Chapter 210
『Translator: RainTL』
༺ Autumn Harvest Festival (7) ༻
“Defend yourself for the wicked act of bestiality you have committed by raping a goat.”
“...What the fuck did you say?”
What kind of bullshit was this… Defend myself for what?!
The small auditorium turned awkwardly silent. Everyone was appalled, including the contestants that had been waiting for their turn as well as Muller, who was on the opposing side of the trial.
Raping a goat…? Public Immorality? Like, we had to do a trial on this?
However, no one was able to call it nonsense, because these were all taken from actual cases that the JPs had experienced themselves.
“Before we get to the trial, we will give each side 5 minutes to check the details of the case.”
I quickly confirmed the details of the said trial.
It was an event that occurred at a small country-side village called Hamarakar. One day, Mr. Tomberra the shepherd was witnessed raping a goat in the middle of the night by the farm owner, Mr. Aleha.
JP Samantha, who had been passing nearby, oversaw the trial of the man who had been imprisoned in the village hall and gave a harsh sentence.
She gave the sentence of cutting off one of the testicles of the young man, Tomberra. It was quite a harsh punishment for immorality, but it was such a shocking case that the defendant was the only one against it.
- Oh shit…
- That’s…
All the guys who were given the documents related to the case couldn’t help but unconsciously cover their private parts.
Well… female judges did tend to be more harsh towards sexual crimes, but this sentence was still within the realm of possible punishment in this era. Unlike modern day Earth, harsh and extreme punishments like this were certainly a lot more viable.
And yet here I was, having to defend myself to be acquitted or prove my innocence in this case.
Being acquitted free of charges gives the most marks but that would be impossible because the defendant was caught red-handed in the act. And as for innocence…
Wouldn’t that be difficult?
Leaving innocent in a sexual assault case? On top of public immorality?
“Fuckk…”
“Are you okay, Boss?”
Ren, who was here as an assistant, asked after pulling her eyes away from the documents. Despite her initial astonishment, she was trying her best to scrutinize the details of the case.
“This is over. We can’t win…”
“B, but this might not be the worst. There might be worse cases…”
“Do you really think so? Can you name me three possible scenarios that are worse than this?”
“...”
She closed her mouth, unable to give a response. However, she muttered something different quietly under her breath.
“The goat might have liked it though.”
“Huh?”
“You don’t know what the animals were thinking. It might have… liked it, right?”
“...”
Despite saying that herself, Ren blushed from embarrassment. But her words gave me a clue.
“Wait. Let me go through the documents.”
I quickly confirmed the details again.
In most cases, JP trials did not last a long time. The main legal formality was the most important, and there was less regard for precedents and specific legislation, unlike the major and minor courthouses.
Because JPs had to go around the country, it was a waste of administration for them to stay glued to a single town for months. As such, they didn’t have time to investigate the matter.
That was why there could be less congruency in the verdict. Only a small fraction of information was available, which meant…
“Ren! Can you find me a clause related to this incident in Civil Law 39!?”
“Huh? Uh, okay!”
We scavenged through the thick book of legislation and quickly gathered the material.
This case…
It might be more winnable than I initially thought!
………
……
…
“Then let us begin the trial. Judge Muller. Please begin,” said Professor Edgar.
In response, Muller opened up the thick book and said.
“The defendant is alleged to have committed the act of public immorality specified in Criminal Law 255. The rape of a goat is—”
“Objection!”
“What?”
Muller seemed puzzled by my objection. He didn’t see how I could have objected to anything he had thus outlined.
However, the “word choice” was extremely important for me, so I couldn’t let it slide.
“It was not a ‘rape’. It was consensual!”
“...What the fuck did you say?”
“Objection! Judge Muller, please use proper words that are suitable in the context of this solemn occasion!”
“...Judge Muller, be aware of your word choice.”
“Ah, yes… U, understood.”
Muller shrunk a little from Professor Edgar’s words, but immediately continued his words.
“Consent? By that are you referring to an intercourse of male and female agreed upon by both parties…?”
“The goat of this incident, Ms. Merilda, was a female goat! That stays true to the definition of intercourse under consent!”
“When the heck did you come up with a name… Like fuc— Kuhum! But that is only for humans…”
“Is there a sentence stating that it has to be a ‘human’ in the book of legislation? I could not find it! Please answer me!”
“Well, obviously…”
“‘Obviously’...? Please use ‘justified’ and unbiased terminology in the court, Your Honor!”
Muller appeared greatly shaken by my constant nitpicking of his word choice. However, as expected of a peer who had listened to the same lectures as I had, he soon retaliated.
“There was no mutual consent. How can you prove that the goat has given its consent?”
“That is true. But is there any proof that there wasn’t any mutual consent?”
“Well…”
“‘Well’? Your Honor?”
“You freakin’...!”
“I, Korin Lork! Will hereby declare to the public! Ms. Merilda and I…! Were lovers!”
“What?!”
——!!
- What?!
- No way!
- He’s gone mad…!
- How badly does he want to win this…?
The audience was baffled and awe-struck by my shocking declaration. Love with an animal? It must be an unimaginably despicable thing for the people of this world.
However, this was the only move I could make to reduce my sentence. I had to win!
“You! You’re saying whatever you wish to during this trial! Can you prove yourself!?”
As if he had witnessed the most wicked and vile criminal in the world, Muller shouted in fury. Even though this was a mock trial, he must be thinking that I had crossed the line.
“I can prove it!”
“What?!”
“Your Honor! I can promise you right at this moment!”
“O, on what?”
“I will marry Miss Merilda! Please allow us to prove our love!”
- Oh dear…
- This is crazy. This is insane…
- O lord. Why are you making me listen to these horrifying words?
- KIEEEEEEEEEEEEK! This can’t be reaaaaaalll!!
- This cannot be real!
Chaos was starting to fill the crowd, but I had to push through with the initiative.
“I will pay the dowry to my father-in-law, Sir Aleha, and let him know about our decision! Please bless our love!”
“...Fuck.”
“Haa…”
In the end, Muller couldn’t hold himself back from swearing out loud again while Edgar brought his palm to his face.
Goats didn’t cost that much. If the defendant were to pay more than that as the so-called dowry, then it was highly likely that the owner of the farm would let it go. He might be appalled at how crazy of a guy the shepherd was, but that wasn’t a reason for him to ignore free profit.
“Immorality only applies to public immoral acts without consent! However, if it was a relationship formed on love! And if it was with a fiancée whom I had promised the future with, there aren’t any problems, are there?”
“Korin you fucking madman! You’re throwing too much of this random bullshit just because it’s a mock trial!”
“Your Honor! Please maintain a dignified lexicon in the court!”
“Yeah. Good for you for being a creative lunatic! Your existence itself is a minus in terms of dignity, alright?! I knew it the moment I saw you doing that Immortan Lork or whatever!”
It was becoming more and more of a disgraceful conversation towards the end but all in all, the trial ended in the way I wanted… Actually, it was better than I expected.
Proven innocent.
It was my victory.
“K, kuhum… I see. I see… So you can do… things like that, Boss?”
Ren appeared to be having a great misunderstanding.
In the next trial, it was my turn to prove Muller guilty, which I did a magnificent job of. It was my clean victory.
And in the next trial—
“Defendant Korin Lork. Defend yourself against allegations made due to your messy love life.”
“Haha… Is that all? Even if you say ‘messy love life,’ I’m sure it can’t be— wait, three people?! This guy – what a freaking bastard!”
- Like he’s one to talk?
- How many girls does he have his octopus legs on?
- No idea. I stopped counting past 100.
I lost.
It was a complete defeat.
Like, how did I lose that?
***
“Korin Lork. Congratulations on coming second. Here is your silver ribbon.”
“...”
How… how did this happen?
This was terrible. What I wanted had been a golden ribbon, and yet in what was supposed to be my last contest, I ended up getting a silver ribbon!
I failed at the very last moment!
“Well. Four golden ribbons is already amazing, isn't it? You’re missing one, though.”
“...”
H, how could this be…
Fuu… Let’s calm down.
So far, I had earned four golden ribbons and one silver ribbon. Normally, having this much would have been an impossible feat already.
The problem was that I had five golden ribbons to give in the Lady of Autumn Contest, which would be happening very soon.
Marie, Alicia, Hua Ran, Estelle, Master Erin…
Considering the undeserved love I was receiving from everyone, I wanted to give everyone a golden ribbon without any discrimination.
However…
“Ren…”
“Yes?”
“If I… had to give a silver ribbon to one of them… Who do you think it should be?”
“Hmm… Senior Marie would probably go…”
『Korin! Thank you! Nnn? A, am I the only silver ribbon? Umm… I see! Okay! No no no. Don’t worry about it. Yeah. I’m… fine.』
“Well, she might pretend like she’s okay, but she would probably feel hurt the most, right?”
“Damn it… What about Alicia…?”
『Ah… I see. Yes. It’s okay. I am far too lacking compared to everyone else anyway. That’s normal.』
“She would probably go like that, right?” Ren said.
“Ahhk…! She is probably going to talk herself down. I can’t have that!”
“What about Hua Ran?”
“Hua Ran is out of the question. Ran will cry and Hua will bash me up.”
“...I guess so.”
“If it was Estelle-noonim…”
『Hmm~ Okay? Sure. But you see, Dongsaeng? You owe me a favor.』
“Aren’t you scared of what she will ask you to do in return?”
“...”
That left us with… Master.
“If it’s Master…”
“I guess she will understand.”
She was the only one who wasn’t connected with me through romantic feelings. If it was her, she would certainly understand my circumstances and be considerate.
『Fufu, that’s okay. You have done a wonderful job getting all these ribbons.』
That’s right! Master will definitely say that while gently patting my head!
“Nn? Korin?” That was when I saw Master walking by.
“Huh? Master? Why are you here?”
“I’m going to host an event. What a coincidence that I have met my dear disciple on the way.”
She said after walking towards me. Instead of her usual working outfit, she was wearing a fancy autumn dress with some level of exposure.
“Wow~. That’s a pretty dress.”
“Fufu. I’ll be attending the Lady of Autumn Contest after all… So I dressed myself a little. Is it… strange considering my age?”
“Absolutely not. You look gorgeous. You should dress yourself like that more often.”
Master gave a benevolent smile in response while tucking her hair behind her ear.
“See this?” she then asked. “This is the earring from my dearest disciple. I am wearing the necklace and the bracelet as well!”
She was wearing all the accessories that I had given her as a gift. She was beautiful already and was now even more stunning after fully dressing herself up.
“Master. You know for the Lady of Autumn Contest…”
“Ah~ Yes! I’m looking forward to it!”
“Pardon?”
I immediately swallowed the scream that almost left my mouth.
“Lady of Autumn… it’ll be full of beautiful girls in the prime of their youth so I’m not expecting much but… It’s fine. I will be happy with one golden ribbon from my dear disciple.”
“...”
I couldn’t say it – I couldn’t ask if she could be content with just a silver ribbon… She probably would understand if I gave it though, and what she said must have been an unconscious comment on her part but…
“Really… It is my first time feeling like this. What a disgrace! Anyway, I will nonetheless try my best to put on the most beautiful appearance I can just for you, my dear disciple. Look forward to it.”
“...”
After she was done speaking, she disappeared off into the distance.
“...That was your chance to say it.”
“...”
“Boss?”
“AHH~ How grateful! Is the teacher’s graceee!!!”
“Are you okay in the head?”
“AHH~ How amazing! Is the teacher’s graceee!!!!”
There was no way around it. I couldn’t betray that smile and her expectations!
“For fuck’s sake…! My plan always falls off like this!”
“...”
“Of course, I had a backup plan. Huhu, huhahahaha…!”
This was my second year trying to save the world. Having the plan go astray against my will was nothing unusual.
Of course, I had a back-up!
“Student Korin Lork, 2nd year of the Knight Department, yes?”
“That is exactly the case!”
“You weren’t showing up until the last minute so I thought you weren’t coming.”
“I wasn’t going to attend if possible.”
“Ah… Anyway, now that you’re here…”
- Congratulations on attending the Crossdressing Contest, I guess?
A wise man always has a Plan B.
“HUHAHAHAHA…! WAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!”