Chapter 1
Chk, chiiik―….
A spark flies from the flint.
With a whoosh, the flame blooms and illuminates the dim room.
I light the cigarette between my lips and draw in a deep breath.
I frown at the acrid smoke filling my lungs and the pain that makes them feel as though they are shrinking.
"Hoo――…."
The snow-white smoke I exhale with my sigh brushes against my face before scattering.
Perhaps it is the acrid cigarette smoke, or perhaps it is my troubled heart. Tears stream down my face, and I shut my eyes.
Sssss….
Along with the sound of the cigarette burning, a gentle warmth circulates through my body while a chill traces my entire body.
After breathing in and out with the smoke several times, my lips grow hot. I open my eyes and stub out the cigarette, burned down to the filter, in the ashtray.
The ashtray is already overflowing, but I don't care as long as I can put out the fire.
Then I take out another cigarette, put it between my lips, and light it.
My stomach churns, and the world spins before my eyes.
My head throbs, and my strength drains away as if my body is sinking beneath the surface of the water.
I close my eyes, letting myself get drunk on this drug-like dizziness instead of sleep.
How much time has passed?
When I open my eyes again, sunlight is seeping through the gap in the blackout curtains covering the window.
When I reach to the side, my hand finds a cigarette pack gone cold.
I must have bought it not long ago, but it is already empty.
"Haa…."
The sun is rising again.
For me, all the light I need is this little lighter's flame and a cigarette ember.
Another morning comes.
All I need to churn up my insides is acrid cigarette smoke.
A new day.
Another goddamn day has begun.
"…."
I set the lighter down beside me and pick up an accessory far too flashy for words.
The only thing with any color in this colorless room filled with gray smoke is the dazzling accessory.
It is an accessory that gives off an unidentified sweet scent instead of the smell of gas and cigarettes.
An utterly repulsive object glows in my hand, sending me a nauseating sense of happiness just from holding it.
I slowly close and open my eyes, and the scent of camellias fills the room instead of cigarette smoke.
Every smell and sensation grows distant. Emotions that are not mine wash over me.
As I drift away from reality, my lethargic body grows light, and a vague hope settles in my mind.
Discomfort follows. Even that lasts only a moment. When I open my eyes again, the room is dyed in intense colors.
"Yaaawn~! Good morning, myong! Ah! Seo-ah!! You smoked again, myong!? I told you cigarettes are bad for you, myong!"
Yoo Seo-ah (兪徐娥).
That's my name.
A small doll with rabbit ears says my name while flying frantically around me.
This isn't drugs or a hallucination. It's just the goddamn reality.
The magical girl's mascot, Myo-a (卯兒).
"Let's give it our all today, myong!"
"…Shut up. You're making my head hurt."
"Myo, myong…."
I glared at Myo-a over that obnoxious verbal tic until it finally shut up, then gave up.
It wouldn't change anything even if I hit it or cursed at it. Paying attention would only wear me out.
I transformed solely so I could go outside.
I can't go outside without this.
I opened the window instead of the front door and leaped outside.
Using empty air as a foothold, I soar through the sky.
Nothing holds me back.
For a brief moment, I exhale breath instead of cigarette smoke, savoring that sense of freedom.
Aaaaooo――――!!
"Ugh…!"
I frown and clamp my hands over my ears as a shrill, tearing sound pounds against my hearing, which is several times more sensitive than usual.
"Monster alert, myong!! We have to head out right now, myong!!"
"I know, so shut up already…!!"
I was already sick of the noise, so I grabbed Myo-a, buzzing beside me, and threw it far away before flying wherever my instincts led me.
Magical girls can instinctively tell where a monster is.
Apparently, that ability exists because it would be too late to act if they had to wait for a report that a monster had appeared somewhere.
That brought me to the middle of the city.
[Shaaaak!! Kyaaaah!!]
A beast-type monster was rampaging, its bulk slightly larger than a one-story commercial building.
It looked like a cat, but its twisted form had multiple eyes and teeth far larger than necessary.
"Aaaah!!"
"R-run!!"
"When is the magical girl coming?!"
I hesitated for a moment at the formulaic screams and lines, then charged at the monster.
"Lance Charging Mode."
Killing a monster isn't difficult.
After all, monsters are living creatures too.
Smash its head, and it dies. Pierce its heart, and it dies.
It dies if it loses too much blood, and it dies if its entire body is burned.
They're no different from humans.
Crunch!!
The sharp, elongated lance pierces the monster's head.
The tip of the lance tears through flesh and advances, crushing the skull.
It grinds through the squishy brain and creates another hole on the other side.
I flew like a single bullet and pierced the monster's body with my own.
A monster's body is soft.
Not compared to a human's, of course, but to a magical girl, it is just as soft.
Naturally. Being a monster doesn't make it anything extraordinary.
It's merely a beast that has grown far too large and warped into something alien.
[Mraaaow….]
Was it instinctive?
The monster let out its last breath and gave a small death rattle.
Thud―…
The monster's body soon collapsed to the ground, spraying blood mixed with brain fluid and fragments of brain in every direction.
Blood and pieces of brain clinging to my body drip down one by one.
Every breath fills my lungs with the foul stench of blood.
I feel sick.
I want to sit in front of a toilet right now and throw up everything in my stomach.
But I can't.
"Waaaah!! It's Black!! Black is here!!"
"Krr…!! To take down that huge monster in a single blow…!! That's Black for you!!"
"Kyaaaah!! You're so cool, Black!!"
I force a smile at the citizens' cheers and wave to them.
A monster lies dead before their eyes, blood and brain fluid streaming from it, but no one pays any attention.
More precisely, they don't need to.
Thanks to a magical girl's 'magic,' all of this looks like dazzling glitter to them.
Not blood and entrails, but flowers and sparkles.
But I'm not a magical girl.
The hand I wave before my eyes is caked with the blood and flesh of the monster I killed.
At my feet, a crushed skull spills its brain across the ground, and a huge eyeball rolls around.
Even while looking at it with my own eyes, I have to smile.
I have to smile.
Because that's what the citizens want.
I am the herald of hope, Magical Girl Black.
"That was an amazing performance, myong!! Black really is the strongest magical girl, myong!!"
"…."
Shut up. I said shut up.
I never became a magical girl or the strongest because I wanted to.
I wanted to grab Myo-a and throw it away, but with the citizens watching, I held back and kept waving.
"Then I'll be going now! Do your best today too, everyone!!"
"Thank you, Black!!"
I said things I didn't mean, waved my hand, and flew into the sky.
As soon as I was away from the scene, I went straight into an empty alley and ended my transformation.
Drip, drip….
The brain matter and blood stuck to my transformed clothes vanished in an instant, but the brain fragments left on my weapon spilled onto the ground.
"Urk…! Blerghhh!! Hack, hkkk…. Uwaaaak!!"
"Myong…. Seo-ah…. Are you okay, myong…?"
"How could I be okay…! Urk, I can't…!! Blerghhh!"
I hate this. I really hate this.
I hate this kind of thing now.
I hate pain, and I hate killing monsters.
I hate smiling in front of other people, and I hate throwing up where no one can see me.
I only wanted to live an ordinary life.
Why…. Why am I….
"Hang in there, myong! Thanks to you, Seo-ah, the citizens can live safely, myong!!"
"…Fuck."
"Y-you mustn't use bad words, myong!!"
"Shut up…. I-I'm done for today…. I'm going home… home…."
I staggered back, transformed again, and flew into the sky.
I returned home as quickly as possible, immediately ended my transformation, and went into the bathroom.
I washed, washed, and washed again.
Until the smell of blood clinging to my body was gone.
Until my skin came off and handfuls of hair fell out.
Only when my snow-white skin had reddened and grown raw, with blood beginning to bead on it, did I finally stop showering and leave the bathroom.
I put on only comfortable shorts and a T-shirt and rummaged through the drawers for cigarettes as usual, but nothing turned up.
"The cigarettes…. I was out…."
The cartons of cigarettes I had stocked up on were already gone because I had smoked all night.
I hated going outside so much I could die, but I had to go.
Without cigarettes, I wouldn't even be able to get something resembling sleep.
I sighed, put on a long coat, and opened the door to go outside.
Thud!
"Eek!?"
"What the…."
Could it be someone who came to my house…?
I should apologize first….
Thinking that, I opened the door and saw someone standing in front of it, rubbing their forehead….
No.
"Ah, um…. Is this Ms. Yoo Seo-ah's house?"
I was rendered speechless by an angel.
The person standing before the door wasn't an angel metaphorically—they were a real angel with wings.
* * *
I fired off 5,700 characters at that crazy-ass author who runs magical girls ragged.
They told me to manage them myself, then threw me into the story as an angel that didn't even exist in it.
I came looking for Black, the one in the worst shape—that is, Yoo Seo-ah—but….
"What… who are you…?"
Their condition seems worse than I thought.
Hmm. Cigarette smell.
No, that's not it. I should introduce myself first.
"Hello, I'm an angel! I'd like to talk for a moment――"
Bang!!
The door slammed shut.
…Was that not it?