Chapter 48
Rustle.
Rustle.
Geum Taeyang immediately tore open the boxes the computer and microphone had come in and started setting everything up.
"L-Lord Geum Taeyang...? W-we'll do that for you!"
"Oh, no you don't. What exactly do you plan to do with hands covered in semen? Go wash up first."
The enforcers saw what he was doing and rushed over in alarm to set up the computer themselves, but Geum Taeyang blocked their way.
These were women who had been lying unconscious with his semen smeared over every inch of their bodies.
They had slept so deeply they hadn't even noticed the delivery arrive, and their hands were still thick with the stuff. No way was he letting them touch an expensive computer and microphone!
After shoving the enforcers into the bathroom, Geum Taeyang set up the computer with practiced ease.
He knew computers well enough to have handled server management at a game company, so setup took no time at all.
"All right, let's go make an account."
Once the setup was done, Geum Taeyang went straight to a streaming site and created a new ID.
[Please enter your sex : Male]
[Confirm that your sex is male? False information may result in the state deploying the military to arrest you. You may not retain an attorney, you may not remain silent, and none of your human rights will be observed. Do you wish to continue?]
"... What?"
Geum Taeyang stared at the window that had popped up in front of him, dumbfounded.
No attorney, no right to silence, no human rights. Absurdly brutal treatment for the simple crime of lying about being a man.
And on top of that, the army would be sent out to drag him away.
What happened to someone taken away under conditions like those?
[Please upload a photograph of your identification card. This is a temporary measure; a company executive will visit in person with state officials to verify your identity.]
He moved to the next step, and another blood-curdling notice rose up.
Geum Taeyang ignored it and kept clicking through.
"Argh!! Stop popping up already!!"
Every time he dismissed one warning and moved to the next stage, another appeared.
Just how serious a felony was impersonating a man in this world?
He couldn't even guess. Was it more dangerous than murder, than dealing drugs?
[Welcome, Lord Geum Taeyang! Here at AsiaTV we are always devoted to providing the finest service for our Male Lords!]
Only after clearing that whole gauntlet did Geum Taeyang finish his account, and he started the broadcast at once.
He didn't turn on a webcam the way other male streamers did. He hadn't even bought one to begin with.
[A team composed of the finest managers has been added for the Male Lord!]
The instant the broadcast went live, five people filed in wearing manager tags.
-Moderator 1 : Greetings, sir!
-Moderator 2 : It is truly an honor!
The managers slammed their heads down along with their greetings.
MaleStreamLover : ooh a new Male Lord (has been banned)
At the same moment, a viewer who'd wandered in the instant she saw it was a male stream was cut down by a ban clean as a knife stroke.
"Hold on. Why did you just ban that viewer?"
Moderator 3 : She dared to type in chat without the Male Lord's permission. She should be grateful she isn't being sued for disrespect...!
Smack!
Geum Taeyang slapped his own forehead.
Had anyone ever seen such lunatics.
-oh! a male stream! (has been banned)
-helloo (has been banned)
-^ (has been banned)
While Geum Taeyang sat there flustered, over a hundred people were banned in a blink.
"S-stop!!"
Moderator 1 : Wow... that voice... (has been banned)
They showed no mercy even to the moderator who, startled by his shout, had typed something strange without meaning to.
In an instant the managers dropped from five to four. In that same instant another hundred-odd were banned as well.
"No—quit spraying bans everywhere! All of you, get out!! This is my broadcast! I've had enough of this...!"
Geum Taeyang kicked every last one of the managers out.
Of all the ridiculous things.
"Hang on, I'm going to unban everyone who got banned."
Geum Taeyang clicked away with his mouse, lifting the bans one after another.
-wow... your voice is so good!!
-so this is what a real man's voice sounds like
-what mic are you using?!
The people who had been watching him warily started typing, and the chat window began scrolling faster than his eyes could follow.
'A hundred thousand people?!'
Only five minutes since he went live, and word had already spread; people were pouring in from every direction.
For a male stream, that was par for the course.
And since this was a rookie's debut, the interest only swelled larger.
There was a saying, wasn't there.
Just as they said—a male streamer's peak is the day he debuts.
Crowds always turned out to see a male streamer making his debut.
On that first day they sized him up, and only if he matched their taste did they become regulars who watched faithfully from then on.
But where that many people gathered, trolls inevitably followed.
[ManLover donated 100,000 won!]
-that voice is making my uterus fucking tremble....
Sexual harassment directed at a man.
These days harassment on that level might not warrant detention, but it carried a fine of three million won at minimum and up to a hundred million.
She had sent a mere hundred thousand won, but in practice this was a three-million-won piece of harassment at minimum.
-you crazy bitch!
-god, read the room.
-you trying to get another male stream shut down?
-as a fellow woman I'm ashamed
-Lord Taeyang... we aren't anything like that one...
"Ah... ManLover. Thanks for the hundred thousand. And thanks for liking my voice enough to make your uterus tremble."
-?!
-?!
-????
-what's happening?
But rather than threatening charges, Geum Taeyang had offered his thanks.
The chat window plunged into total panic.
A Male Lord heard filth like that and thanked her instead of suing?
It was unbelievable.
[ManLover sent 1,000 won]
-fuck, I knew it. Listen, bitch. You think running your voice through a magic modulator makes anyone believe you're a man lol already reported you to the police. Enjoy your life.
And so ManLover reported her to the police on the spot.
Operating under a false claim of being a man was plainly illegal.
It was, in fact, a horrific felony.
"I-I really am a man, though?"
But the impostor on the broadcast seemed set on insisting she was a man to the bitter end.
[Your report has been received. We will dispatch police immediately to verify.]
Still, a little patience and that streamer's mask would come off.
-quit lying!!
-like a man would ever allow sexual harassment like that?
-and where did all the chat moderators go?
[This is an AsiaTV administrator. We have also filed a police report and are verifying the matter on our end.]
ManLover wasn't the only one who had gone to the police.
AsiaTV had filed one too, to determine whether the broadcast was using a stolen copy of Geum Taeyang's identification card.
"Yes. Chief Park Hana speaking."
"Chief. We've received simultaneous reports that someone is running an internet broadcast while impersonating a man."
"Haa... I'll head out immediately. Get the tactical response unit ready. Have you contacted the military?"
"Yes. They've agreed to detach one division."
"Good."
Park Hana finished preparing at once and set out in her personal vehicle.
"How are there so many bitches committing violent crimes like this lately..."
It didn't rise to the level of the horrific crime committed against Geum Taeyang, but impersonating a man was a grave felony in its own right.
What on earth was behind this recent run of serious crime...
"This is the place, Chief Park Hana."
"...? This is my house."
The place they finally arrived at, military in tow, was the very home Chief Park Hana had left that morning after finding the enforcers passed out.
Chk-chk!!
The moment she said it, the division commander who had brought the army leveled her gun at her.
Her subordinates trained their weapons on Park Hana as well.
Not that gun barrels were going to frighten Park Hana, who had reached the level of a Transcendent.
"Chief Park Hana. Am I to take that to mean you have a connection to this criminal?"
"No..."
Park Hana let out a sigh.
She had a good idea of what had happened. Women had clearly filed reports because Geum Taeyang behaved like no man of this world ever would.
"Shouldn't we start by confirming who's actually broadcasting?"
Beep beep beep.
Park Hana punched in the passcode and stepped inside, and what met the eyes of the tactical unit and the division commander behind her was Geum Taeyang, shouting in a fury.
"I'm telling you, I am a man...!! Why won't you believe me?!"
-lol a man behaving like this just doesn't make sense
-what man says thank you when someone tells him her uterus is trembling
-he'd cuss her out and ban her on the spot lol
"So I'm supposed to cuss out a viewer who donated a hundred thousand won?"
"Taeyang!!"
"Huh? Noona. What's this all of a sudden..."
Mid-shout, Geum Taeyang felt his headset pulled from his ears, and he turned at the sound of Park Hana calling his name.
Police and soldiers stood there with weapons in hand, staring blankly.
Geum Taeyang, meanwhile, wore nothing but jeans and a white tee cut so far open at the sides that his armpits were fully bared.
And since he'd just worked himself into a heat, sweat had plastered the shirt to him until it didn't merely show off his build—his nipples were faintly poking through...!!
"A-are you Lord Geum Taeyang?"
"Yeah, that's me. Here's my ID."
As if to say he wanted no part of the hassle, Geum Taeyang pulled out his ID and showed it to them.
"Gasp... i-it's a real Male Lord."
"An actual Male Lord..."
"W-we're so sorry!!"
Exactly as in the scene at the police station on his first day in this world, every one of them dropped to their knees before him and bowed their heads low.
"... Well, the broadcast's ruined."
[The broadcast has ended.]
Geum Taeyang's debut broadcast had run into every problem imaginable and come to an end after a mere thirty minutes.