Chapter 43
“Mm! Only the final procedure remains. The inspection will be over soon.”
<I shall perform it faithfully!>
He was standing at rigid attention.
I raised a hologram in midair and pretended to operate it as I spoke.
“How about standing with your arms spread? I need to check your physical specs precisely.”
<Understood!>
With all six hands neatly folded together, he looked ready to obey any order.
Treasure Keeper followed my instructions without a word of complaint.
Its arms spread wide to either side.
‘I really wish he would…’
‘He looks like a tardigrade…’
I alternated between looking at its body and the nonexistent report, diligently pretending to write something.
“Mm! The physical examination is complete!”
Then I opened my inventory and scattered a little over ten thousand gold coins at its feet.
“Thanks for following my orders so well. This is a bonus!”
<Oh! Thank you, Inspector! I shall count the gold coins after you have left!>
Ah.
This was bad.
‘...So that means it won't use its waves anymore?’
But it was within the range I'd expected.
It couldn't be helped. I had no choice but to move on to the more direct third step.
I spoke smoothly.
“Mm! Now that the physical examination is complete, all that remains is the ability test. Use your detection ability.”
I didn't even look at it.
I tossed it out casually.
As if it were nothing.
As if it were a routine procedure.
But.
It replied like this.
<Inspector... I beg your pardon, but I don't think I should expend any more keys...>
“… ”
I was stumped.
I immediately continued, undaunted.
“Hm? Are you saying you refuse to follow the inspection?”
At that, it hesitated.
It was visibly flustered.
“… ”
Silence fell.
What would happen if I pressured it any further here?
That would be the last resort.
“All right… You don't want to, huh? I'll just leave it blank for now.”
First, I tried persuasion.
“But I've confirmed that your detection ability is extraordinary. I was planning to submit a positive report to the higher-ups. What a shame, huh?”
I dangled the bait.
“If your evaluation goes well... you might even be transferred to a better post! Then you could get out of this Floor 100 where you've been rotting for five hundred years!”
I thought that would pique its interest.
After all, it had been trapped here the whole time.
<...I beg your pardon, Inspector, but I have no interest in leaving this place. I am exceedingly fond of this golden space.>
Its arms were drawing inward.
It didn't seem interested at all.
I was astonished.
“No, but… you've been trapped here working for five hundred years. Isn't it hard? You really have no interest in the outside?”
<Not in the slightest!>
‘Was it a workaholic…?’
I slowly nodded with a solemn expression.
“Congratulations. You've passed the next test already.”
<Pardon...?>
“What I just said was actually a question to test your loyalty.”
I continued, closing the hologram panel stylishly with one hand.
“If you'd shown even the slightest desire to leave Floor 100, I was planning to strip you of your position as gatekeeper immediately.”
<…>
“Your loyalty has now been conclusively verified!”
I blathered on.
Then its shoulders began to heave.
<Ah…!>
All six hands simultaneously touched the floor as it bowed at the waist.
<That is correct! I, Treasure Keeper, harbor no selfish desires whatsoever beyond defending this golden vault in accordance with His Majesty the Demon King's command!>
“Good, excellent. Another reward. Here, take it. This time, it's one hundred thousand gold!”
Shrrrattle-!
I opened my inventory and once again showered money over the pile of gold coins on the floor.
<Oh! I am truly grateful, Inspector, that you would take such consideration of me!>
It was extremely pleased.
“… ”
But once again, it didn't count them.
I'd given it ten times as much, too. Without showing any disappointment, I changed the subject.
“You really like gold coins, don't you?”
<That is so!>
“So you have no complaints working in a place with so many gold coins?”
<Of course not. I can only thank you for showing me such consideration!>
It answered, nodding repeatedly.
Its hands were folded politely.
…As I watched it standing there quietly, a strange emotion began to stir inside me.
‘What on earth does it live for?’
Five hundred years.
For five hundred years, this creature had been cooped up alone in this sealed golden room.
For four hundred of those years, it had been training alone while waiting for intruders who never came.
Needless to say, it didn't have a gallery either.
I asked.
“Isn't there anything you want? In my capacity as inspector, I can grant just about any reasonable request, so tell me.”
<No! I am satisfied just as I am!>
“No, how can you not want a single thing in your whole life? I said, speak freely.”
<I truly am! I have no complaints or desires whatsoever!>
“There really isn't?”
<Yes! There is not!>
My competitive spirit was roused.
When someone acted this stubbornly, it only made me want to dig deeper.
“I have to inspect your assigned area and submit a report, but if I leave even the grievances section blank, the higher-ups will question my ability as an inspector. Tell me just one thing, no matter how trivial.”
At that, it fidgeted and stroked its disheveled hair.
<I truly...>
“Tell me.”
Its massive torso flinched.
Its six arms wandered aimlessly through the air, then a tiny voice finally emerged.
<Th-there is one thing, but... it is nothing at all. Guarding this place is an honor to me, so...>
So there was one thing.
What could it be?
“What is that one thing? Tell me.”
<That is...>
It continued to hesitate.
It didn't seem inclined to say it.
‘This must be a side effect of throwing around “It was actually a test!” so much.’
“……”
Just then.
A rapid flash of brainstorming from the gallery members passed through my mind.
The cutest idea among them.
It came to me.
It came to me.
“Want me to guess?”
<Pardon...?>
I stepped forward and stared straight at it.
“You’ve been bored all this time, haven’t you?”
<…!>
At that moment.
It suddenly curled its toes.
Soon, the long disheveled hair covering its face began to grow wet, starting from around the crown of its head.
Drip, drip.
Before long, an unidentified liquid began dripping from the ends of its wet hair.
Confused, I asked, having no idea what was going on.
“You… why are you doing that?”
<Sob... sniff...>
No sooner had I asked than the monster's shoulders began to tremble, and a mournful wail suddenly burst out.
“Uh…”
It was crying.
<How do you understand my heart so well, Inspector...!>
The huge monster covered its damp face with all six hands.
<Inspector... I... I...!>
<I have been so terribly lonely these past five hundred years...! All those years spent guarding this place alone and doing nothing but training... and you realized it before I even said anything, Inspector... Sob, sob!>
Tears fell without pause, soaking the pile of gold coins.
It was sobbing as though utterly heartbroken.
‘Just how lonely has it been…?’
I'd guessed correctly, but it was still rather absurd.
I soothed it in a gentle voice.
“You've worked hard. After struggling alone for five hundred years, it would be cold-hearted if your only reward were gold coins. I'll play with you.”
<You... will play with me?>
“Yep!”
At my words, the dampness around Treasure Keeper's crown dried up.
It seemed incredibly happy to have someone to play with.
I added more dopamine for it.
“I’ll give you money if you win the game, too. How about ten thousand gold?”
<You would give me as much as ten thousand gold?!>
Thump!
Its massive body jumped once in place, so excited it couldn't contain itself.
Just as I thought.
Something it liked plus something it wanted—it couldn't help but go wild.
Treasure Keeper, now extremely enthusiastic, said:
<Is there nothing I need to wager?>
“No. We're just playing.”
At that, it thanked me profusely again.
At this point, it seemed to regard me almost as a god.
<What shall we do together?>
When it asked that excitedly,
I made the first proposal.
The moment I'd been waiting for.
“How about hide-and-seek?”
<What is that? I am ignorant, so...>
Of course it didn't know.
“Hide-and-seek is...”
I explained all the rules of hide-and-seek.
But then its body suddenly went rigid.
“…?”
It was extremely unnatural.
For some reason, its excitement seemed to cool in an instant.
Even though it had been quite excited just moments ago.
Perhaps even for it, the game was too childish and boring.
In particular, its shoulders visibly flinched when it heard “hide in the piles of gold coins.”
“……”
‘Oh.’
I think I get it.
Realizing what was going on, I said:
“Ah, of course, I won't touch that.”
There could only be one reason it disliked hide-and-seek.
In this space.
It had something hidden.
I waited for it to speak next, guessing that much.
The moment felt longer than any before it.
Soon, Treasure Keeper spoke.
<Ah, you naturally know about the lock's existence! I was rude to worry needlessly, Inspector.>
‘Hit the mark.’
I had to forcibly suppress the corners of my mouth as they tried to twitch upward.
I had found the real way to use up the keys.