Chapter 9
FullHPElf: This is a fraudulent contract, dae-yo!
FullHPElf: Do you think I'll submit just because you do this, dae-yo?
FullHPElf: Take off this hateful blue badge, dae-yo. Right now!
“This is impossible!”
Eliana, the captain of the elven knights, slammed her fist on the desk and trembled.
Her normally calm blond hair was sticking out in every direction from sheer bewilderment.
It had taken only one sentence to make Eliana, who was famous for her composure, this impassioned.
[You have become a mod of the Otherworld Destruction Gallery.]
[A blue badge has been issued. Congratulations!]
“Eeeek!”
What was a mod?
It was a manager who wore a blue badge next to their username and managed the gallery.
Their role was to drive out trolls and protect the gallery's peace.
In short, they were unpaid slaves.
So she hurriedly lodged a complaint with Head Mod through the administrator chat.
Head Mod☆: Don't like it?
FullHPElf: Do you think I would, dae-yo?! Take it off right now, dae-yo!
Head Mod☆: Well, I can't exactly force you to keep the role.
Head Mod☆: Okay, I'll take it off again.
At least Head Mod wasn't completely unreasonable.
He seemed to accept her firm refusal, albeit with some regret.
Head Mod☆: (A meme of the gallery's ban list)
Head Mod☆: But if you're going to leave, leave the gallery entirely, yeah.
FullHPElf: ??
Head Mod☆: You've witnessed the gallery's top-secret information as a manager. You can't just go back to being a civilian.
Head Mod☆: If you're leaving our organization, leave with your life on the line...!
FullHPElf: Aren't you completely insane!!!
FullHPElf: Dae-yo!!!
But Head Mod was even crazier than Eliana had thought.
She had barely become a manager and had only seen the administrator chat, so how could this be top-secret information...?
Head Mod simply had no intention of letting Eliana go.
“Head Mod. So this is how you're going to play it?”
Eliana felt as if the future had gone dark, but it wasn't as though she had no options at all.
She glanced around at the atmosphere in the gallery.
- But is Head Mod seriously sane? Of all people, he had to pick her;
- FullHPElf is seriously a terrible choice!!!
- Ah lol, the gallery is completely screwed
- How Head Mod is ruining the gallery...jpg
“Just as expected.”
The situation was quite literally five minutes before total chaos.
Everyone was expressing concern about her becoming a mod.
Unlike her public position as captain of the elven knights, she was a bizarre elf who went around the gallery using the FullHPElf username and speaking in dae-yo-speak.
And Eliana decided to take full advantage of this atmosphere.
Title: Nice to meet you all, dae-yo~ I'm FullHPElf, the newly appointed sub-mod, dae-yo!
Author: FullHPElf★
I've actually wanted to become a mod for a long time, dae-yo.
Listen to my goals as a mod, dae-yo.
First, once I become a mod!
I'll start by punishing the gallery user who took my old username, CuteNewbieElf.
Second!
I'll ban all the elf-haters I've disliked for a while.
And finally, I'll IP-ban every dwarf and dark elf our people don't get along with, so they can't enter the gallery at all, dae-yo!
From now on, the gallery will be ruled by the FullHPElf faction, dae-yo!
Upvotes 75 Downvotes 999+
[Comments 53]
- Ah, fuck; the gallery is really going to hell
- Head Mod, it's not too late even now!!! Get a grip!!!
- This is what a properly run gallery looks like, dae-yo. Everyone, kneel and bow your heads, dae-yo!
ㄴ She said the FullHPElf faction, you elf simp;
ㄴ What are you saying, dae-yo?
ㄴ You've been brainwashed too.
“Good, the reactions are cold.”
Leaders could never go it alone.
If they continued charging ahead even after public opinion turned against them, that was precisely what made them dictators.
No one could ignore public opinion.
- Head Mod, explain your criteria for picking sub-mods!
- Head Mod, repent and release ten thousand Cokes!
- I couldn't buy tuna cans this morning! Release some more!
- I'm seriously as pissed as if I'd missed out on five tuna cans
ㄴ Lol, what is wrong with these guys?
Even if that public opinion seemed somewhat defective.
Title: It's me. But I had my reasons. If this keeps up
Author: Head Mod☆
Before long, Head Mod really did put up an explanation post.
“As expected! Justice prevails, dae-yo!”
Yeah, what could Head Mod do, no matter how much authority he had?
Eliana smiled victoriously.
Then, eager to see what kind of explanation he had posted, she immediately clicked on it.
Radar.
(A meme of Radar wearing a mask)
Upvotes 83 Downvotes 182
“What?”
Eliana felt her mind go blank.
Head Mod was even less sane than she had thought.
[Comments 92]
- Looks like he can't read the room;
- Head Mod, this isn't the time to joke around, seriously
- Exactly. You still want to act like this when public opinion has turned against you?
ㄴ Head Mod☆) Then why don't you guys become sub-mods?
ㄴ But now that I think about it, I do believe there was a legitimate reason behind Head Mod's choice, yeah.
Title: It's me, I have something to say
Author: Head Mod☆
An explanation? lol
(A serious-looking front-facing meme of a dwarf)
Anyone who mouths off to me becomes a sub-mod.
Of course, that's a joke.
But actually, it's not a joke.
If you have a problem, I'll make you a sub-mod lol.
Upvotes 999+ Downvotes 75
[Comments 104]
- This guy is just fucking insane lol
- We call this a dictator
- What can the gallery users even do about it besides curse in the comments? lol
“Ah, no...”
Was the rebellion really going to end this helplessly?
Just then, a notification came clunking into Eliana's system.
[A notification has arrived in the administrator chat room.]
“...Gulp.”
Eliana felt more nervous than she ever had during a magical-beast extermination as she opened the administrator chat room.
There she was confronted by Head Mod's terrifying chat, as though he had known everything all along.
Head Mod☆: lol, give up
Head Mod☆: But I'll send you a Coke can now and then hehe
FullHPElf: Eee! Aaaaaah!!!!
And so the first rebellion attempt by one lifetime sub-mod came to a meaningless end.
*
Announcement post) Ah... the Otherworld Destruction Gallery... hereby declares 「Conscription」...
(A thumbs-up meme of Byeongdol, the human race's military mascot)
As of today, the Otherworld Destruction Gallery is adopting conscription.
The criteria for conscription are as follows.
.
.
Actually, there are no criteria. I'll pick whoever I want.
Q) Why are you suddenly doing this?
A) I took into consideration the fact that no one has volunteered to become a sub-mod despite further recruitment efforts.
If nobody steps up, I can just point someone out lol.
What if you've been chosen as a holy guardian of the Otherworld Destruction Gallery?
Congrats. That makes you a proud and excellent worker of the Otherworld Destruction Gallery.
Now you just need to work hard for the Otherworld Destruction Gallery.
I hope you will work for the Otherworld Destruction Gallery as an excellent sub-mod.
Q) What happens if I refuse to apply to become a sub-mod?
A) The Otherworld Destruction Gallery is not lenient toward draft dodgers.
Draft dodgers will have their status as gallery users revoked and be forcibly expelled.
A 9,999-day ban, okay?
If you're a dragon or long-lived race who thinks 9,999 days is nothing, go ahead and try me.
Upvotes 999+ Downvotes 999+
[Comments 999+]
- He's fucking nuts lol
- This is a human rights violation
- (An elf emoticon throwing a punch)
- Yes, sir, yes, sir^^77
- Fucking hell lololololololol
- But if it's a dragon, what if they really ignore you?
ㄴ Then they won't be able to eat tuna cans for 9,999 days lol
ㄴ If they ignore me, I can just pick someone else~
ㄴ This is seriously insane iron-fisted rule;;
- I have a question. What's the benefit of becoming a sub-mod?
ㄴ Head Mod☆) I will look favorably upon you
ㄴ “Look favorably,” my ass lol
ㄴ The Head Mod really is such a damn kindergartener
“Well, I have to do something like this. It was about time to pick a sub-mod anyway.”
I continued browsing the gallery under the soft light while rolling around on the bed FallenNobleDaughter had given me.
Picking sub-mods through conscription had been a traditional method of selecting sub-mods even in my previous life.
As a result, the gallery's atmosphere was a complete mess.
- As long as it's not me!!
- I've never played a more nerve-racking game of reading the room in my entire life lol
Please let it be just one person.
But please let that person be normal.
Amid that atmosphere, I deliberately stopped posting and even tracked down the gallery users who were lurking.
Title: It's me
Author: Head Mod☆
Don't think reducing your activity or lurking on purpose will keep you safe, no-no.
I might even add a charge of insolence and give you serious consideration.
Upvotes 999+ Downvotes 94
[Comments 212]
- Head Mod oppa... how could you do this?
- Ah; I was hiding so well
- Lol, the dark elves who were hiding are scurrying out
- Ah, those human bastards are going to run wild again...
- It was so cozy and nice...
ㄴ Beastfolk, come out too, hurry up lol
ㄴ Nice to see you, beastfolk lol
ㄴ The humans are suspiciously enthusiastic;
Of course, there was opposition too.
Not everyone enjoyed this atmosphere.
Naturally, since everyone was included among the conscription targets, anxious gallery users began posting complaints.
Featured post) Head Mod really seems like someone who's never been in the military
Conscription, my ass.
Do you think suddenly announcing conscription without any advance notice is going to go well?
It will definitely fall apart or go off course later.
I guarantee Head Mod has never served in the military.
[Comments 73]
- Seriously lol
- Ah lol, what country runs conscription like this?
- Do you really think it's normal to drag perfectly fine people into becoming sub-mods, Head Mod?
ㄴ Head Mod☆) Yeah, seems so?
ㄴ ???
ㄴ He's saying something weird again lol
ㄴ Head Mod☆) No, seriously, in the country I lived in, everyone had to go as soon as they became an adult
ㄴ Head Mod☆) Of course, I went too
ㄴ Head Mod☆) .
ㄴ Head Mod☆) Ah, fuck, now I'm suddenly remembering that time. Why did you make me recall that shitty memory? Want me to forcibly make you sub-mods so you can relate?
ㄴ ??? Wait, seriously?
ㄴ I'm truly sorry
ㄴ Wait, is he serious? His reaction is weird
ㄴ What country did you even come from...
But I could counter all of those objections with facts.
I actually did it, though?
If that bothers you, I can make you like that too.
Thanks to that, all opposition disappeared from the gallery, leaving only a hardcore game of reading the room.
It seemed only a matter of time before someone was left facing the terrifying choices of gallery deletion or lifetime sub-modship.
The gallery's seconds ticked by coldly, as though it were standing on thin ice.
Title: It's me, yeah
I picked one sub-mod.
They don't write shitposts.
And they have no experience firing tactical nukes.
I selected them based on these perfectly valid reasons. Everyone, congratulate the new rookie sub-mod.
Upvotes 999+ Downvotes 0
[Comments 999+]
- Lololol as long as it's not meeeeeee~~~ lololol as long as it's not meeeeeee~~~ lololol as long as it's not meeeeeee~~~
- It's so sweeeeeet~ My teeth feel like they're going to rot~ It's so sweet~ It's so sweet~ My teeth feel like they're going to rot~ It's so sweet~ It's so sweet~ My teeth feel like they're going to rot~ It's so sweet~
- Dad, I don't want to become a sub-mod! Dad, I don't want to become a sub-mod! Dad, I don't want to become a sub-mod!
By around evening, I managed to discover one promising talent.
Everyone in the gallery reflexively checked beside their username once, then was swept over by relief at having survived.
Maybe it was because the nerve-racking experience had caused everyone to release a massive amount of endorphins before death, but the comments were a sight to behold.
- So who is the sub-mod, Head Mod?
I personally replied to the relatively normal comment I spotted amid them.
I had been planning to reveal the sub-mod, so I was just about to reply.
ㄴ VampireTillDeath★: Hello, everyone. It's me, the cute vampire.
The talent I had personally selected just before kindly left a reply.
For a moment, all commenting stopped.
After a long silence, one comment broke the stillness.
- Ah, fuck, we're screwed
- I'm leaving the gallery first. Good luck, everyone
It was VampireTillDeath, a self-proclaimed thousand-year-old vampire and progenitor with a somewhat bizarre gimmick.