Chapter 50
As I sat on the sofa, spacing out, I suddenly wondered whether I could continue living in this body. I had become weaker than other women, and while it was kind to call myself curvy, the less charitable description would be that I had too much flesh, which made even daily life inconvenient in many ways.
I had realized something from the men who had approached me before. I was no longer a man but undeniably a woman. Apparently, merely telling my brain that I was now in a woman's body wasn't enough; even my hormones had softened my mind just like my body, making it impossible to see myself as a man anymore.
No matter how emotional I might have been compared to other people, I had never felt like crying or shed tears simply because someone bigger, stronger, and more imposing than me had pressured me. But I was doing that now. Was it because I had realized that, if the other person really wanted to, they could do whatever they wanted with me?
"Jia? Is something wrong?"
"Huh? Oh, nothing's wrong."
"All right. If Jia says so, then I guess that's how it is. Let's eat."
Even after we finished dinner, Unnie still hadn't come home by eight in the evening. Was she really that busy...? Minsu oppa was probably staying because of me too... I began to feel sorry. I wasn't sure what kind of soup to call the one oppa had made, but it was incredibly delicious. It was a light soup, so the meat might have tasted greasy, but the small amount of pepper cut through the richness nicely and made it easy to eat.
"Unnie's really late..."
"I know. There must be a lot of patients. Do you want to go to bed first if you're tired?"
"It's not even ten yet, and I'm fine. Hngh..."
I said I was fine, but my body refused to cooperate and yawned as if telling me to stop resisting and go to sleep, so I covered my mouth. Still, I thought I would feel more at ease if I saw Unnie before going to bed. Maybe it would be okay to sleep first and greet her when she came home. My body was far too exhausted to ignore its signals telling me to sleep. I felt as though I would fall asleep on the spot if I spaced out for just two minutes.
"Uuugh...! I'll wash up first."
"All right. Take your clothes with you."
Hoping Unnie would be home by the time I came back from washing up, I placed my wrist under the stream from the shower, gently turned the faucet toward hot, adjusted the temperature, and let the pressure wash over my body. It was warm and felt good. When the stream touched sensitive areas, I felt a little... excited, or whatever you wanted to call it, which was embarrassing, though...
'Huh? Is Unnie home?'
After drying my body and roughly wiping the water from my hair, I got dressed and came out, but Minsu oppa was nowhere to be seen. Where had he gone...? I should dry my hair first. It was still wet, and the weight of it wasn't particularly pleasant.
That's strange. Did he go pick Unnie up...? I don't think I heard anything... Before I knew it, twenty minutes had passed while I dried my hair. Then I heard the keypad, and Jiyeon Unnie came in. Had oppa gone home...? Well, he was a busy person, so he might have been called away and rushed off.
"How are you feeling, Jia?"
"I'm feeling a little better. I'm going to bed early."
"Let's let you rest well at home over the weekend and get you examined on Monday."
"Yes, Unnie."
Whether I had really been feeling unwell or was simply exhausted, I must have gone to bed at ten and opened my eyes at ten the next morning, twelve hours later. Once I woke up and came to my senses, a huge yawn burst from my mouth. After lying there for about five minutes, I gradually began to feel strength returning to my body, as though the blood had finally started circulating.
I couldn't hear Unnie. Had she gone out? Maybe because I had slept for twelve hours, but I really needed to use the bathroom... And when I opened the door, I saw Unnie and hurriedly shut it again.
"S-sorry, Unnie! I didn't know you were in there!"
"It's okay. I was just getting up to wash my hands."
It seemed the door had opened just as she was finishing and getting up. Should I consider that a fortunate escape...? I had been in such a hurry, and I was still half-asleep, so I hadn't even checked whether the light was on before opening the door. It was my fault.
"I'm sorry. I woke up this morning and suddenly had to go so badly..."
"It's okay. You slept soundly for twelve hours without waking once, so of course you'd have to go badly."
Perhaps she was more worried about my condition, because Unnie placed a hand on my shoulder and rubbed it. Having the person who made me feel safest right beside me put my mind at ease.
*
Apparently, the reason Jia hadn't been seen all morning yesterday was that she'd been in the nurse's office. I didn't know the details, but according to the rumors going around school, Jia was frail. She really did go to the nurse's office often, and the girls had quietly stood by her without saying anything, so... Wasn't that proof that she was seriously ill?
Usually, if there was a girl who went to the nurse's office often, people would say something about it, even if only a little. The girls might have kept quiet because they could empathize with her pain... but the boys were obviously acting that way because they had fallen for Jia, right?
There were eight rivals, and ten girls who would block me like a wall whenever I approached Jia. This was practically a security detail, wasn't it? For now, I should focus on becoming closer to Yuna, who sat beside Jia. I should contact Yuna sometime.
"Hello? This is Jinwoo."
[Why? Is something wrong?]
"It's nothing important. Are you free this weekend?"
[I am, but tell me why. What is your purpose?]
"I want to take Jia out somewhere, and I thought it would be nice if you came along too, Yuna."
[You don't know? Jia's sick.]
"Was Jia really in the nurse's office when she was nowhere to be seen yesterday morning?"
[Yeah~ Jia didn't have any strength, so she stayed in the nurse's office all morning. I don't know if you noticed, but she wasn't doing well in the afternoon either.]
"Really...? I guess it can't be helped."
[I'm busy, so I'm hanging up.]
Yuna hung up just like that. Was it because she thought it had nothing to do with her? She had seemed to listen carefully when I was talking about Jia, but as soon as Jia was out of the conversation, she quickly hung up. What should I do now...? Was there any way to contact Jia directly?
"What are you doing, Kwon Jinwoo?"
"Oh, Noona."
"Are you making a love call?"
"It's not that. I called to ask for help, but it sounds like the girl I like is sick..."
"Then get her number at school and visit her in the hospital later."
"It's not that easy. She's so beautiful that anyone would fall for her, so I have to get past not only all the boys in her class but also the girls who guard her like a wall..."
My sister said that if I really liked someone, I should just take the plunge instead of calculating every little thing. Did I really like her that much? Of course I liked her, but I was scared because I expected the consequences of my actions to be impossible to handle...
I was aimlessly browsing an online community when I found a provocative title. I didn't know what it was, but I clicked it out of boredom.
"Uh... Isn't this Jia from behind?"
A flood of sexually harassing comments began appearing.
-She's damn hot
-What is this? Is she an idol trainee?
-I want to pound her
ㄴYou crazy bastard
ㄴBut she looks damn fuckable, right? Agreed?
ㄴAgreed
-Her tits are fucking huge. Are those implants?
ㄴI think I saw her passing OO Hospital. Judging by how they sway, they're natural.
ㄴI heard she's a high schooler, so take your hands off the keyboard lol
-Everyone, take your hands off the keyboard!!!
-Gyaaaah!!
-Run!
Shocked by the countless sexually harassing comments, I hit refresh, only to find that the post had been deleted. I even held down on the image and tried to save the photo, but an error occurred... Had the post been deleted in the meantime? Internet trolls never deleted their own posts...
The posts that appeared afterward said things like, 'If it was deleted this quickly even though the administrator didn't do it, doesn't that mean there's something going on?' and 'Aren't all the people who commented going to be arrested?' Seeing the administrators distance themselves by saying they knew nothing about it made it seem as though something really was going on...
Ugh, I don't know. I should sleep in a little longer and eat afterward...
"Huh? Wait a second??? No, it's six in the morning...!"
...Usually, even if someone reported a post at this hour, it wouldn't be deleted so quickly. The picture had been taken so that her face wasn't visible, it had been uploaded at a time when there were few administrators online, and the administrators hadn't deleted it...? My sister had gotten up early because she said she was going somewhere... How was I supposed to make sense of a provocative post uploaded early in the morning being deleted so quickly?
'Aaaah, I don't know! Let's just sleep!'
"Jinwoo, what are you doing? Is your unrequited love hurting that badly?"
"I-it's not like that!"
"Pfft... With that expression? You look like you're about to go crazy from worrying about the woman you love—khk, I almost spit out the water I was drinking."
"Ah, I don't know! I'm going to sleep!"
I don't know. It must have been someone else who merely looked a little like Jia. If I imagined Jia seeing something like that on the internet... Ugh, what a horrible thought.
*
Haa... All I can do is sigh. I saved full screenshots as evidence, but more and more people have been spotting Jia and uploading pictures of her... I thought it was understandable since she walked to and from school, but the comments had gone far beyond the line.
If I told Jia, it would hurt her, but I couldn't simply leave things as they were either... The process of giving her a new identity had already been completed in March, so there was no reason I had to delete every picture of Jia that appeared online... But seeing Jia, who had barely managed to pull herself together and now relied on me, made it impossible for me to leave those online sex offenders alone.
'Should I tell Jia soon and file charges against all of them? There were even some pictures where her face was visible...'
Crimes targeting runaway teenagers have been increasing sharply lately, so my colleagues and I had become extremely busy. We could mobilize a large number of police officers, but that would only make the scumbags hide more carefully. It was better for us to move secretly.
"Team Leader Jeong~ How's it going?"
"What brings you here, Song Yejin?"
"Why are you calling me by my surname when it's just the two of us? Call me by my name~"
"If you're here to fool around, leave."
"All right, all right. Why are you being so cold~?"
I was already busy and had a lot on my mind because of Jia, so why had she come all the way here to bother me...? Did she have something for my team to handle?
"If you have something for my team, tell me right away. I'm busy."
"You're handling the sex crimes against minors these days, right?"
"That's right. Why?"
Her name was Song Yejin, and she had entered this line of work at the same time as me. Unlike me, she was almost uncomfortably sociable and friendly, so I had expected her to quit soon... But whenever she went into action, she moved faster and more nimbly than anyone else and often caught wanted criminals.
She could slip through spaces that men like me, with our large frames and height, had trouble getting through, and often played a major role in arrests. She was quite pretty too, so I hadn't expected her to be so tough... But when we arrested a man who had kidnapped a young child and done unspeakable things to them, even I was startled by the terrifying force with which she overwhelmed everyone around her.
'She can't compare to Jia, but she is attractive enough to charm an ordinary person in no time...'
In truth, Yejin was only inferior when compared to Jia or Ms. Jiyeon. Compared to the average figure, she had an incredible body too. She didn't seem to spend that much money on skincare, but her skin was remarkable as well...
"I'm pretty, aren't I? You were thinking about me, weren't you, Minsu?"
"That's right, you're pretty. So hurry up, say what you came to say, and leave."
"We've known each other for years, and you're still so cold~ It just makes me want to get closer."
I was already busy to death, so I had no idea why she kept talking to me. She couldn't possibly like me, so was she interested in Lee Donghyun from my team? He seemed to like Subin... If there was a man on my team she was interested in, I could understand her acting this way to some extent.
"So what do you need my people for?"
"I want you to round up the ones who've been moving around in a relatively organized group."
"All right. I'll gather all the available personnel and start tomorrow. Is it urgent?"
"It's not that urgent, but I'd appreciate it if you could do it within three days."
"All right."
Song Yejin finally left after making that request. She wasn't a bad person, but perhaps because our personalities didn't match, or perhaps because she was so noisy... She really knew how to wear me out. In any case, what should I do? The serious sexually harassing posts being uploaded along with pictures of Jia had appeared after she received her new identity, so legal action was possible...
Several other people besides me had been assigned to handle these matters, but we also had to deal with pictures of our own personnel being posted, so it was difficult to devote all our resources solely to Jia's case. Sometimes I felt bad, as though I were censoring people, but some things would be devastating if they became known, so I deleted everything without exception.
That day, Minsu, who had been completely absorbed in thoughts of Jia, had no idea what Song Yejin was plotting or why she kept hovering around him.
*
Minsu, honestly... I had been making my feelings this obvious, yet he still didn't understand them. Having known Minsu for several years, I knew he wasn't the type to pretend not to know on purpose... If he was acting that way because he was embarrassed, it should have shown.
"Subin, help your unnie out..."
"Minsu sunbae still doesn't get it?"
"No... It seems like Minsu still doesn't know how I feel..."
Since Subin was a junior who was close to Minsu, I thought she might be able to help me. I'd been taking Subin's advice and acting on it for several months, but unfortunately, Minsu still didn't understand my feelings. If I became close to the child Minsu was protecting, would he start paying attention to me too?
Minsu would soon become busy as well. If I protected that child when Minsu could no longer look after them himself, it might earn me some favor with him.
"If I took over protecting the person under Minsu's protection, do you think something good would come of it?"
"Yejin Unnie, that sounds like a really reckless move... You know how much Minsu sunbae cares about that child."
"Really? Is it so impossible that I shouldn't even try?"
"I heard that when I went to that party as part of the security detail, Lee Kangho approached the protectee and hurled vulgar insults at them, and Minsu sunbae completely snapped and beat him as if he intended to kill him."
"...That's a little scary."
So Minsu really was serious about that protectee... Minsu, who always kept his expression under control and almost never showed his emotions, had beaten someone as if he meant to kill him...? That was starting to scare me. What if I approached him for no reason and got beaten too?
I suppose I should wait for Minsu to open up and tell me himself. Even so, I don't want to see Minsu lose his poker face and explode emotionally. He's truly impossible to control once he gets angry.