Chapter 31
“Ugh! I’m still sticky! Wasn’t changing clothes pointless, then? It feels like I’m wearing two pairs of underwear……”
“Hmm, but the clothes you were wearing are completely ruined now, Yubel. There’s nothing we can do about it! Besides, you look really pretty right now!”
“Haa…… Let’s just drop it.”
In the end, Yubel changed into that perverted bikini armor.
The slime’s ooze contained a substance that melted clothes, leaving his leather tunic full of holes. He didn’t have much choice.
At least the bikini Riella had prepared fit Yubel perfectly, as if it had been made for him.
Well, you could call that a blessing in disguise.
“Hahaha…… Just hang in there a little longer. Looks like we’ll reach the kingdom by tomorrow.”
Se-on was completely exhausted.
Since Yubel had stubbornly refused to wear the bikini, Se-on had used every ounce of his strength to persuade him to change into it.
His clothes were melting away until he’d be left wearing nothing but his underwear, and Se-on couldn’t understand what Yubel disliked so much.
He was unbelievably stubborn.
‘I’m down to just my pants now, too……’
Se-on grumbled to himself.
Whether he liked it or not, Yubel absolutely hated this perverted outfit.
He was a man—a real man among men—and even if he had no choice but to wear women’s underwear now, wasn’t wearing a bikini too embarrassing?!
Yubel found this situation utterly humiliating.
Once they reached the Kingdom of Tiranis, he’d buy some clothes right away.
But before that…
“Haa…… It’s so stifling I could die. There’s no sunlight in the carriage, so why is it this hot!”
“I’m hot too!” “Kyao!”
“You’re right. I didn’t expect it to get this hot. Is it summer right now?”
The carriage was practically an oven.
They’d left the carriage out in the blazing sun while they went into the dungeon, so of course it had turned into a piping-hot sauna.
The horses pulling the carriage had gotten overheated, too, and were plodding along slowly.
Hot, slow, and stifling—it was the perfect means of transportation to drive a person insane.
“Ugh! Eva, let me borrow you for a second.”
“K-Kyao? Kyaooo!!”
Unable to stand the sticky feeling of sweat running down his body, Yubel started using Eva to wipe it off.
Every nook and cranny of his body. His neck, armpits, cleavage, thighs, and even his crotch.
And so Eva was reduced to nothing more than a towel for soaking up Yubel’s sweat.
“Phew…… Haa…… I finally feel a little better. Are you okay, Eva? I couldn’t help it.”
“Kyaooo……♡”
As for why Yubel was using Eva as a towel…
It was because dragon scales were somehow cool to the touch, making the heat seem to fade wherever they touched him and leaving him with a refreshing feeling.
However, the sight was enough to make anyone watching instinctively cross their legs.
In fact, the adventurers in the other carriages were looking at Yubel with even more lustful eyes now.
“Big brother, I think I’ve been alive just for this day……”
“Hup, how could such a lovely lady……? I don’t think I can be satisfied with my wife anymore!”
“Get a hold of yourself. That poor woman……”
Only Hans, who’d witnessed Se-on’s misdeeds in the dungeon, kept his eyes tightly shut and refused to look at Yubel.
And in his heart, he was thinking of spreading the truth throughout the kingdom.
That the Hero they’d believed in had fallen. That if things continued like this, he’d be chasing women around instead of confronting the Demon King.
That was what he planned to say.
The sight Hans had witnessed had been cruel and shocking beyond belief.
That was why Hans squeezed his eyes shut and absolutely refused to look at Yubel.
A furtive glance.
Absolutely……
Another furtive glance.
Hmm……
“Big brother. Why do you live like this?”
“W-What! H-Hey, you brat! What have I done?! What do you take me for? After all I’ve done raising you—”
Hans burst into a heated protest.
That’s right. Hans was a man, too.
How was anyone supposed to resist that?
Whoosh.
“Oh.” “Ah.”
While Hans was bickering with his younger brothers and enjoying the view, a canopy was put up around the carriage carrying the Hero’s party.
A carriage used by mere adventurers had a canopy? It was more luxurious than he’d expected.
But at that moment, he could only resent the splendid carriage.
“Damn it, the Hero finally covered it up! Daaamn!”
“Ugh, good things should be shared! Hero! How are we supposed to live now?!”
“Damn it……”
Hans and his younger brothers wept.
Meanwhile, Se-on, who’d put up the canopy because he didn’t like the adventurers’ gazes, was trying to calm Yubel, who was about to die of heat.
“Hey! It’s hot enough to kill me already, so why are you blocking the breeze, too!”
“Sorry…… Just bear with it a little longer……”
“Jeez!”
Thump.
Yubel, who’d lunged at him, irritably plopped back down in his seat.
And everyone there understood how Yubel felt.
“Eeh, I’m hot too!” “Kyaooo!”
“S-Sorry…… Haha……”
Even Riella and Eva complained about Se-on putting up the canopy.
All Se-on could do was smile awkwardly.
‘But I can’t help it.’
When Se-on realized people were looking at Yubel that way, it made his insides twist.
But even Se-on himself didn’t know exactly where this feeling came from.
It was the fate of someone romantically clueless, who’d never been in love back on Earth.
Still, Se-on had a little sense about these things.
He’d started wondering whether this was really the sort of feeling one had for a companion.
With that thought, Se-on lifted his head and looked at Yubel.
He was puffing out his cheeks in a sulk, apparently because the carriage was hot.
At the sight, Se-on’s heart began beating faster without him realizing it.
“Hey, what are you looking at?”
“N-Nothing!”
Yubel sighed and looked away.
Se-on flinched at the gesture.
Why am I acting like this?
And yet, today Yubel seemed even sexier than usual to Se-on.
Was it because he was wearing a bikini?
That was probably part of it, but it seemed to have started when Yubel had thrown himself into danger to survive in the dungeon.
But Se-on found that incredibly strange.
It seemed like no one else there had noticed, but he’d seen it with his own eyes.
A pair of ominous black wings had appeared behind Yubel, and he’d flown toward them at high speed.
So Se-on decided to sound Yubel out.
“Yubel. Just before we escaped the dungeon, how did you suddenly fly over at that speed? Even I had trouble following you with my eyes.”
“Huh? What are you talking about all of a sudden? Didn’t you bring me along at the end?”
“Huh? You don’t remember? You flew over……”
“What are you talking about? I don’t remember that. I’m not a bird, so how could I fly? Say something that makes sense.”
“Uh, no, well……”
Did I see it wrong?
No. Yubel had definitely spread black wings like a demon and flown toward the escape room.
He was sure of it. He hadn’t taken his eyes off Yubel for even a moment.
Then why didn’t Yubel remember?
Had something like this happened before, too……?
Se-on sometimes got this sense of déjà vu whenever he talked to Yubel.
A few days after setting out on an adventure with Yubel to defeat the Demon King,
Yubel had used a popular catchphrase that Se-on himself had only heard back on Earth. He had no idea where Yubel had picked it up.
Curious, Se-on had asked him a little later where he’d heard it, but Yubel had reacted as if he’d never heard the phrase before.
“……”
Se-on suddenly felt a chill run down his spine.
It absolutely hadn’t seemed like he was pretending.
Yubel wasn’t good at acting, after all.
At first, Se-on had thought he was just forgetful. But this felt fundamentally different.
It was as though someone were gradually devouring his memories.
An unsettling feeling like that.
“Kya, kyao!”
“Huh? Ah, right, it’s that time? Good timing. I was getting a little thirsty.”
Hmm?
Yubel supported Eva with both hands and brought her close to his face.
The inexplicable action caught Riella and Se-on’s attention.
The members of the Hero’s party watched Yubel closely, their gazes asking, ‘What is he about to do?’
At that very moment.
“Ah……”
Trickle——
A clear, bright yellow stream landed right in Yubel’s mouth.
The stream shot out forcefully and showed no sign of stopping.
Yubel’s small throat bobbed up and down nonstop as he gulped it down.
That was the sight Se-on and Riella were watching.
Wh-What? Huh? Whaaaaat!?
“What are you doing right nowww!!!!!”
“Gah!?”
“K-Kyaot!”
Startled by Se-on’s reaction, Yubel dropped Eva while he was drinking her pee.
And since Eva kept peeing after she fell, her urine sprayed everywhere like a sprinkler, creating a huge disaster.
A vein popped on Yubel’s forehead.
“Damn it……! W-What was that all of a sudden?!”
“That’s what I should be asking!! What the hell are you doing?!”
Yubel’s shoulders twitched at Se-on’s sudden outburst.
Then he calmly continued.
“Can’t you see? I’m drinking pee.”
“Uh, huh……? No……”
“Heh……”
Riella reacted as if her mind had already flown off to Andromeda.
Se-on was stunned for a moment, too.
That was because Yubel said it so calmly, with such an innocent expression.
For a moment, Se-on even wondered, ‘Am I the weird one here?’
Then Se-on came to his senses and continued.
“Y-Yubel. Why on earth are you doing that?”
“What? That thing I just did?”
“Yeah.”
The reason Se-on could stay calm was that
urine therapy—the idea of drinking urine to cure illnesses—existed even on Earth, his homeworld.
It was a rather bizarre treatment, though.
He waited for Yubel to explain himself.
“My mother told me to drink it?”
What?
Something he’d never imagined came out of Yubel’s mouth.
“When you’re little, you drink pee like this!”
Se-on’s expression turned serious in an instant.
So Yubel had been drinking pee since he was little? Because his mother told him to? All this time?
Se-on was too shocked to speak.
It sounded as though Yubel had spent his childhood drinking his family’s pee.
In other words, his parents might have used Yubel as a toilet—a way to vent their desires.
“Ugh……”
Riella gagged beside him.
Se-on’s stomach turned, too.
Meanwhile, Yubel was dumbfounded by their reactions.
They told me it was something you drink, and you still don’t believe me?
Honestly, some people just can’t get past their preconceptions. Tsk, tsk.
Yubel had simply repeated what Behemoth had told him—that young dragons could drink pee.
No, he’d tried to repeat it exactly.
If loser Yubel’s communication skills hadn’t been so terrible, and if the title ‘Mother’ that Behemoth had told him to use hadn’t suited Behemoth so perfectly, perhaps this disaster wouldn’t have happened.
Then Yubel lifted Eva up.
“Want to drink some with me?”
“S-Sorry! I’m going to get some fresh air!”
Riella hurriedly got out of the carriage.
“Huh? What’s wrong with her? Then, what about the Hero?”
“To think Yubel could have suffered something like that……”
The Hero was muttering something.
Everyone seemed to have gone a little crazy.
Well, they might have, since it was so hot.
It was summer.
***
Meanwhile, in a forest near the Kingdom of Tiranis.
“We’re almost there.”
A Dark Knight clad in jet-black armor
“Please wait just a little longer, my Demon King……”
was approaching.