."
"Ah, it is a little awkward. But we won't be buying only pads, and there are plenty of other things to get."
"Other things to buy...?"
"Yes, we need to celebrate. A party to celebrate your discharge, Jia."
"There's no need to go as far as having a party..."
"When your first friend came with 119, you were in a really dangerous state. Your fever was 40 degrees, and I was so worried."
"Ah... Come to think of it, you're right. Thank you for saving me."
"...!"
Jiyeon's face turned red, as if she were embarrassed.
What was going on? I thought it was an ordinary expression of gratitude... Had I said something wrong...?
I returned to my hospital room, changed back into my patient clothes, and returned the clothes I had borrowed from Jiyeon.
After one last simple examination, the doctor warned me to apply a warm compress if my lower abdomen hurt badly and to be sure to come to the hospital if it still hurt. I returned to my room and ate dinner.
The gynecologist told me to buy pads in the right size and have them ready. She seemed so worried that she went on about so many things that it felt like nagging, but considering this might be the world's first case of the condition, it was understandable.
Maybe it was because I had eaten lunch out, but the hospital dinner tasted a little bland. Then again, perhaps the hospital food wasn't bland so much as the food outside had been seasoned so intensely.
The yukgaejang at the gomtang restaurant I'd visited with my family before had been so strongly seasoned that even I, who normally liked salty food, found it too salty.
My father said that the flavor came from simmering it for a long time and drawing it out of the green onions, but it had tasted too salty to me...
Anyway, the conclusion was that I didn't think hospital food was all that bland.
Sodium was necessary for the human body, so it couldn't possibly contain none at all.
I thought I only failed to notice it because I usually ate food that was too sweet and salty.
"I'm being discharged tomorrow already... It's a good thing I've gotten better so quickly... right?"
"Did you enjoy your dinner?"
"Ah, Jiyeon! Yes, it was pretty good."
"Since you ate out for lunch, you may have found it lightly seasoned... I'm glad it suited your palate."
"We season it a little more for everyone except diabetic patients."
"Ah, so that's why it tasted okay~ Everyone thinks hospital food has no flavor. They probably notice it even more because they're used to strongly seasoned food."
"Exactly. But with retort meals, instant ramen, eating out, and so on, everything is intensely seasoned. It's understandable that people think that."
"But are you really okay to go home tomorrow? Since you live alone, your place is probably a little cramped, and you left without tidying up..."
"It was an emergency. It's okay. My place isn't clean either."
"Then that's a relief."
After finishing my last examination and filling out a few forms, I fell into thought.
After spending a day like today, I was slowly beginning to feel that I had really become a woman.
As for looking younger... I would have to think about that. I did look young enough that a stranger might mistake me for a high school student.
Well, I supposed I would see what tomorrow brought.
It was still January, anyway, and school wouldn't start until March 1, so even if I ended up enrolling, it shouldn't be a major problem. But would I make any friends?
I had always been alone in high school, without so much as a friend in another class... Would anything really change just because I went back to high school?
I didn't know. For now, I should just go to sleep...