Chapter 9
There you go.
Yangyang lifted both of Rubedo's arms.
She lathered up a bath sponge and washed Rubedo's arms, working downward.
Rubedo didn't resist…… More precisely, once she'd been dragged into the bathroom, she'd realized resistance was pointless and meekly accepted Yangyang's touch.
Armpits first.
The bath sponge carefully cleaned the smooth skin, free of even a single hair.
Next, her breasts.
Her breasts hadn't developed with puberty yet; their…… charms could only be appreciated by touch, but her vigorous resistance made that impossible.
Her sides and stomach.
Yangyang thoroughly washed from Rubedo's back, where she couldn't reach, down to her navel.
Her private parts, then her legs.
She cleaned her backside with a finger, then washed down her thighs and calves.
Finally, her feet.
Whenever Rubedo lifted one foot, Yangyang wiped the sole and rubbed between her toes.
"Good."
She rinsed the suds off Rubedo with water.
"Head down. That's it."
Rubedo bent her head so her hair fell forward, and Yangyang first rinsed away any dirt with water.
She squeezed shampoo onto her hair, scrubbed her scalp with her fingers to work up a lather, and moved down the length of it.
Once the lather had reached the tips, she rinsed it out and repeated the process once more.
"Remember how to wash long hair? All right, now let's dry it."
Yangyang fetched a towel, wiped the water running down Rubedo's body, then squeezed the water from her hair.
Whirrrrr.
Warm air tickled Rubedo's scalp.
At last, she had a chance to speak. She brought up the words she'd been holding inside all this time.
"Um, Lieutenant?"
"I told you to call me big sis."
"But, as you know, I used to be a man……"
The hand gently smoothing her hair came to a stop.
"I've only been a woman for two days…… I don't even remember why I became one…… And it still feels so strange that I'm dying of embarrassment……"
Yangyang chuckled softly at her babbling.
"Rubedo, do you know how many people are reported missing each day?"
"What?"
"People whose deaths haven't been confirmed. More precisely, cases where the faint signal emitted by their brain chips disappears from the universe."
"Uh……"
Why was she suddenly asking that?
What did it have to do with their conversation?
The questions in Rubedo's mind showed plainly on her face, giving her a rather dumbfounded expression.
"At least 150, as many as 400. Hundreds of people disappear from the universe every day, and we still haven't figured out why. Do you understand what that means?"
"……?"
"The man named Rubedo, who resurrected Mijeong, no longer exists in this world. Without your memories, no one can know anything about his face, age, voice, or even his life."
Yangyang's hand moved from Rubedo's scalp down toward her waist.
"So it's not strange for me to treat you like a girl. Yes, of course I know you used to be a man. So what? The person I met is this adorable, lovely little girl."
She played with Rubedo's hair for a moment, then focused on drying it again.
'My past self became someone who had never existed.'
Yangyang fell silent, and Rubedo sank into thought.
'I remember myself clearly, so can I really say I don't exist? My name is Rubedo. Mijeong's power turned me into a woman, and when I was a man…… Huh?'
I can't remember.
What kind of person was I?
What did I look like?
How old was I?
What did I like?
……I can't remember anything.
Was this another price for using Mijeong's power?
'What…… am I, anyway?'
The more she thought, the more confused she became.
Her mind was shouting at her.
Don't think about it anymore.
Just accept reality.
She was growing tired of trying to recall her past.
It no longer mattered what her old self had been like, and a desire to enjoy the life of the girl she'd been given began to well up inside her.
When she gave in to that feeling, she felt happy.
"……You're right, Lieutenant. According to the database, Mijeong alters reality. The man I was disappears, and I become someone who was a girl from the very beginning."
"……"
"I, Rubedo, was a girl from the very beginning……"
"That's not true. Get a hold of yourself."
At Yangyang's words, the fog clouding Rubedo's mind cleared in an instant.
The voice urging her to stop thinking faded from her ears, and she felt as if some of her memories had returned.
"When you stand at a crossroads where you might lose yourself, never abandon who you are. Losing 'yourself' is more horrifying than you can imagine. Besides, don't you remember? Our mission is to recover your memories, as ordered by the Earth Emperor."
"……Lieutenant, what is the Emperor to you, anyway? To be honest, neither you nor I—not even anyone else in the universe—knows what kind of person the Emperor is. For that matter, is the Emperor even human? No matter how much technology has extended our lifespans, people can't live for 300 years. Doesn't it frighten you to follow the word of such an unknown being without question?"
"The Emperor. The Emperor, huh……"
This time, Yangyang was the one who fell into thought.
She pondered the Emperor, then pondered herself.
She quickly reached a conclusion and gave her answer.
"He's just like a mythical creature. A dragon or a kirin. I follow the Emperor only because that old geezer Ramirez follows him so devotedly. I may not trust the Emperor, but I trust that old geezer."
"Brigadier General Ramirez? ……You can't make someone else your reason."
"No. Sometimes you have to know how to lean on someone else."
The airflow from the hair dryer stopped.
Rubedo's soft, dry hair swayed under Yangyang's fingertips.
"All done. How does it feel? Nice and fluffy?"
Just as she'd said.
Her thoroughly dried hair was soft and warm.
The feel of it against the back of her neck and her waist was unfamiliar, yet pleasant.
"With hair that long, it'll be hard for you to wash and dry it by yourself. I can manage, but a cute little girl needs to stay clean. I'll help you wash it from time to time."
"……Lieutenant, no."
Rubedo squeezed her eyes shut, then let out a long sigh as if she'd made up her mind.
"……Big sis."
She set their form of address straight.
"My mind is still that of a man. But my body is a woman's. The past shapes the present, but if I lose the present, I can't exist. From now on, just as you said, I won't be consumed by my past self. But I have no intention of forgetting who I used to be, either. I'll live fully in the present, and I'll recover my past—my memories."
She held out her pinky finger.
"This is a 'promise.' If I ever seem like I'm about to break it, then, as an adult, please set me straight."
She redefined herself.
No longer an adult she couldn't remember, but a child.
At the sight of her accepting the present, Yangyang……
"All right. It's a promise."
She smiled and hooked their pinkies together, then pressed their thumbs against each other.
"Oh, and one more thing."
"What is it?"
"I think…… some of my memories have come back."
It was good news.
…….
…….
…….
Time flew by.
Rubedo and the others spent two whole weeks lazing around, and those two weeks were an unprecedented oasis of peace.
"In the end, the garrison never attacked us."
"Isn't that a relief? I hope nothing happens before we reach the Furnace."
"That won't happen unless Fettuccine's Marshal is an idiot."
Aboard the spaceship bound for the Furnace, they chatted together.
Given its destination, the ship's main passengers were poor laborers rather than tourists.
They were seated in the premium section, where ordinary laborers could only dream of sitting, so they could talk without worrying their conversation would be overheard.
"That's what I mean. If the Marshal's going to make a move, now would be the best time…… Surely he wouldn't really blow up a spaceship packed with laborers?"
"It's not impossible. First, if a spaceship explodes in space, even Federation soldiers can't survive for long without protection. And sadly, from an objective standpoint, if killing three Federation soldiers costs the lives of only a few dozen laborers, that's a bargain."
Most importantly……
"It would be easy to cover up. They could give it some name like the Whatever Disaster and sweep it under the rug. In the end, it's a highly efficient way to deal with us."
Their conversation bloomed, but its thorns were as sharp as a rose's.
But it was true.
After grueling training and body-enhancement surgeries, every Federation soldier was a precision killing machine.
Their value was impossible to calculate in money, and even if you put ten truckloads of civilians on the scales, the side with a single soldier would still be heavier.
"That's why we spent two weeks lazing around. If anything unexpected happens, we can use Mijeong's power to get through it."
"You have too much faith in me."
The chirping-bird voice that had been flowing from Rubedo's mouth gave way to a sound like fingernails scraping sandpaper.
Mijeong was speaking through her.
The group was somewhat startled by the rare sight of two voices coming from one mouth.
"No being in this world is omnipotent. That includes us."
"Even if you're not omnipotent, you're capable."
"No power comes without a price. The life-forms of 170 years ago didn't know that."
"I can overcome losing my memories with my own power."
She began talking to herself.
"Though I forgot both how I resurrected you and the fact that I had resurrected you, I've recently recovered some memories from before I became a little girl."
"Oh?"
"I…… think I used to like buntings."
"What's a bunting?"
"I don't know, either. What is a bunting, anyway? I don't even know if it's a creature's name or a word for an action. It's embarrassing that I don't know anything. But the important thing is that I've managed to recall at least some of the memories I lost as the price."
Seeing how much brighter and more confident she seemed, Kang Chanwoo leaned over and whispered to Yangyang.
"What on earth happened in the bathroom? Ever since that day, Miss Rubedo's been a completely different person. It's much nicer to see her like this, though……"
"Heh, big sis and little sis made a promise."
"A promise…… That's a wonderful thing. In that case, Lieutenant, would you make a promise with me, too?"
"What is it?"
Without a moment's hesitation, he smacked Yangyang on the back of the head.
"No violence."
Thwack.
Despite having just called for no violence, Yangyang's fist landed.
As befit the Federation's elite soldiers, they engaged in a high-level hand-to-hand fight even while seated.
"If you use my power again, I don't know which memories will disappear, or how many."
"I'm not afraid."
"Memories are precious. Please cherish the privilege of being a living thing."
"That's why I'm going to get back the memories I've lost."
…….
The parasite in Rubedo's brain fell silent.
The only sounds in the premium cabin were Yangyang and Kang Chanwoo trading blows.
The spaceship, carrying this cheerful moment with it,……
Soon took off with a deafening roar.
And then……
It crashed before it had even left Fettuccine's gravity well.
At an altitude of 63,000 meters.