Chapter 32
On the way back after getting thoroughly beaten by Father.
Even though I was just beaten to a pulp, I feel fine. If anything, I feel like laughing.
Why? Because I'm on my way to see Celin with a famous specialty brought up from the south.
Thinking of Celin's smiling face seemed to bring a smile to my own face as well.
They're glutinous rice cakes that cost 10,000 shillings per box.
I bought them because thinking of the soft, chewy rice cakes reminded me of Celin's cheeks.
Knock, knock-
"Celin. Big Brother's here."
There was no answer from inside the room.
Wondering if she was asleep, I carefully opened the door.
In the middle of the room, Celin sat with her eyes closed, concentrating on something.
Mana rippled faintly. What was she doing? She must have been practicing magic.
I approached Celin with my footsteps silenced.
Even when I watched her from right beside her, Celin didn't sense my presence. Her concentration was incredible.
Even the mana radiating from her tiny body felt remarkably dense.
"Phew......"
Before long, Celin exhaled a cloudy breath and regulated her breathing.
I scrutinized Celin through narrowed eyes.
A condensation of magical power faintly formed and vanished inside her body.
'She made another half-star.'
Creating two stars in such a short time would be impossible even for a talent beyond all standards.
Even forming half a framework like this was already a remarkable feat.
A wondrous talent so incredible that even the word genius was insufficient.
Perhaps because she was still steeped in the afterglow of mana.
Celin still seemed unaware that I was there.
I quietly took out a glutinous rice cake and lightly pressed it against Celin's cheek.
A rice cake met a rice cake.
"Eek?!"
Celin's shoulders shot up.
She looked at me with her eyes wide, then glared at the rice cake touching her cheek.
Chomp-
She bit into the glutinous rice cake with her tiny mouth.
A great deal of white starch powder clung around her mouth and the tip of her nose.
Munch, munch- Her small, moving lips were adorable.
"Is it good?"
"Yes! It's incredibly delicious!"
The corners of Celin's eyes curved pleasantly. Even the white powder on the bridge of her nose twitched.
"They say it's really famous in the south. I bought it especially for you."
I tugged at my sleeve and carefully wiped the powder from around her mouth.
Celin obediently held still while continuing to chew.
Her hair had become disheveled from sweating just moments before.
I picked up the comb resting on the bedside table.
While Celin ate the glutinous rice cake, I gently combed her hair and asked quietly:
"Aren't you pushing yourself too hard?"
"It's nothing compared to you, Big Brother. I have to work hard too!"
She answered in an exaggeratedly spirited voice.
Even though she pretended otherwise, anxious urgency lingered at the end of her voice.
I smiled bitterly and stopped combing her hair.
"What's driving you?"
The jaw joint that had been twitching abruptly stopped.
Celin swallowed the rice cake and tilted her head.
"What do you mean......?"
"There's no need to hurry. You can take your time. Just follow your interests. I'm saying you only need to do it when you're enjoying yourself."
Celin fell silent with her lips pressed tightly together.
I didn't urge her to answer. I simply waited.
"I'm an illegitimate child, Big Brother."
Celin's gaze slowly lowered toward the floor.
"Sister and Big Brother devote yourselves to the family, working yourselves to the bone. You both endure all sorts of hardships......"
Celin, who had been looking at the floor, raised her gaze. Her faint, fragile smile turned toward me.
"Compared to the two of you, there's nothing I can do. I'm just a burden here."
My sister had gone north, while Big Brother roamed the south, risking everything.
Meanwhile, Celin felt guilty for settling down like a hothouse flower.
I had suspected it for a long time.
Celin had been undervaluing herself and destroying her own self-esteem.
"Even the family head has no expectations of me."
Celin had never once been able to call Valdemar Dad.
To her, this was not a warm family, but a meritocratic household.
Within that fence, Celin had grown increasingly cowed.
"My blood may be less pure than yours... but I'm still a Cardenos by blood. You two are working so hard, so I can't just sit around either. I want to work as hard as I can."
Celin forced herself to smile brightly.
I could see how precarious that smile was.
The past. No—the future, perhaps.
Why she had fallen and become a terrible witch. And why she was destined to fall.
Why she had destroyed House Cardenos, and why she had been forced to kill Father and Sister.
What Celin wanted was the warmth and affection of a family, along with recognition as one of its members.
"Celin."
I began gently combing Celin's hair again.
"You're my little sister before you're an illegitimate child. My one and only little sister."
Celin turned her head and stared blankly at my face.
"What does the stigma matter? No matter how you change or where you are, you're still my little sister."
Even when she became a witch.
The entire world called her a monster, but to me, she was simply my hurting little sister.
I had plunged a blade into my little sister's heart with my own hands.
I had no intention of repeating that regret ever again.
"Part of the reason I work this hard is the family, too."
The destruction that's coming. Saving this world is my ultimate goal.
Then why do I want to save the world?
For my own sake? If that had been the only reason, I would have given up long ago.
"I'm trying to dress you in pretty clothes, feed you delicious food until you're stuffed, and make you happy."
Even now, sitting face-to-face with Celin, it felt like a dream.
A bloodstained face. The pale afterimage of the past.
Every time I touched her cheek, I felt relieved.
Because I felt warmth rather than a cold body.
"So don't let things fester inside you. If you're having a hard time, rely on me anytime. You can act spoiled and complain. That's neither embarrassing nor wrong."
Celin was my greatest pillar of support.
It was my duty to take responsibility for her and protect her, and her relying on me was the joy of having a little sister.
Because she existed, I could advance toward the greater cause without wavering.
"—Sniff!"
A sudden nasal whimper.
I stared at Celin with my eyes wide open.
With her eyes squeezed shut, Celin rubbed the sides of her nose with the back of her clenched fist. Even that was adorable.
I gently stroked Celin's small head.
Celin lightly grasped the hem of my sleeve. With her other hand, she took out a glutinous rice cake and held it up to my mouth.
"Try it, Big Brother. It's delicious."
It was obvious she was trying to change the subject with the rice cake.
"I don't need to eat it. Why would I, when something much better is right here?"
I gently pushed the rice cake away.
Instead, I pulled both of her plump, pale cheeks outward.
The feel was far softer and squishier than a glutinous rice cake, clinging to my fingertips.
"Aw, you adorable little thing. You're softer than a glutinous rice cake. I could just take a bite."
"W-wait, j-just a minute......"
Celin tapped my hand repeatedly. Sensing her urgency, I immediately let go.
"Sorry. Did I hurt you?"
"No, no. That's not it."
Celin placed her fingertips on a glutinous rice cake.
Pinch, pinch.
After prodding it a few times, she tilted her head while looking at me.
"This is softer, though?"
"......"
"Wouldn't you rather touch this one......?"
Hmm.
I couldn't take it anymore.
"This won't do. Let's take a bite."
"Eek-"
After that, I went on squishing Celin's cheeks.
Celin was always the one being touched.
With that assumption so firmly lodged in my mind, my mind went blank when Celin first stretched out both arms.
"?"
"Heehee......"
Fiddle, fiddle-
Celin's hands worked over my cheeks as though they were clay, imitating my movements.
Well, well. Looks like she doesn't like being the only one on the receiving end.
"Big Brother's skin is tough and rough. Like jerky."
"That's because I don't take care of my skin."
"No, that's not it. It's because you've been through so much."
Tap, tap-
After kneading my cheeks, Celin gently patted them. It seemed like she was praising me for something.
"You've worked so hard, Big Brother."
It felt like our positions had been reversed.
Out of spite, I squeezed her cheeks inward with both hands.
Her cheeks scrunched inward, making her lips protrude like a goldfish.
Then I pulled them outward instead.
The area of Celin's cheeks expanded to nearly twice its size.
"B-Big Brother… I-it hurts......"
"You little glutinous-rice-cake-marshmallow-mochi-joraeng-tteok-meringue-baby-dumpling-soft-bean-cake cheeks."
"I don't know what you're shaying......"
"I just said you're ridiculously adorable."
She kept groaning grumpily, but the corners of her eyes were curved into crescents.
She wore a blissful expression, as though she could die from loving this Big Brother of hers.
Celin filled my heart a little more.
***
The family head's office lay in silence.
Buried beneath a pile of documents, Valdemar pressed his fingers to the bridge of his nose.
A splitting headache came surging in.
He was already being worked to the bone by Rosenthal's relentless and vicious retaliation.
"......Are you causing me trouble too?"
He was speaking of Astin, who was not present.
To make matters worse, his own son had caused an incident at the Founding Festival, leaving him with no patience to spare.
Phew-
He let out a sigh deep enough to make the earth cave in.
Valdemar set down the quill he had been holding.
No matter how much he racked his brains, it wasn't something that could be solved immediately.
He pushed the documents aside and leaned back against the chair.
He covered his weary eyes with the back of his hand. Now was the time to rest.
A silence without a single sound.
Moonlight streaming through the window settled over his face. His profile gleamed pale.
Valdemar narrowed his eyes. The cold moonlight caught his gaze.
"......"
The iron bars of the underground prison. Moonlight rippling between them.
Whenever the full moon emerged from behind the clouds, the scene from that day was painted over reality.
Valdemar opened the double-locked secret drawer at the very back of his desk.
He carefully took out and held an old picture he had kept hidden.
A picture set against the backdrop of the Cardenos estate.
A young boy holding a wooden sword and a young girl wearing a flower crown smiled brightly.
The corners of Valdemar's lips trembled faintly.
It was a time when neither of them carried any burdens. A time when they were each other's entire world.
Unforgettable voices echoed like hallucinations.
―Maru! Give me your hand! I'll put the flower ring I made on it!
Sometimes in the bright voice of his childhood friend, laughing innocently.
―Lord Valdemar. May boundless glory grace your future.
Sometimes in the solemn voice of the lord to whom he had sworn an oath.
―Valdemar. How did we end up like this?
Sometimes in the frail voice of a woman who had turned away from a love that could never be fulfilled.
His memories surfaced in chronological order.
When he traced them back into the past, her end rose before him like a promise.
Valdemar was dragged back to that night more than a decade ago.
―Valdemar, my knight.
The two of them faced each other with cold iron bars between them.
She sat on the cold floor, shackled and handcuffed.
Her blue eyes were as clear and transparent as a summer sky. Her dazzling blue hair scattered in the wind.
Her appearance was wistful and vivid, as though he had seen her just yesterday.
"......"
Suppressed emotions trembled. Valdemar's jaw shook.
Heat rose to his throat, choking him.
In the deepest abyss within Valdemar's chest.
She remained sunk there, anchored in place.
His fingertips tenderly caressed the girl's cheek in the picture.
He was so careful, as though she might break at the slightest pressure.
She had been that kind of woman.
She had stroked his rough calluses, fretting as if they were her own.
She would lean against his shoulder beneath the shade of a great oak and fall sound asleep.
Whenever they played hide-and-seek, she would hide behind a tree and giggle without even realizing that the hem of her skirt was showing.
He missed her smiling face so terribly that Valdemar could not escape his thoughts.
―Please don't forget me. Forgive me for this terrible selfishness.
Had her final words become a curse?
On every night of the full moon, Valdemar had to draw her out from the depths of his heart.
―Valdemar, my knight. This is my final request before I die.
Her final appearance was devoid of color.
If the moonlight had been brighter, would she have had any color at all?
Tears fell from her blue eyes.
That single tear stained his heart to its depths.
―Erase my trace from that child. Let me remain your foulest stain. So that no one can ever suspect that child......
Valdemar squeezed his eyes shut.
When darkness swallowed his vision, his submerged heart rose to the surface.
Her face bloomed vividly in the darkness.
―The child's name is......
A colorless afterimage overlapped with it.
A child who bore a terrible resemblance to that woman. A blood relative whose platinum-blond hair concealed her true lineage.
―Name her 'Celin.'
Valdemar knew her all too well.
He had chosen the name 'Celin' so she could mirror his first daughter, Selena.
It was meant to signify that she should be cherished like his own daughter.
But that child was a sin that even her mother's death could not conceal.
"......Celin."
A pitiful child, left to languish in Cardenos all her life, receiving neither recognition nor expectations.
It was a bleak fate that left her no choice but to live that way.
Every time he saw her hunched shoulders, every time he saw her sorrowfully wavering blue eyes, his heart trembled.
"Please forgive me."
A grief-laden murmur dissipated into the empty air.
Valdemar buried his face in his large hands.
Beneath the man's trembling eyes, cold moonlight streamed down like tears.