Chapter 75
Tears have the effect of making you feel better once you let them all out.
No matter how you look at it, the human body is a slave to its hormones. Once tears well up and start spilling, reducing your stress, your mood naturally has no choice but to improve.
Or not.
"...Fuck."
Looking at my soaked sleeve and the puddle on the floor, I cursed, and a staff member came over and silently handed me something to clean it with.
"...Phew."
Once I had calmed down, I saw that the incense was about to go out again, so I refilled it and sat with my back against the wall where I could face Grandma.
"...Why did you do this? There are plenty of other good young people if you look for them."
I still couldn't understand why Grandma had tried to fill the void left by her children with me.
Weren't there plenty of other people besides an ungrateful bastard like me who didn't know how to repay her kindness? She had gone out of her way to make me chief mourner, and I had cut the funeral down to just two days because I was busy. The next step would begin as soon as dawn broke, just a few hours from now.
If she received fewer rites than other people, she might be ostracized in the afterlife... And I wasn't even performing those two days with any sincerity. I wanted to smoke in front of the deceased, but since I couldn't, all I did was keep breaking cigarettes.
Grandma must not have had anyone suitable to leave it to, so I would do it, but considering that she had left me an inheritance, she could have contracted a suitable funeral service while she was alive and left the arrangements to them. She had even written a will and passed away peacefully, so she must have known her own condition better than anyone.
And...
[Young man. If I die, could I ask you to handle my funeral?]
[...What kind of ominous request is that? You're still perfectly healthy.]
[I'm just saying it in advance... You never know what might happen. Who knows whether this old woman might drop dead tomorrow?]
[.........If I have time.]
...She couldn't possibly have taken that offhand remark seriously and left not a single word about it in her will. She hadn't even mentioned, 'Please take care of it, Sejin.'
[You always grumble, but you still do everything you're asked to... My children were like that too... They took after their father... Whenever I asked them to do something, they pretended they didn't want to, but they always did it in the end.]
"...How well did you really know me?"
Really. She was someone who left me with burdens right up to the end.
* * *
"...Phew."
After completing the funeral proceedings, I returned the suit to the funeral service and came home.
Grandma had been buried beside her husband and children, whom she had often talked about. She had once told me that she had left a place open beside them, saying that she would join them someday, and that was exactly what had happened.
"I told you to write things like that in your will."
It was fortunate I was around, or she would have ended up buried somewhere strange. She certainly had nerve.
"Um... Mr. Sejin... You worked hard. Please get some rest..."
"You worked hard too, Ms. Mia. Thank you for helping this morning. The staff were there, but coffins are surprisingly heavy. The more people, the better."
"And... I'm sorry. You told me not to come, but I went anyway..."
...Actually, it was true that I wasn't very happy she had ignored what I said.
But still...
"...I have no right to interfere with what you do, Ms. Mia."
We had grown a little closer recently. We were in the strange relationship of fake lovers, and we shared my secret, but that didn't mean I had the right to control her actions however I pleased.
Of course, if she tried to reveal my secret or blackmail me with it, I wouldn't sit idly by for the sake of my own safety. But this wasn't that. As the ordinary people 'Han Sejin' and 'Kim Mia,' being a little close didn't give either of us the right to control the other by saying what she could or couldn't do.
She wasn't even a minor, either. She was a twenty-year-old adult. I believed she had the right to choose her own actions. Of course, she had to take responsibility for them herself too.
Since she had chosen to come to the funeral and make her own heart heavy, I didn't intend to say anything more about it.
...And even if she hadn't known Grandma for very long, having suddenly received a house, she would naturally feel guilty if she couldn't even come to the funeral.
'...I was actually planning to tell her this morning.'
My intention had been to stop her from coming in the evening or at dawn to help and stay here. Since it would be morning and the funeral would already be nearly over, I had always planned to tell her then.
But she had gone and tracked the place down anyway, thanks to Aia's help.
'...That woman really does have a knack for popping up at the most inconvenient times.'
Judging by her personality, she did seem quite meddlesome, but even taking that into account, she showed up around me far too often...
It was then.
"...Don't abandon me!!!"
-Grab!
"W-what's this all of a sudden?!"
"When you say that, it sounds like you're cutting me off?! Like you're abandoning me?! Huh?! You can interfere all you want, just don't abandon me!"
"Why are you suddenly saying that?! Get off me for now! I haven't washed since yesterday, so I'm dirty!"
"Then it makes me want to hug you even more... Ah, no, that's not what I mean. You're not abandoning me, right?!"
"Whether I abandon you or not, Ms. Mia, you're not mine to begin with?!"
"...Then make me yours from now on!"
"Argh... Get off me first!"
As I'd noticed before, this woman was quite strong, so I slightly raised my magic and forcibly pulled her off me.
"There! Go into your room! You must have had a hard time since morning, so take a nap! Go do whatever you need to do!"
"...Okay. You... must have had a really hard time too, Mr. Sejin... Get plenty of rest. I'll be as quiet as possible... without making any noise."
"I'd appreciate that."
I had a sleep mask and earplugs anyway, but there was no need to turn down her offer to be considerate.
It was... around early afternoon, which wasn't normally a good time to sleep, but my body had nearly gone a whole night without rest. Having often switched my days and nights around, I could make this adjustment easily.
Assuming my insomnia didn't flare up... if I got up around evening and went back to sleep at night, I could maintain a normal sleep schedule from the next day...
'...'
[Oppa. Today is the happiest day of Alice's life.]
"...Phew. Just a moment, Ms. Mia. Just a moment... Could you come to my room...?"
"Sure! Should I shower first?"
"...If you want to shower, go ahead and shower..."
...Come to think of it, that sounded a little strange just now.
"...It's nothing weird. I just need you to cast a spell."
"Ah..."
"What's with that 'ah'?"
"...You stopped after the first syllable of 'okay.'"
...Are we talking through chat or something?
"Anyway, if you have time, please come over... I need to ask you for a moment. Um... you know Mental Cure, right? The one you used a few times before. Could you use it as quickly as possible? My head's starting to hurt from sleep deprivation."
"Mental Cure? Uh... If I accept a few side effects and do it really quickly, about fifteen minutes...?"
"...What kind of side effects?"
"You won't remember what happened during Mental Cure. And you won't be able to move your body during that time. It's a condition that it can only activate with the subject's permission..."
"Denied."
"I won't do anything suspicious! I'll just let you use my lap as a pillow! You have your mascot too! You can even install several cameras!"
"You're not planning to touch the feet of my Alice transformation form and massage my legs while you're at it, are you?"
"What do you take me for?! I do want to try that, but would I do that to someone who hasn't even given permission?!"
"The woman who asked me to let her touch my body and demanded to see what was under my skirt the moment she found out I was Alice."
"...I really did all that, so I can't deny it."
-Dizzy
"...Ah."
"Are you really that tired? Since you're saying you need Mental Cure, you must be in a situation where it's hard to sleep even though you're sleepy... If you just go to sleep, I'll quietly finish the spell and leave."
"..."
If I were acting according to my usual personality, I could never trust this.
I would be sleeping out in the open in front of someone else—and not even remember any of it, while being unable to move during it?
If this were the old me, I would have crumpled the paper and thrown it onto the floor without a second thought.
...Honestly, even now, that's what I think rationally. Why would I trust her enough to entrust myself to something like that?
After being betrayed by the person I should have been able to trust more than anyone in the world, how could I go and trust someone else like an idiot?
I should refuse. More than that, I should tell her never to make such an offer.
...That was... right, but...
-Squeeze
"...I'll have my mascot stand guard. My mascot belongs to an S-rank magical girl, after all, so it has quite a bit of physical power too. If you get kicked, your head will be ringing."
"Don't worry! When have I ever forced you to do something after you said you didn't like it, Senior?!"
...I feel like she had, though. But seeing how confidently she said it, maybe she hadn't.
-Queasy
"...Come in for now. Should I transform or not?"
"Whatever's comfortable for you. Isn't it uncomfortable to sleep while transformed?"
"I'm used to it, so it doesn't really matter... I'll stay like this."
-Swish
I brought Mia into the room and lay down on the bed first.
I wasn't in good enough shape to leisurely banter as usual. There wasn't much time left before filming my date with Black Rose, either. Was it the day after tomorrow, or the day after that?
It was close enough that not sleeping properly now would definitely affect my condition, so if I didn't want to film with dark circles under my eyes, I had to deal with it properly now.
"Here. Lie on my thigh."
"...But I have a pillow."
"This position is more comfortable for me. I have to keep my hand resting on top of your head anyway, so isn't a lap pillow better? You're going to sleep, right? I'll put you on the bed when we're done and leave."
"...Phew."
I had set things up so I could get into bed and sleep at any time, then went over and lay down where Mia patted, signaling me to come.
-Swish
-Flump
"I expected it, but your head is light too. Is it because you're small?"
"...Please hurry. As I told you, my mascot is watching."
"Don't worry. I'll have it done in no time. By the time you close your eyes and open them again, it'll all be over."
-Flash!
Mia's appearance changed into her familiar transformed form, and a familiar white light appeared in her hand.
Well... Tokkaengi wasn't coming out because it was reading my mood, but it must have been listening to everything, so if anything really happened, it would deal with it...
-Blank...
...On another note.
With my head on her lap, half my field of vision... no, about 70 percent of it, was blocked...
-Drip