Chapter 41
The Oddball Quartet
"Hey, hey~! What's up, boys and girls~!? You look low-energy~! Let's crank up the hype! Woohoo!"
Riko-senpai pointed both index fingers at us and gave us a 'Bachikoon☆' wink.
Simply annoying.
"Why are you here in the first place, Riko-senpai? We didn't invite you..."
"Leaving me out is so lame~. We're... besties forever, right?"
"So annoying."
"You've finally stopped hiding your thoughts, Otaku-kun."
"Were we friends?"
"Oh... Miyucchi's casual comment wounds me..."
"...By the way, Takanashi-san and I are friends, right?"
"...? If that's what you think, Yahiro-san, then I'm happy. We are friends."
"Yes!"
I struck a triumphant fist-pumping pose.
Even I had friends. Nothing could make me happier.
My body felt just as light as it had when I charged headlong into a pack of lycanthropes in desperation.
Nothing scares me anymore...!
"What happened to you, Yahiro-san...?"
"He probably never had anything happen to him... Mainly at school."
"Huh...?"
"If you're that happy, admit you're friends with me too, Otaku-kun! Gyarus and otaku are tight, tight!"
"Ah, yes. Sure. I look forward to being friends with you."
"That was so halfhearted!? But I'll allow it!"
For some reason, when it came to Riko-senpai, it felt incredibly like I'd lose if I let myself be happy.
But deep down, I was really happy. Did you see that, friends from middle school who had drifted away somewhere? I made new friends too...!
Even if I'm a loner in class!
"But seriously. You two are still wary of Rosso, since you don't know whether she's friend or foe, right?"
Riko-senpai shifted her weight onto one leg and sharpened her gaze.
"She looked like a good person to me, but if we can't be sure yet... In the dungeon, it never hurts to have more firepower on our side."
"...That's true."
There was no cell signal inside the dungeon. If the worst should happen, there couldn't be a more perfect setup.
But, well.
"No, we've mostly let our guard down, actually?"
"Yes. At the very least, I don't think she's the kind of person described in accounts from the future."
"Huhhh?"
Riko-senpai's serious expression vanished, replaced by furrowed brows.
"Seriously? Then why did you suddenly invite Rosso to the dungeon, Otaku-kun? Trying to pick her up?"
"No. We've mostly let our guard down, but I still wanted to see firsthand what kind of ability she had. And to get a better idea of what kind of person she was."
"Oh, is that it?"
"Besides, I'd already told Master about that."
"Being prepared means being happy, Otaku-kun!"
"Ah, yes."
I nodded along as Riko-senpai tried to bluff her way out of it. Still, more firepower couldn't hurt.
Leaving that foolish exchange behind, we started walking toward the cordoned-off facility. A few minutes later, a plain building of bare concrete came into view.
A motorcycle was parked in the lot, and Rosso-san stood there holding a harp.
"Heh..."
She wore a nihilistic smile, but she showed no sign of playing. She was really just holding it.
I thanked my lucky stars that this wasn't a busy area before calling out to her.
"Hello. Sorry to keep you waiting, Rosso-san."
"Heh, no matter, young oni. I merely arrived before the appointed time. It seems the scent of a battle that makes blood boil and flesh dance has summoned me here..."
"Fooo! You're so cool, Rosson! Looking forward to working with you today!"
"Eek... W-why are you here...!?"
"I kind of tagged along."
"Don't mind me—it's a night pool! Splash splash! Let's get together!"
Riko-senpai's needlessly high energy made Rosso-san's cheek twitch.
"A-a gyaru, why... Ugh... D-don't lose, me...! I'm the invincible vampire...!"
No, I didn't think she was much of a gyaru. Her speech was less gyaru slang than a series of old-man jokes.
Of course, I had never actually known a real gyaru. Getting involved with one would probably kill me. Emotionally.
"So... is it all right if there are four of us?"
"Very well. It is a wall I must overcome someday. The time has come for my darkness to paint over her light...!"
"What~? You're going to paint over me, Rosson? Thanks for the passionate confession! But sorry. I'm straight. I don't support yuri plots."
"I don't swing that way either!"
Rosso-san's eyes and mouth flew open, and Riko-senpai suddenly put on a serious expression.
"Oh, that reminds me—I forgot to ask. Is it okay if I speak casually? I heard you're older than us."
"Er, well, I don't mind..."
"Really? Seriously, thanksies! Looking forward to working with you, Rosson!"
"Uh, y-yes...?"
Confused, Rosso-san looked at me as if asking for help.
I silently shook my head. Sorry, there was nothing we could do.
Rosso-san continued mouthing 'Help' at me, but Riko-senpai leaned in close to her face.
"Say, Rosson."
"Eek, w-what? Is there something you wish to ask me?"
"Are you───an otaku-chan?"
Riko-senpai's eyes were those of a predator that had found its prey.
"Eek...!?"
Rosso-san, who had been trying to put away her harp, let out a frail scream. Her white skin grew even paler—so pale that blue might have been a more accurate description.
This was getting dangerous, so I stepped between them.
"Riko-senpai, stop. Stop it. You're making Rosso-san uncomfortable."
"Hey, hey, Otaku-kun, are you jealous? Don't worry. I'm equally kind to Otaku-kun and Otaku-chan...!"
"That's fine, then. Um, Rosso-san, are you okay?"
"I-I was terrified...! The abyss...! The abyss was peering into me...!"
"Well... she's not a bad person. Just a weirdo."
I soothed the trembling Rosso-san and made Riko-senpai keep her distance.
This person wasn't an otaku-friendly gyaru. She was the kind of weirdo who was obsessed with becoming one.
With Japanese law still unable to keep up, there was nothing anyone could do about her.
...There were a lot of weirdos in our clan that the law couldn't do anything about.
"For now, let's enter the dungeon. There's no point standing around here forever."
"Okay! Clan 'Alf's Gyaru & Otaku Team, march!"
"You are not a gyaru."
"You won't be saying that for long, Otaku-kun."
I ignored Riko-senpai, whose eyes had turned a little too serious, and entered the cordoned-off facility. I couldn't keep dealing with this any longer.
The staff member at the reception desk glanced at us, then did a perfect double take.
I understood the feeling. Whatever they were like on the inside, the three women behind me were unquestionably gorgeous, with incredible figures.
Riko-senpai was a tanned beauty who looked like a gyaru at first glance. She had some big... assets, so to speak.
Rosso-san, meanwhile, was a blonde beauty dressed in a striking red-and-black gothic-lolita outfit today, and she wore it beautifully. And, in ways I won't specify, she was big too.
Finally, there was Takanashi-san, who looked like a cool beauty with long black hair. The other two were well-endowed, but she dwarfed them both. In ways I won't specify.
Being with them, I might even have attracted some hostility myself. Knowing what they were really like made that seem unfair, though. Besides, we were here for work today.
I parted from the three of them and went to the changing room. After changing quickly, I found that, unusually, Takanashi-san still hadn't emerged.
I went to the restroom, then returned to the changing room, but the three of them still hadn't come out.
With time to kill, I turned my gaze toward the notice board at the cordoned-off facility.
Several requests to thin out dungeons in rural areas had been posted. There weren't enough ability users, and the public's understanding remained poor... yet they were still concentrated in the cities.
They were called requests, but they were really more like jobs. The regions that made them apparently offered a 'token of appreciation.' Sometimes it was gift certificates, and sometimes it was goods such as rice or meat.
The more rural the area, the less adequately the dungeons seemed to be handled. This area wasn't entirely unrelated, either. Even so, it was probably fortunate that there was Clan 'Alf' and one other clan here.
Apparently, that other clan was taking every job that came with a 'token of appreciation' from the local government.
Next, a police poster caught my eye.
It warned about crimes committed with abilities and appeared to be recruiting ability users for the police.
I'd heard that apprehending ability-using criminals was extremely difficult. The serial murders occurring in the Kanto region were apparently still unsolved, too.
The culprit's image had been captured on security cameras, and fingerprints had been collected. Both the face and name had been made public.
And yet, the culprit still hadn't been caught.
Apparently, the killer was a user of spatial magic who kept escaping the police with 'Teleportation.' At the same time, he continued committing crimes, so public criticism of the police and ability users was growing by the day.
I'd seen it on television before coming here: an anti-ability-user protest was being held in front of the National Diet. What stuck with me was that every participant had hidden their face behind a cloth mask or some other covering. Apparently, they did so to avoid having their identities exposed and being attacked by ability users.
They argued that ability users should be managed by the nation or the United Nations as 'patients and soldiers.' I had pointed out from in front of the television that it was odd to call them patients while planning to make them fight, and that Japan didn't even have a military profession called soldier outside the U.S. forces stationed here.
As I was thinking about that, the women's changing-room door opened.
"Sorry to keep you waiting, Otaku-kun. We got carried away with girls' talk!"
Riko-senpai came out energetically, followed by Takanashi-san and Rosso-san, who both looked somewhat exhausted.
I could more or less guess what had happened.
"Hah... No, I wasn't waiting that long."
"Good one, Otaku-kun. A classic is a classic because everyone loves it☆"
Riko-senpai joked around, but her outfit was properly suited to an adventurer. She wore an unadorned jumpsuit, a small backpack, and the clothing specified by the Spirit Affairs Agency.
"Then let us venture forth! To the field of adventure!"
"Heh... At last, the time has come to show my power!"
"Um, sorry, could you two keep it down a little?"
I admonished the self-proclaimed senpai and the twenty-something as we passed reception and headed farther inside.
I felt the metal door close behind us and deployed my 'Spirit Armor.'
After lightly tapping my gauntlets and breastplate to check them, I turned my gaze toward the other three.
Riko-senpai's 'Spirit Armor' looked like a modified Japanese outfit.
She wore a sleeveless white kimono beneath a black cape. Below that was a black miniskirt that left her slender legs bare. From the ankles down, she wore white tabi socks and platform geta.
Her hands were covered by fingerless gloves, and each one gripped a fan decorated in black and purple.
Rosso-san's 'Spirit Armor' was, naturally, the same as what I'd seen that day.
A crimson cloak, a black top that showed off her figure, a gray pannier, and heeled boots.
It was an outfit that highlighted her long limbs and generous chest. But she held a terrifying weapon in her hands.
A scythe taller than she was. Its blade extended in the same direction as the shaft, shaped like the kind used for cutting grass overseas.
But the blade was thick and broad, clearly unsuited to cutting weeds. It was a weapon designed to take lives, meant to cut through flesh and bone.
The red, spiky decorations made it an especially imposing weapon.
Both women even carried a mysterious air that complemented their beauty.
They looked as though they had stepped straight out of a story.
"Heh-heh~. So? How's my 'Spirit Armor'... Wait, Miyucchi, that is way too sexy!?"
"Heh... My 'Spirit Armor' is beautiful as ever... As expected, it's an erotic swimsuit!"
That ruined everything.
I admitted that Takanashi-san's 'Spirit Armor' was lewd, though. It made it very difficult to know where to look.
"...? I believe my exposed skin is second only to Yahiro-san's."
"The body line! The body line is insane!"
"Clothes! I think you should put some clothes on over that!"
"I don't possess clothing imbued with magic. We cannot expect it to provide defense against monsters. Besides, 'Spirit Armor' does not tear from merely scraping against rocks or trees."
"That's not the point!?"
"Doesn't she have any shame...?"
What was this atmosphere?
I turned away from the three of them with a distant look in my eyes.
A few minutes later, after Riko-senpai and the others had given up on trying to persuade Takanashi-san...
Dungeon exploration by the four-person party began.