Chapter 27
The Head Mod has disappeared.
And a day passed.
- Head Mod ← Where the fuck is this bastard?
- Ah lol, this joke isn't funny.
- What kind of bait is he trying to spin this time...
- There he goes again. Go eat your meal.
The initial reactions were awkwardness.
As Head Mod went dark, the Marketplace and barter system naturally went down as well, and an uneasy mood spread through the gallery.
And a week passed.
- Please come back, please come back, please come back.
- Ah... This isn't fun!!! Stop it already!!!
- Yeah, if you're gone, the gallery can just die~
Title: Head Mod Is Back!!!
(A meme of a frog with a noose around its neck)
Actually, this is bait.
But what are you gonna do about it?
What can you do?
You worthless little bastard lol
Besides getting pissed off or cursing in the comments, what the hell can you do, you little bastard? lol
- Looooool
- Ah lmaoooo
- Ah... fuck...
ㄴ Whew...
ㄴ Come back already...
ㄴ I don't know what this is about, but we're sorry...
ㄴ OP) Fuck.
Title: But This Is Karma
(A meme of an elf throwing a fit over Prohibition)
(A meme of Adrian's crown prince ordering people around)
(A meme of someone throwing a fit over adding items to the Marketplace)
Yeah, this is your karma.
I knew it would turn out like this someday.
Honestly, from Head Mod's perspective, there's nothing to feel guilty about.
If even the people who do nothing but take handouts acted entitled, what does that make them?
...lol. We deserve to get smacked, right?
- Aaaagh, aaagh
- (An elf kneeling emoticon)
- Head Mod, I'm really sor... for whining and begging you for chicken...
ㄴ You crazy bastard, but still, please unlock the chicken!
ㄴ I don't know anymore.
ㄴ The world was doomed to fall apart anyway; Head Mod just performed CPR on it for a little while.
- Has the imperial family issued no statement?
ㄴ Lol, our gallery users really expect something like that?
ㄴ I'm telling you, there isn't a single apology letter or anything like that, lol.
ㄴ Recruiting rebels: 1,000/10,000
- I have nothing to eat.
- Without the Marketplace, I have to go out and do the legwork myself...
- Do I have to climb the mountain and forage for grass again?
- ...I'm really hungry.
- There's no alcohol either. Life isn't fun anymore...
The gallery slowly began returning to the past.
To the early days when food was precious,
when all joy had vanished,
and survival in the here and now was the only goal.
- Ah lol, we found our roots again...
- We really went back to the roots of being idiots, morons, dumbasses, and fucking assholes.
And the Adrian Empire was hit hardest by this crisis.
More than any other race, they had come to depend on the Marketplace and barter system.
In particular, the people, unable to forget the pleasure and fullness they had tasted even once, were wasting away miserably.
“Above all, we lack the personnel and supplies needed to defend imperial territory.”
“Because we are located at the center of the continent, we also suffer the highest frequency of attacks by magical beasts.”
Adrian was located at the center of the continent.
That put it at a disadvantage compared to the dwarves' subterranean kingdom nestled in the mountains or the elves deep within Elrad Forest.
Since they had settled around the Empire by building walls in a great circle, they had fronts to defend in every direction.
“I know.”
Frederick nodded with a grave expression as he listened to the report.
How could he not?
Hadn't more than half of Adrian already been devoured by magical beasts because of that very weakness?
Adrian was also where Head Mod's return was needed most desperately.
“We must write an apology!”
“Think calmly. Without the gallery, the Empire may not be able to avoid the fate of the Kingdom of Kelton.”
The ordinary nobles, unaffiliated with the imperial faction, brought out the words they had been holding back.
They had long since been slowly losing ground on every front except the south.
Even if it meant abandoning their pride, protecting the Empire's future was what mattered.
“Heh heh, what amusing nonsense.”
“Write an apology and beg Head Mod's forgiveness? Don't those words sound rather treasonous?”
“You people certainly have no qualms about saying such things in His Majesty's presence.”
Yet the crown prince and his closest aides still held the imperial court in their grasp.
And they were the very people who had personally plotted Head Mod's assassination.
Naturally, the suggestion of bringing Head Mod over to their side was never going to fly.
“A traitor? I was thinking of the Empire's welfare! Or are you suggesting we all starve to death like this?”
“We should starve to death.”
Duke Isaac quietly chimed in then.
“Rather than bow our heads to Head Mod for mocking the imperial family, would it not be better for us all to starve to death?”
“D-Duke, that is too—!”
The atmosphere in the conference room was on the verge of boiling over.
“That's enough.”
Frederick quietly calmed the atmosphere.
Once all eyes had turned to him, he put a hand to his brow and called the meeting to a close with a sigh.
“We can't have a conversation like this. Let us end the meeting.”
“But!”
“Do you think I don't know? We won't find a solution this way, so we should organize our thoughts and meet again later.”
No one dared object to the emperor's words.
Eventually, when only Duke Isaac and he remained in the conference room, Frederick let the smile he had been hiding show.
“Of course I know about the crisis.”
With Head Mod, the Empire would survive.
He knew that much, of course, but if Head Mod remained, his own position would be in danger.
Once everyone had enough to eat and live comfortably, the authority of the imperial family would begin to fall instead.
He might be driven out or killed over the defeat in the Great War, incompetent politics, and any number of other problems.
“In that case, I'd rather have the Empire go to ruin as it did before.”
Whether the Empire was prosperous or struggling, Frederick had always lived in comfort.
He would rather reign as emperor over a declining Empire and live comfortably until the day he died.
Frederick turned his gaze to Isaac.
“Duke, what of the assassins?”
“Well, we haven't heard from them yet. But judging by Head Mod's absence, the operation must have succeeded.”
“Yes, it had better have.”
It was a little unsettling that the assassins hadn't returned, but what could Head Mod possibly do about it?
Frederick opened the gallery with a satisfied smile.
And then he saw the newly uploaded Featured Post.
Featured Post) Fuck, it's me, you bastards
Author) Head Mod☆
(A meme of assassins charging forward)
(A meme of a broken screen displaying nothing but black)
Hello everyone
I was threatened with assassination and had to dive into a Rift, so I couldn't take questions.
Apparently, a whole lot of time passed while I was entering the Rift.
It's dangerous right now, so this isn't exactly the time to post, but I figured I had to say what I needed to say, so here I am, yeah.
The Adrian imperial court's trolls dug through my gallery log and tried to kill me.
So, having felt a serious threat to my life, I hereby announce:
IP bans for Adrian and all related regions.
Duration – Permanent ㅗㅗ
Reason – Elimination of trolls.
Well, that's that. Take care.
- Fuck, what, an assassination attempt?
- What the hell, are you okay now?
- Taldru) Brother, did you bring your sword? Stay right next to it for now.
- ??????
- Where are you? I'm coming to help, at least;
- Ah, fuck... the Empire's bastards really chose the dumbest possible way to handle this.
- I live on the edge of Adrian imperial territory. Fuck, am I banned too? Please, please, please.
ㄴ Lol, yep, take it like a man.
ㄴ Ah, fuck, I should've defected from the Empire sooner...
ㄴ What the hell is this, all because of the trolls?
- Full-Blood Elf★) What? Are you okay? Where are you, Head Mod? I'll come find you right away.
ㄴ Wow, he dropped the act.
ㄴ Who cares about that when Head Mod's dying? lol
- Diehard Vampire★) What? Report Head Mod's health status. I can deploy at any time.
ㄴ When did this guy get so close to Head Mod?
ㄴ Head Mod was the first one to talk to him.
ㄴ He said he couldn't live without Head Mod's Marketplace, lol.
“What the...”
Hadn't they succeeded in killing him?
“Your Majesty, please open the door!”
“I just saw the Featured Post. Please tell me what this means!”
Bang! Bang!
The nobles who had left began pounding on the conference room door.
Frederick's expression darkened sharply.
“How the hell did Head Mod know the assassins were from Adrian?!”
*
My dizzy vision gradually cleared.
I slowly braced a hand against the ground and opened my eyes, seeing wadded-up tissues, candy wrappers, chicken bones, and so on.
“What the—”
It was the trash I had thrown into the Rift.
When I looked around, I saw a vast world steeped in purple.
“Where the hell am I now?”
The inside was stranger than I had expected.
There was a sky and ground, along with traces of civilization in the distance that looked like an unfamiliar kingdom.
“Aaaaaagh!”
Crack, crunch, snap.
And finally, grotesque magical beasts.
Only then did I realize where I was.
Inside the Rift—a whole other world.
And this was the “Outside” that the gallery had said was the cause of the Great War.
The Rift was a kind of portal connecting the Outside to this world.
‘So that's why everyone had headaches?’
[Danger. Danger. Leave this location immediately.]
I got to my feet, backing away.
[12-Gauge Shotgun] - 240 points
Of course, I hadn't forgotten to buy a weapon.
Crack-crack.
“S-save me!”
Looking toward the last scream, I saw an assassin whose leg was being eaten by a magical beast.
It seemed he had thrown himself into the Rift after me.
And, thankfully, the magical beasts in the Rift had used him as bait in my place.
“sry.”
“Aaaaaagh!”
The assassin died after letting out one final death cry.
“Grrr.”
“Kieeeek.”
The magical beasts drawn by the commotion began approaching me.
The problem was that they looked far more ferocious and powerful than the magical beasts I had seen in the otherworld.
BANG!
“Kieeek!”
One of the approaching magical beasts was blown into bloody pulp, but it wasn't killed with one shot.
It was practically half-dead, but the problem was that it still hadn't died—and there were an absurd number of them.
“I'm leaving now.”
[You cannot exit through the Rift.]
But just as trash could only be sent into the Rift one way, I couldn't get out either.
“Kieeek!”
Bang!
I blasted away another approaching magical beast, but there was nowhere left to retreat.
Now that magical beasts completely blocked me on every side, I had only one option left.
[Rabbit Hole Ticket]
I lowered my gun and immediately pulled out the ticket.
“Kieeek!”
Riiip!
Just before the magical beast pounced, I tore the ticket in half!
“Huh?”
At the same time, a Rabbit Hole opened in the floor, and I tumbled into it in a daze as my vision spun.
“Can't the magical beasts enter?”
No wonder even the system couldn't read this item.
After traveling down the tunnel for a long while like riding a slide, an exit opened at some point.
“Gah!”
“Squeak!”
I collided with something soft.
As I slowly got up from the floor and came to my senses, I felt countless eyes on me.
From directly below me, from beside me, from all around me—no, from every direction.
“Head Mod?”
“Heehee.”
Rabbit beastfolk with strikingly upright ears, heart-shaped eyes, and drool streaming from their mouths.
I realized I had dropped right into their midst.
“This is bad.”
Before I could even get up, human hands and fluffy rabbit paws began reaching for me from every direction.