The Lock on the Treasure Chest

'Well, it's about time for your reincarnation in another world.'

【A beautiful goddess has appeared】

'What an unpleasant display feature.'

"Ah, my window's been deleted."

'Last time, you were announcing level-ups. Haven't you grown at all since then?'

"It seems Goddess-sama's breasts have stopped leveling up."

'You've polished your courage, I see.'

"This room heals pretty quickly. I was thinking of proving I'd grown by showing you the EXP remaining until my next level-up."

'I'm a goddess, so I'm already complete.'

"In other words, you won't grow anymore."

'Honestly, don't make me use my power over and over.'

"Please don't turn me to cinders over something like that."

'Blasphemy is punishable by incineration. Remember that.'

"You don't have to let me appeal, but at least give me a trial."

'I am the law, and I am the executioner.'

"What an independent nation. Anyway, shall I draw from the suggestion box?"

'I don't want to use my precious gacha luck on you, so go ahead and draw for yourself.'

"You've really fallen into the social-game swamp. Let's see... From Yappy336: 'The Lock on the Treasure Chest.'"

'Another inanimate object.'

"That's my specialty."

'I admire your positive attitude. Let's decide on your options.'

"First, I guess we need to decide whether the treasure chest contains treasure or a mimic."

'If it contains treasure, I'd like to ban any item that makes the world impossible to save unless you open me.'

"Like a legendary weapon or an item that weakens the Demon King? I'd hand it over normally."

'There's hardly anyone I have to be more wary of than you.'

"I can't beat you, Goddess-sama."

'Blasphemy.'

"But I meant that as a compliment."

'Think about the context. I'm not opposed to the idea of making you a monster, but in your case, you'd probably become something stronger than the Demon King.'

"I can't beat you, Goddess-sama."

'Blasphemy.'

"I meant in terms of strength."

'Comparing yourself to me is blasphemy.'

"The law is too strict. I need a lawyer."

'I'm the lawyer. The defendant is probably guilty.'

"It's rough being in a courtroom with no one on your side. Next, the lock's options. I'll add the standard high-voltage current."

※Actually, that's high current. Voltage is measured in volts (V), and current in amperes (A).

'I'm taking that off.'

"Aw, come on."

'You're far too hostile. Act like a proper lock.'

"Hmm, hmm. I see. So that's how locks work."

'You suddenly started seriously researching how locks work.'

"So that's how master keys work. Huh, interesting."

'You've started getting sidetracked. I see. This is fascinating.'

※Master keys are easy to understand once you know how they work. If you like novels, it's worth knowing about them.

"But I'd hate to get picked. I can't exactly electrocute anyone. Maybe a dimple key would be good."

※Look up images of dimple keys. Once you understand how master keys work, you'll see what's so impressive about these locks, too.

'I doubt dimple keys are common in a fantasy world.'

"Then perhaps this time it'll be low fantasy."

'If dimple keys exist, then magic that unlocks doors must be rare, and Thief-type Jobs probably wouldn't get much use, either.'

"I'd prefer a high-fantasy world if possible, so I'll just tweak this here and... All right, I'm off. I'll do my best to bring back the contents as a souvenir."

'Please move on to the afterlife already.'

◇

'Oh? I can't find the key to the safe where I keep snacks so he won't eat them.'

"I'm back."

'Perfect timing. Open this lock for me, would you?'

"So much for a heartwarming reunion. Life sure is harsh. There, it's open."

'As expected of someone who became a lock. You've learned a lot about how they work.'

"I could even unlock the door to your heart now, Goddess-sama."

'Blasphemy.'

"I'm so happy to feel myself coming back to life. Let me have a cheesy line or two."

'That's trespassing.'

"Now that you mention it, you're right. Anyway, I'll give my report. Where should I start?"

'Let's start with what's inside the treasure chest. I'm curious.'

"I made sure to avoid anything that would make it impossible to save the world unless you opened me."

'That's commendable. So what's inside?'

"The Demon King."

'So you arranged things so the world would be saved if no one opened you?'

"His name was the Demon King Spacious."

'A name at odds with his way of life.'

※Spacious means 'roomy' or 'wide-open.'

"I set it up so my role was to be the lock on the treasure chest that sealed away the Demon King Spacious, who had tried to destroy the world long ago."

'That's an awfully ambitious backstory for a lock.'

"By the way, I cost twenty yen."

'So you were humble. You could've made yourself a slightly more expensive lock.'

"The key, on the other hand, was a luxury item made of pure gold and studded with jewels."

'You made the key pointlessly extravagant.'

"Well, with this setup, I'd be done the moment someone opened me. I wanted that one encounter to be special."

'I want to understand, but I don't want to understand the feelings of a mere lock.'

"The Demon King Spacious was immensely powerful, but with their body folded into six parts, they could barely move."

'That's even more cramped than I imagined. Folding a person into six parts would kill them on the spot.'

"The Demon King Spacious's hobby in their free time was yoga."

'I never expected a hobby to be what saved them from being sealed away. Still, even yoga couldn't make being folded in six possible.'

"The Demon King Spacious was Demon-King-level at yoga, after all."

'I don't even know what Demon-King-level yoga means.'

"Deep within the temple that worshiped the gods, the Demon King Spacious complained every day about the god who had sealed them away."

'Of course they would resent the god who sealed them away.'

"They'd complain that the god's feet stank, or that the god's clothes were tacky."

'Those are complaints on the level of a villager.'

"They'd say the god resold a game they'd lent them, or ate an entire soft-serve ice cream after being offered just one bite."

'Were they friends? It seems the god wasn't much better.'

"They'd say, 'Fine, you planted the seed of an eternal conflict between the creatures of the Demon Realm and humanity, but I'll never forgive you for pouring lemon juice on the fried chicken without asking.'"

'They should be angry about the first thing. I can understand the second, though.'

"They also said they'd never forgive the god for squirting lemon juice in their eyes."

'That god really does seem like a jerk.'

"The Demon King Spacious was so unfortunate that I couldn't help talking to them sympathetically."

'You did add an option that lets you talk, didn't you?'

"When they said, 'A lock talking?!' I cast a spell that poured lemon juice into the treasure chest."

'It's fine that you can use magic, but that's vicious.'

"I poured in so much that lemon juice seeped out of the treasure chest, and the Demon King Spacious learned their lesson."

'At that point, it wasn't just getting in their eyes. They were practically drowning.'

"By the way, the priests who witnessed it mistook it for an ominous omen."

'If lemon juice started seeping out of a treasure chest with the Demon King sealed inside, that wouldn't be surprising.'

"It cleaned the rust off the chest, too."

'Lemons really are amazing.'

"After that, an investigation team arrived and began conducting all sorts of tests."

'They investigated it, as you'd expect.'

"I didn't want some old guy touching me, so I shot lemon juice into his eyes."

'What a vicious lock.'

"They judged it dangerous and placed an even stronger barrier around the treasure chest."

'The right choice.'

"The barrier made all moisture evaporate, completely sealing away the lemon juice."

'Very specific.'

"The Demon King Spacious was drying out inside the chest, too."

'They were sealed away to begin with.'

"Feeling sorry for them, I cast a spell that poured salad oil into the treasure chest."

'What a vicious lock.'

"The Demon King Spacious was a fishman-type monster, so they perked up like a fish in water."

'It was oil, though. Could they breathe?'

"I poured in so much that salad oil seeped out of the treasure chest, and the Demon King Spacious awakened."

'They actually awakened? No one could've seen that coming.'

"By the way, the priests who witnessed it mistook it for an ominous omen."

'If salad oil started seeping out of a treasure chest with the Demon King sealed inside, that wouldn't be surprising.'

"It lubricated the lock, too."

'Salad oil really is amazing.'

"After that, an investigation team arrived and began conducting all sorts of tests."

'They came back? And became your next victims?'

"No. They slipped on the spilled salad oil, fell over, and were left near death."

'Spilled oil doesn't evaporate easily.'

"They judged it dangerous and placed an even stronger barrier around the treasure chest."

'I'm not sure that was the right choice.'

"The barrier made every trace of oil burst into flames, completely sealing away the salad oil."

'Was that the wrong choice? You didn't seal it away at all. If anything, you made things worse.'

"The Demon King Spacious was on fire inside the chest, too."

'That poor Demon King is definitely a candidate for reincarnation in another world.'

"But if the salad oil caught fire every time I produced it, I couldn't exactly fry tempura in peace."

'Don't start cooking, lock.'

"So I tried to break the barrier with a nonflammable, nonvolatile solvent."

'Are you water-aligned this time?'

"I almost accidentally cast it into the treasure chest, but the Demon King Spacious warned me not to."

'They're pretty clever, anticipating what you'd do.'

"Well, I cast it anyway."

'What a vicious lock.'

"I mean, if someone tells me over and over not to do something, then I have to do it."

'A lock with a strong comedian's spirit.'

"The Demon King Spacious already had plenty of magic power, so they didn't take much damage. It was only a little."

'Being soaked in lemon juice, salad oil, and solvent while folded into six parts isn't what I'd call a little.'

"After pouring in so much solvent that it seeped out of the treasure chest, the Demon King Spacious evolved."

'They evolved? They're pretty adaptable.'

"By the way, the priests who witnessed it mistook it for an ominous omen."

'If solvent started seeping out of a treasure chest with the Demon King sealed inside, that wouldn't be surprising.'

"It destroyed the surrounding seals, too."

'That's a pretty serious emergency.'

"After that, an investigation team arrived and began conducting all sorts of tests."

'I wonder what you'll do to them next.'

"They got curious about what was inside the chest and tried to open it with a key."

'They really did go and do it.'

"But nobody wants a lock opened without any sense of occasion."

'I doubt even the Demon King wanted that.'

"So I attacked the old guy holding the key with lemon juice."

'The barrier that neutralized the lemon juice had been destroyed, after all.'

"The old guy flew into a rage and said, 'How dare you do this to a god!'"

'The old guy was a god?'

"They said, 'The Demon King continues to defy the gods even after being sealed away. They truly are an evil existence! I'll destroy them with my own hands!'"

'The Demon King wasn't resisting at all, though.'

"I fought back with salad oil and solvent, but they were a god, after all. They kept thrusting in the key without flinching, even as they were soaked from head to toe."

'Just picturing it makes me sad.'

"They slipped on the salad oil and fell over about three times."

'Salad oil seems to be a bit of a weakness for them.'

"The god turned the key stuck in me with a smug expression, covered in salad oil and solvent."

'That's not very dignified.'

"Then came the high-voltage current."

'Why is it still there when I removed it?'

"It was one of the treasure chest's options."

'Had there been a reincarnator in another world who hadn't said a single word until now?'

"Treasure chests don't talk."

'Be quiet, lock.'

"The salad oil alone wouldn't conduct electricity, but the solvent conducted it well, so the god was spectacularly electrocuted. The key was gold, too."

'A pointless science lesson. At high voltage, the oil wouldn't matter anyway.'

※Oil doesn't conduct electricity, but that's not necessarily true at high voltages!

"The god was knocked out by that one blow."

'That high-voltage current is incredible if it can even take down a god.'

"It was enough to take down the Demon King Spacious, too."

'So they were electrocuted after all.'

"And so, the Demon King Spacious was defeated by the hero."

'The treasure chest was the hero?'

"A treasure chest that takes down not only the Demon King but a god, too. What a presumptuous thing."

'The accomplice lock has some nerve saying that.'

"In the end, the god stopped interfering with the world because of the injuries they'd suffered, and humanity was free to live as it pleased. They made peace with the Demon Realm, and tranquility came to the world."

'Come to think of it, that god was a jerk. It was a fitting end, and a good outcome.'

"But as for me, the old guy ended my role as a lock, and I never got to do much of anything."

'I think you accomplished more than a mere lock should have.'

"In the end, I couldn't feel satisfied, so I came back here."

'Satisfied... Well, now that you mention it, I'm not sure you could've been satisfied.'

"And as for my souvenir, as promised, I brought back what's inside the treasure chest."

'Take it back.'