Chapter 85
“Waaaaah!”
“How are you already down to one year...!”
“Yeah, no do-overs! It’s our turn now!”
“Finish her off, Seo Yuna! Finish her, finish her!”
“You’re bound to mess up! You’ll drop a gonggi stone!”
“Interfering won’t do you any good!”
Ever since Name taught them how to play gonggi, the game had become popular in Class 2-A during every lunch break and recess.
Children learned quickly. In a short time, they had become skilled enough to be called seasoned players without the slightest exaggeration.
Name stood a step away from the group and leisurely watched them play.
Yuna had somehow gained the children’s full trust and was carrying out her role.
The sound of children laughing always put Name in a good mood.
“Aren’t you going to play?”
After brushing her teeth, Haru sat down beside Name and asked.
“It is a little childish, like you said, isn’t it?”
“But you said you made the game.”
“I played it enough to get sick of it back in the day. When I was alone, there wasn’t much else to do besides play gonggi. It’s not like I could play cat’s cradle by myself.”
“As expected, you’re strange.”
Haru gave her a straightforward assessment. Name nodded in agreement, as if to say she might be right.
It was like this again.
It was impossible to tell whether Name was watching the children play gonggi or simply staring blankly into space.
Whenever she had that unfocused look in her eyes, Haru reminded Name of her great-grandmother, who always sat in a massage chair and gazed serenely at the distant mountains and the Han River.
“What are you thinking about?”
“Just... thinking about the old days.”
“You remember things from long ago?”
“Yeah. I even remember when I was a baby.”
Haru almost told her not to lie, but something about Name made her think it might actually be possible, so she quietly folded away her objection.
“Why did I suddenly tell you all about my family? I was even keeping it a secret from Nuri, my best friend...”
“I guess it means you wanted to confide in someone after all, even if it wasn’t me.”
“No... How could I tell someone something like that...? Even Seo Yuna was teased terribly by the other kids about it last year. For some reason, I felt like you wouldn’t do that, Name.”
Name was already known as the most mature child in the class.
Haru, who had originally filled that role, had even officially acknowledged it herself.
Haru suddenly remembered how Name had treated her before and brought it up.
“How did you do that...?”
“Do what?”
“Last time, when I collapsed on the road, you held me, right? My headache suddenly disappeared completely.”
“Ah, I used a little aura. I thought about using magic, but I didn’t know exactly what condition your body was in.”
“Aura...? Isn’t that the mana you use to strengthen your muscles?”
“There are endless ways to use it. Body-enhancing aura is the most common, but it can also be used as a substitute for psychoactive medication, like this.”
“Ugh, I don’t understand any of that...”
Mana could disrupt the body’s internal balance, even if only for an instant, when mishandled. Aura, on the other hand, coexisted with the body within the limits it could tolerate, so there was no need to worry about side effects.
Especially since benzodiazepine-based anxiolytics and antidepressants were not recommended for treating psychological trauma.
So Name’s purpose back then had been nothing more than alleviating her symptoms, not curing them.
“So what exactly are your symptoms? Does your head just throb?”
“No... I hear strange sounds. A beeping noise keeps ringing, and it makes my head hurt.”
Haru was complaining of one of the most common symptoms of auditory hallucinations.
Therefore, unless Name knew what had caused her hallucinations, there was no way to cure them.
After thinking it over carefully, Name suggested one possible solution.
“Then how about making up with Yuna first?”
“Eeeek, now?”
Haru’s expression shook violently at the unexpected suggestion.
If her symptoms were caused by acute stress disorder, then the proper approach would be to start by filling the unconscious void within her.
While Haru hesitated and avoided answering, Name moved closer.
“You said you wanted to apologize to Yuna, too.”
Haru brushed her fingers over her long hair.
The way she twisted her hair around her finger reflected her complicated feelings.
“It’s embarrassing... Yuna might not even want my apology...”
After thinking for a long while, she finally managed to speak, but her words were steeped in deep distrust.
She thought there was no way she could return to a normal relationship with a friend who had declared that they were no longer friends.
“I don’t understand. Why do people keep hating each other and doing things they’ll regret as if they’re going to live forever?”
“...? I don’t really understand what you mean.”
“On the day Yuna hit you, what did you wish would happen to Yuna?”
“Can I answer honestly...?”
“Go ahead.”
Name didn’t move at all. She simply waited for Haru’s answer with an expectant look in her eyes.
“I wished Yuna would transfer to another class... I absolutely don’t think that now, so don’t misunderstand...!”
It was the true feeling she had not wanted to reveal to anyone but Name.
Anxiety suddenly washed over her at the thought that Name might be disappointed in her after hearing it.
“You never thought, ‘I wish Yuna would just die right now’?”
Haru’s eyebrow twitched.
Name’s tone was dry, but the content of the question was extremely morbid.
“I’ve never thought anything like that!”
“Then why are you putting off apologizing? If Yuna died today and you never had the chance to apologize to her for the rest of your life, would that still be all right?”
“That’s...”
“Death always comes at an unexpected moment. To you, me, and Yuna. There’s no guarantee that we’ll have another day to face each other and talk.”
People who fought with their beloved partners, parents, or children were among the people Name found hardest to understand.
“Please don’t create something you’ll regret.”
* * *
Actually, although Name had given Haru quite a grand speech...
Name had no idea how to make two little children reconcile.
In both her previous life and the life before that, her number of relationships had always been in the single digits.
It was a sad reality that she had no grounds to dispute even if someone called her the ultimate example of a loner.
Still, Haru’s condition looked genuinely precarious. Name thought it would be best to cure whatever was wrong with her as soon as possible, and this was the only plan she had managed to come up with.
“A pajama party?”
Yuna asked, her eyes widening.
“Yeah. How about this weekend?”
“Uh. Ah. Um... I’d like that, but when will we study...?”
“We can study at my house, too. If you’re really worried, I’ll help you with the next performance assessment.”
“Wow, really? It’ll be my first time staying up all night playing at a friend’s house. I’m so excited...!”
“It won’t be just the two of us. Lee Haru will be there, too.”
“Why Lee Haru...?”
Yuna’s expression turned icy as she openly displayed her displeasure.
“It’ll be fun if we all play together.”
“Don’t you want to play with just me? Is it because I’m boring? You’re my only friend, Name... That’s why I only wrote your name on the survey, too...”
Yuna grabbed my collar and spoke with a quivering voice.
“I wrote Yuna’s name first, too.”
“Really?”
Yuna replied in a much brighter voice.
She really was a simple child. It was ironic that someone like her also ranked near the very top of the class.
“Actually, Haru said she had something to tell you, so I invited her to my house.”
“Then she could just say it here in class.”
“It sounds like it’s something serious.”
“Okay... But I’m still your best friend, right, Name? You must never forget that!”
I answered by stretching her cheeks out to either side.
This kid was so greedy...!
“Hweee.”
Still, she was innocent, so I let it slide.
“Then what should I bring? Pajamas?”
“I should bring clothes to wear the next day and toiletries like a toothbrush, right?”
“Yeah, yeah. I’ll ask Mom first and pack them! Do I need a pillow?”
“We have enough pillows and blankets at my house, so you’re fine.”
“What about a stuffed animal?”
“...If you really want to bring one, go ahead.”
“Hehe, no. Actually, even without Mr. Dolphin, I don’t think I’d be scared at night if I hugged you while I slept, Name...!”
I hadn’t given her permission to use me as a pillow, so why was she already getting ahead of herself?
If she turned out to be a restless sleeper, I planned to climb straight into my own bed.
Then I would probably get to see Yuna looking tearful the next morning, but I decided to think about that when the time came.
The real issue was whether Haru’s family would allow it, but she told me not to worry and said she would definitely come to my house this Saturday.
I should also tell Professor Cheon in advance to prepare something delicious.
The choice of menu was entirely up to the professor, but I wouldn’t compromise on dessert. It had to be crepes.
From now on, I needed to think carefully about how to help Yuna and Haru become friends.
Finally, I remembered the unavoidable task of streaming online.
As far as I knew, the terms of service included a condition that temporarily prohibited monetization if no donations were received for four weeks.
Whether I would play a game remained to be seen, but I thought I should show my face on stream at least once in the near future.