Chapter 48
Crack-crackle!!
The frost-covered canteen was obviously freezing cold even without touching it. Gentric carefully poured the chilled beer into the pot, taking care not to let it go flat.
“Amazing. Mr. Gentric, you know magic too?”
I said admiringly. It wasn't astonishing enough to make a huge fuss over, but it was impressive that old man Gentric, an Iron-class warrior, could use magic.
After pouring out all the beer, Gentric answered proudly.
“A superior warrior knows how to wield magic too.”
A superior warrior (Iron-class).
What a fucking awesome phrase. Come to think of it, this old man was the type to spout bullshit every now and then.
─Not a dog bastard, but a bug bastard!
Fuck, I still remember that. When I'd gone apeshit at the cricket-bug bastards in the sewer, he'd said that shit. His expression had been so fucking serious that I couldn't tell whether he was joking.
“The higher one’s level, the less meaningful it becomes to distinguish between warriors and mages. I hear there are warriors who can cleave enemies a hundred meters away, and mages who can smash golems with their bare hands. Compared to them, a warrior who uses magic without a spell is nothing special.”
“You’re absolutely right.”
In this otherworld, warriors and mages were both, at the end of the day, professions that handled mana.
There were plenty of warriors who used magic. I didn't have to look far; I myself was a hybrid of warrior and mage. Even pure warriors had to learn techniques for sending attacks flying over long distances.
A warrior who couldn't do anything in ranged combat would have an obvious weakness, while mages probably didn't want to disgrace themselves by doing nothing but getting beaten up in close combat.
“What kind of magic is it?”
Frang asked in an interested voice. As though he had been waiting for the question, Gentric smoothly launched into an explanation.
“It’s a magic called <Freezing Hand>. It works by emitting cold from the hand. As a bonus, it also lets you handle cold things without any trouble.”
“Judging by the name, there must be an opposite magic too.”
The opposite of ice magic was fire magic.
It was one of fantasy’s universal laws.
“Of course, there’s also <Burning Hand>. I learned both of them. These two and <Water Creation> are quite useful.”
Gentric set down the beer and clenched his blue-glowing hand into a fist.
“They’re simple enough that even an ignorant old fool like me could learn them, and you don’t have to know how to use mana for casting them to be a problem. When you need a campfire, just hold firewood and recite the spell. They’re convenient, too, since you won’t feel hot or cold no matter how hot or cold it is in summer or winter.”
“Ah, with <Water Creation> too, you wouldn’t have any trouble surviving in the wild.”
As soon as I said that, a surge of anger shot through me. Fuck. If this old man, instead of that goddamn ascetic bastard Paragon, had come to the ruins-guarding quest, we wouldn't have had to shiver in the cold!
Anyway, as old man Gentric had said, the magic seemed fucking useful.
It was the same when Frang pricked herself while sewing last time. If we'd been able to use that <Burning Hand> magic or whatever, we could have sterilized the needle beforehand.
How much would Frang love it if I gently massaged her while keeping that Let It Go magic turned down on hot days?
And even without thinking in that direction, summer heat was genuinely beyond fucking awful for adventurers wearing armor.
More people would probably die of heatstroke while working in summer than would die fighting monsters. Winter? Winter was the season when people without a shitload of money died even while sitting still.
“Fighting cold with cold” was fucking bullshit. I wish pseudo-science beneath the liberal arts would get the hell out of here and into an SF novel. In that sense, that magic seemed quite useful.
“Mr. Gentric. Where did you learn that magic?”
I asked after putting the lid on the beer. Old man Gentric had said that refrigeration-and-heating magic was simple to learn, so I was considering saving up to learn it myself.
“I bought it from the Mages’ Guild. I can’t read, so someone who knew how to read it for me, but I still learned it in only a few days.”
“Oh, so how much did it cost?”
“All three spells cost 1 silver and 60 copper.”
Fuck.
I barely held back the curse trying to leap out of my mouth. That was fucking 1.6 million won. What was it, the latest-model smartphone?
I knew magic cost a fucking lot, but I hadn't expected even such low-level magic to cost that much. No wonder Tirsi had suffered under that racist, balding bastard.
“That’s expensive. How did you manage to save up that much money?”
“I bought them in a fit of youthful bravado when I was in my forties, when I still had plenty of vigor. I bought them by pooling money with my companions, so I didn’t pay the whole amount myself.”
Gentric chuckled as he described his forties as a time when he had possessed plenty of vigor.
“I’ve used them for over ten years, so I certainly got my money’s worth. Seeing how interested you are, I take it you’d like to learn them too.”
“Hnnng…. To be blunt, I do, but I think I’ll give up. Unlike money, you don’t die just because you lack magic. Winter’s coming soon, and if I waste my money and then freeze to death, I won’t even make a funny story.”
Let’s give up this winter. It wasn't as though all the stock would be gone just because I didn't buy one right away. But Frang tugged lightly on my blanket at those words.
“Nord. If you want to buy it, should I chip in a little too?”
“No, you don’t have to. If I still really want it later, I’ll think about it again after winter.”
Because if the discomfort index rose in summer, Frang and I might end up bickering too.
The reason I hadn’t killed myself while playing graduate student in midsummer had a lot to do with the air-conditioning-like magical device at Carmine University. It would be a luxury to expect every inn room in Sargadis to have an air conditioner like a motel, so we’d need at least some magic like that.
So I could enjoy being pressed up pleasantly against Frang again this summer. I should at least learn <Freezing Hand> separately. If all three cost 160 copper, then one would probably cost around 50 copper.
Just then, Gentric said as he closed the canteen’s stopper.
“Hey. Did you know? Depending on how you go about it, there’s actually a way to get it cheaply.”
“Huh?”
A way to get it cheaply?
What could it be? Fuck, that was tempting as hell. Seeing me eagerly bite at the bait, Gentric took a rolled-up piece of paper from inside his clothes.
“The Mages’ Guild carefully selects the magic it sells to people who aren’t guild members. In other words, they don’t say anything even if the person who bought the spellbook resells it.”
What Gentric had taken out was a spellbook transcribed on a sheet of paper about the size of an A4 page, with writing on both sides.
…No way. Was this old man seriously…?
“Wishing you luck on your journey ahead, I’ll let you have it for the special price of only 10 copper.”
……
I fell silent like a young adventurer-in-the-making who had just discovered there was nothing at the end of the rainbow, then spoke.
“……Frang. Lend me 2 copper.”
“……Wait. I want to learn it too, so I’ll pay half.”
And so we were completely bewitched by Black Gentric Day’s magic of a discount exceeding 90 percent.
Me, 5 copper. Frang, 5 copper. Ten copper in total.
Jingle jingle─.
After accepting and checking the 10 copper, Gentric handed us the paper containing the instructions for learning the magic with a kindly expression.
“Ho ho. Here you are. Just remember, if you say later that you couldn’t learn it and ask for a refund, I won’t be able to give you one.”
“Ah, yes.”
He probably said that because we could lie about not having learned it after learning it.
The lightness of a 100,000-won textbook left me unsure whether to take this positively or regard him as a resale scalper.
So after my facial muscles creaked like crazy, I eventually asked only this:
“How much have you made from this?”
“Try selling it yourselves. Then you’ll know.”
Good grief, fuck. Heavenly God, have mercy.
At that point, I was almost starting to feel respect. When I fell silent, Gentric chuckled and walked away.
“Enjoy your meal! You’ve got work tomorrow too, so get plenty of sleep!”
A person who’d made money had an incredibly light step. Frang and I saw Gentric off to his tent, then silently poured the beer into our glasses and knocked it back in one shot.
They say even hell is a place where people live.
No matter how harsh the world was, I supposed people found some way to survive.
***
About an hour later, we finished eating.
Fortunately, Frang didn’t get knocked out after just one glass of beer. Still, perhaps she was sleepy, because she rubbed her eyes and said,
“Nord, sorry. I’m going to bed first….”
“Okay. Sleep well. I’ll stay out a little longer, then come in.”
“Yeah…. Thank you. I love you.”
Since I was answering without turning around while reviewing the contents of the spellbook, Frang came up beside me, wrapped her arms around my neck, and kissed my cheek.
─Smooch!
Wow! We’d gone and offered even our first cheek kiss to our Frang! Fuck, Nord was so fucking happy! With a flushed face, Frang whispered hazily beside my ear.
“Our Nord is the coolest when he’s concentrating….”
“Thanks to you, I think all my concentration is about to fly away.”
“Hehe. I distracted you. Good luck studying.”
After saying that, Frang, whose body heat was more pleasant than the campfire’s, pulled away from me and entered the tent.
─Sway, sway.
Plop─.
“Huuuuh….”
After a sound like a balloon deflating, Frang, covered by the blanket, became completely motionless. She’d get cold if I left her alone for too long. I’d finish quickly, go inside, and sleep while holding her.
─Flutter flutter.
I put the paper away and went over the magic again.
Just as old man Gentric had said, it was easy magic. You only had to recite the name of the spell. It was a short incantation almost on the same level as Beast Regression.
It was even easier because no runes appeared. Of course, drunk Frang ultimately couldn’t learn it and went off to bed.
“──<Burning Hand>.”
Fwoosh….
When I recited the spell, my right hand burst into red flame. It looked as though my hand had transformed into a red-flavored LED lamp.
“This is a piece of cake.”
I rubbed my hand a little, then picked up a piece of firewood. My skin felt exactly as usual, but the wood gradually heated up and caught fire.
Fwoosh─.
But why the hell was the firepower so weak? It was practically lighter-level. Frowning, I used the ice magic on my other hand.
“<Freezing Hand>.”
Crack….
See? Even the sound effect was completely unimpressive.
What the fuck was with that feeble sound, like the bladder of an old man with incontinence? I sighed, cast the other spell on my other hand, then touched the firewood with the hand where <Freezing Hand> was active──
─Scorch!
“Ow, fuck, hot!”
Startled, I pulled my hand away. My right hand had been coated in fire resistance by <Burning Hand>, so it was fine even when touching burning firewood, but the left hand couldn’t overcome the heat of the flames despite the cold flowing through it.
It was because the magic’s cold wasn’t strong enough to withstand the flames.
“Fuck this. Is it an Ice type? Does it take double damage?”
I survived by pulling my hand away before it touched the fire. I kneaded my stinging hand to cool it, then tossed the burning firewood onto the campfire.
─Crackle, crackle.
I watched the campfire and dispelled the magic.
Why the hell was the magic’s output so low?
It couldn’t be because Gentric had more mana than I did. The cause was probably that I couldn’t properly control magic. Even if activating it was simple, controlling its output with mana seemed to require some knack.
I already knew how to handle mana, but this felt slightly different.
My mana was being sucked somewhere outside my body—probably into the magic’s formula—but the sensation was extremely stiff and cramped.
Like sticking a finger into an undeveloped anus!
‘Everything really does depend on getting properly developed.’
It seemed to be because this magic was unfamiliar to me.
It seemed similar to how even at a taekwondo gym, they taught you to stretch your legs before teaching you to kick. Things like this couldn't be solved overnight.
I’d learn it slowly. If you forced your legs apart during stretching, you’d fuck up your ligaments and leg muscles so badly that you’d have lasting damage for life, wouldn’t you?
The cause seemed to be that my mana control was lacking where magic was concerned. Once I got used to it someday, I’d be able to use even difficult magic.
“Good grief. This is pointless.”
I muttered as I folded the spellbook Gentric had given me. It felt like my list of goals kept growing while I accomplished nothing. In the end, the only things I had to do were rank up as an adventurer and write my paper.
Anyway, it was late at night now. Time to go to sleep.
“Let all things become ash. <Water Creation>.”
Trickle, trickle….
Hissssss….
I fired my Hydro-Incontinence Pump and put out the campfire.
Just in case, I also checked that no embers remained. If an ember spread to the field and recreated the Korean tradition of playing with fire in a field, this would become Re: Starting Life in Another World from Slavery. I cleaned up so our camping gear wouldn’t get stolen, then entered the tent.
“……Huuuuh….”
Frang was sleeping soundly. It was pitiful to see her curled up as though she were cold.
Since it was pitiful, I had to warm her up. I slipped under the blanket and hugged Frang from behind. My hands kneaded Frang’s breasts with an instinct exactly like a salmon swimming upstream against a waterfall.
─Clack clack.
This texture is definitely tanned leather armor.
Good grief, my meticulously prepared girlfriend. She was sleeping in her leather armor. I had to take mine off because it was iron armor, but Frang apparently just slept in hers.
But who was I?
I was Nord, the otherworld’s macho man.
“A man who never gives up.”
Squish─.
Knead knead─.
My hands stroked and kneaded soft flesh. Where? Her butt. I didn’t know about anywhere else, but the butt was safe. That was stipulated by international law.
Squish squish─.
Knead knead knead─.
“Hahahahehehihihoho.”
The laughter, the laughter just wouldn’t stop!
Rather than contemplating the utterly meaningless history of this otherworld, this sort of thing suited my temperament. If I had been a Franologist instead of an archaeologist, I’d have gone beyond a PhD and become the chairman of a university board.
The Nord University Department of Frang Studies.
The ultimate university where I alone was the student, professor, and chairman.
I’d work graduate students to death, dump all my living expenses and paper-writing on them, and live happily ever after.
But at some point, my heart overflowing with pleasure became steeped in regret. This happy dream would end when morning came tomorrow.
Why do people have to eat to live?!
Fuck, I don’t want to work!
I just want to spend the rest of my life in a huge house, kneading Frang and being kneaded by Frang!
─Stroke.
That was when it happened. As I lamented life’s tragedies, I shuddered at the hand stroking my suffering dick. The dickaconda suffering inside my constricting leather pants danced for joy like a rutting male that had encountered a female.
Stare─.
Looking into my arms, I saw Frang staring intently at me with crescent-shaped eyes.
“…I haven’t even washed today. Do you still want to touch me?”
“Yes.”
Sorry for waking you. But I really couldn’t hold back.
Please think of it as the price she had to pay for acting cute. It was Frang’s fault. She was sexy even when she did nothing, and she’d seduced me while hamming it up on top of that. This was an unavoidable consequence.
“You only smell good to me.”
“Hmph…. Nord is an idiot.”
─Smooch.
Slrrrp….
Even while speaking sulkily, Frang shared a deep kiss with me.
Maybe because I’d brushed my teeth, it tasted slightly refreshing.