Chapter 47
What had I done..?
Even though my libido had been boiling over, it was absurd that I'd done something like that in the bathroom, let alone used the Hero as a masturbation aid.
I had masturbated while fantasizing about doing that to none other than the Hero.
This is driving me crazy..
Why had I done that..?
No matter how much I thought about it, for some reason I couldn't figure out why I'd made that decision.
The only thing I could say for certain was that it had felt incredibly good.
The fact that this was the one thing I knew for certain made me feel disgusted with myself.
As soon as I came to my senses after doing that in the bathroom, I remembered that the Hero was right next to me.
Worried that he might notice what I'd done from any sounds I'd made or traces I'd left, I cleaned up as thoroughly as possible, but..
I looked toward the Hero, who had gone in to wash up, with a worried expression.
It was too late to worry about it now, though.
Still, fortunately, the Hero seemed oblivious to this sort of thing.. He could easily have found my reaction suspicious, but seeing him do nothing except worry about me made me feel needlessly sorry.
From the Hero's perspective, he'd approached me because he was genuinely worried, while I was using the very person worrying about me as a masturbation aid.
Why on earth had I used the Hero as a masturbation aid..?
I couldn't understand myself either.
After glancing toward the bathroom for a moment, I stood up.
At first, I was going to go to Cecilia and Ruril, but there was no way I could explain what had happened earlier to them, and I was worried that the Hero might have noticed something.
As I wondered what to do, I remembered the window I'd checked earlier.
A baseless thought occurred to me: with Lumia's magic, even the Hero wouldn't notice me using magic to briefly look inside.
I was only looking inside through a window, after all; it would be stranger if he noticed.
Using magic to eavesdrop through the wall wouldn't be a bad idea either, but he might notice that spell.
Just as I thought that and was about to leave the room, it suddenly occurred to me that what I was doing was no different from peeking at someone while they bathed.
Lumia wasn't some perverted woman who peeped at people bathing, so was this really okay?
More than anything, after what I'd done earlier, I was even more aroused, so watching the Hero bathe probably wasn't a good idea.
Damn..
This was all because of that aphrodisiac in the drawer.
When I thought about what the aphrodisiac had caused the last time I'd shared a room with the Hero, as well as what had happened today, I couldn't help resenting that drug.
I sat there wondering what to do, then writhed around, buried my face in the bed, and let out a deep sigh.
Come to think of it, whether or not the Hero noticed, there was no point in spying.
And right now, it was hard for me to face the Hero.
Every time I looked at his face, the fantasy I'd had while masturbating kept flashing through my mind, and I couldn't help feeling embarrassed.
Honestly, since it had felt so good when I'd masturbated with my own hand earlier, I had started wondering what it would feel like to do it for real, but..
That didn't mean I wanted the Hero to hold me yet.
Above all, I wasn't sure whether I loved the Hero, and if I slept with him out of curiosity in this situation and somehow got pregnant, the world would end.
To be completely honest, if someone asked whether I liked the Hero right now, I wouldn't know what to say.
The Hero had always been the one to save me in dangerous situations, and he had always cared for me when I struggled with everyday life, but given my original sex, it was only natural that some reluctance remained.
Even if I'd said we'd work through it little by little, some things were still impossible.
No matter what.. not until I genuinely came to like the Hero..
“...”
Damn it..
My body was still burning.
Then again, how long could I have kept going in the bathroom?
I'd done it quickly and come right out so the Hero wouldn't become suspicious, so it was only natural.
On top of that, though it was awkward to admit, perhaps because it was the bed where the Hero had been lying until earlier, a faint scent of him lingered.
...
I was definitely crazy.
I was actually smelling the Hero?
Just a few weeks ago, I hadn't had thoughts like this at all. I'd tried to avoid sleeping with the Hero as much as possible and find some way to have his child without sleeping with him, but now I was imagining sleeping with him..
It really showed how much I'd changed.
Although I said that, I was still drawn to the bed carrying the Hero's scent, so I lay down on it without a word and sighed..
I was absolutely not the weird one.
This was because of the drug.
That was the only explanation I could think of.
The fact that thoughts of the Hero kept coming to mind made me think that might be true, but I wanted to believe it for now.
I hesitated, then slipped my hand inside my underwear.
“...”
I could finish before the Hero came out and act as if nothing had happened, right..?
Maybe I hadn't calmed down after what I'd done earlier; I was still flooded down below.
“…///”
If I'd known it felt this good, I would've done it sooner.. No, I'm only doing it because I changed my mind; until recently, I wouldn't have done it, because I'd have felt guilty about using Lumia's body.
But instinctively, I knew.
Lumia wasn't going to appear, and this was reality.
Ironically, it was when I encountered the tentacle monster that I realized I was in a real world, not a game.
I didn't need to spend my life drowning in guilt over having taken over Lumia's body.. That was what I thought. Even if I told myself I wasn't Lumia, would the world save me?
I had to change.
Otherwise, I'd only make things harder for myself.
So.. I don't know anymore either.
I continued what I'd been doing earlier, doing my best to keep quiet so neither the Hero nor Cecilia and Ruril would notice.
Thanks to Lumia's character settings and the magic I'd cast on my throat, I kept letting out soundless moans.
.
.
.
The next day came.
Fortunately, the Hero hadn't noticed what I'd done in bed.
I used magic to take care of the bed and underwear that had gotten wet because of what I'd done.
As for what I'd done in the bathroom, it seemed the Hero hadn't noticed that either.
If he'd noticed, he would have looked at me strangely or something, but he hadn't acted any differently from yesterday, so he probably hadn't.
I just hoped he wasn't pretending not to know even though he did.
I really hoped so..
“By the way, Lumia.”
“..?”
“It seemed like you used magic in the room yesterday. Why did you use it?”
“...”
Seeing him ask that with such an innocent expression, I knew for certain that the Hero really didn't know.
I wondered whether to consider that fortunate..
On the other hand, I found it somewhat pathetic that the Hero couldn't even notice something like this.
Instead of answering, I looked away.
The Hero tilted his head at my reaction, but Cecilia and Ruril were looking at me suspiciously.
Looking only at my conversation with the Hero, there was no reason to suspect anything, but judging by their reaction, those two must have been the ones who put the drug in the room.
I'd have to confront them later.
Ruril joined the party.
Normally, Ruril was the one who wanted to join us, so we would have ended up setting out on a journey together because of that.. But this time, the Hero had already told the village chief that he would travel with Ruril, so we were able to leave right away.
Ruril also seemed happy to go on an adventure with us, so there was no reason to hesitate.
The necromancer was dead and Ruril had joined us, so the tutorial was as good as over.
“Well then, shall we go?”
The Hero asked us as we sat in the carriage the village chief had prepared for us.
Our next destination was the capital of the Empire, a massive city also known as the city of adventurers.
What we needed most right now was information, so we had to go to the city where information was most abundant and circulated most actively.
Our goal was to use not only the Hero's adventurer's badge but also my own to complete various requests and gather information about the Demon King and his army.
The Hero probably knew where we needed to go, but as far as appearances were concerned, we knew nothing; regardless, it was a place we had to visit.
“Thank you~!”
“Take care on your journey, Ruril!”
“Come visit again sometime!”
All the villagers gathered in front of the carriage and waved at us.
I drew a breath, my expression tense in a way that felt out of place.
Because now the real story was beginning.