Chapter 30
Late dawn.
I was tossing and turning in my personal room prepared inside the Magic Tower temple.
It was a place that High Priest Yodel had made with great fuss, saying that they could finally create a space for the Saint.
The bed was wide and luxurious, so it was comfortably soft, but I couldn't sleep properly.
I'm scared.
I didn't know when the Goddess might strike me with lightning at any moment.
What should I do?
All sorts of thoughts came to mind.
Should I issue a strict order not to look for me and disappear?
Yodel is a yes-man, isn't he? Won't he listen if I give an order?
No.
No matter how I thought about it, that was impossible.
If I disappeared, the poor would probably throw tantrums like children asking to find me.
Moreover, the Lilia Order members would say they need me too.
Even if Yodel was a yes-man, it was obvious that he wouldn't be able to ignore the pouring demands of the entire Lilia Order and all the poor people, and would eventually be swept up in the atmosphere and start looking for me.
I'd die either way.
So what should I really do?
How can I survive?
Does it make sense for someone without faith like me to rise to this position!?
The thriving Karma Company these days.
And this magnificent Magic Tower temple.
Everything I touched did well.
At this rate, I might really end up living as the Goddess' saint without any way out.
Living in fear of when I might receive divine punishment.
Is that how I'm going to live, really?
I can't sleep.
I really can't sleep today.
Maybe I'll feel better if I take a walk.
I left my room.
As I carefully went out to take a dawn walk around the slums, the changed appearance of the slums caught my eye.
The muddy roads that were full of filth and garbage were being neatly torn up and repaved with pretty bricks.
There were no more people sleeping on the streets now.
I heard that as many jobs were created, everyone could afford to stay in an inn or two.
I heard they were excited about the thought of receiving money for demolishing their houses and then moving into the houses that would be built there.
The air no longer smelled stuffy and rotten.
The sophisticated and fresh dawn air tickled my nose.
As I stood blankly on the road looking around for a moment, a question suddenly occurred to me.
Could it be that the reason the Goddess hadn't struck me with divine punishment yet, even though someone without faith like me has been acting as a saint for almost half a year now, was because I was doing the job too well?
Logically, I dug under the abandoned factory and found an elixir source that no one knew about before, and I purified the slums. I made people happy.
Thanks to that, the vast majority of people in the slums had become Lilia believers now.
At this point, I seriously wondered if the Goddess knew everything but was just letting it slide.
Even though I had no faith or anything, could it be that she was willing to overlook it a bit because I was doing the job this well?
No.
No joke.
Isn't this really the right thought??
Why didn't I think of this earlier?
Damn, my thick skull.
I felt like I had been unnecessarily scared all this time.
It was a moment when all my struggles to escape from the order felt like idiocy.
"Can't sleep, I see?"
As I was letting out a hollow laugh because it was so absurd, a familiar voice was heard from behind me.
Erpha was approaching me, waving her four arms that were like her symbol.
It's almost 3 AM, why are you still awake???
"I was going to take a walk... The streets have changed so much that I was just looking around for a moment."
At my words, Erpha approached me with a smile.
"It's all thanks to you, Saint. If it weren't for you, this would still be a dirty and ugly slum."
"I haven't done anything. To be honest, I'm just wondering... how things have gotten this big."
I really didn't know.
An insignificant person like me.
Did it make sense that I had risen this far with adult game abilities, which were skills at the height of vulgarity, of all things?
At my words, the witch carefully approached my side.
There was a fragrance.
Did she spray perfume?
Or does her body naturally smell like this?
A pleasant, fresh scent stimulates my nose.
"Would you allow me to hold your hand?"
I nodded.
The witch carefully holds my hand.
And she quietly kissed the back of my hand.
"You have the ability to move people's hearts. People don't call you a saint simply because you cure incurable diseases and look after the poor."
She said I moved the people's hearts.
Ha.
If they knew my true nature, wouldn't they all scoff?
What do you mean I move people's hearts?
I know better than anyone how selfish and...
foolish I am.
"I'm not such a great person."
"That statement. I was trying to destroy the world."
I flinched.
I glance at her carefully.
To be honest, she was still a nuclear bomb.
She had just changed her mind. The power to destroy the world was still inside her.
She had just extinguished the fuse that was burning in real-time on the nuclear bomb.
In other words, the elements that could be the driving force for an explosion were still inside her.
I looked at her face with anxiety, but Erpha's expression was too peaceful.
"I hated everyone. I hated the world that didn't acknowledge me, I hated my colleagues who mocked me, and above all... I hated myself. Why was I born with such a detestable appearance? When people threw filth at me. I was just thinking of burning down the entire empire along with myself. It was entirely possible with my research and the mana inside my body."
I know.
You would have recreated exactly the scene I saw in my dream.
"When you kissed my hideous left face, which was covered in filth. That's when everything changed. The resentment inside me. The hatred. It all just disappeared. If a being like you could love me. How could I hate myself? Maybe for the first time since I was born. It might have been the moment I started to love myself."
Erpha smiled.
Her smile was so fresh.
"It's funny, isn't it? Since then, everything has happened just as I wanted. The position of next Tower Master. The acknowledgment of my colleagues. And the downfall of the witch who hated and disliked me. It all happened so naturally. As if it was only natural. Things I couldn't have when I wanted and wished for them so much came into my hands so easily."
"I'm glad, Erpha."
"I probably could have fixed my face myself. The Three Primary Colors Research was for that purpose. To handle more powerful magic to fix my face. If I had been given just a month or two, I would have succeeded in fixing myself. But even if I had fixed it that way... When I think about whether I could have become like I am now. The conclusion is that it would have been impossible."
Erpha placed her hand on her chest.
"My heart. You changed my heart. That's something impossible even with magic. Saint. It was only possible because it was you. You say you're an insignificant person, but that's not true at all. You are a great person."
I suddenly realized that I had never had such a deep conversation with the nuclear bomb witch until now.
As we talked, gradually.
I felt the fear and anxiety I had about her inside me being diluted and disappearing.
Come to think of it, isn't it more ridiculous to worry that a woman who openly blushes this much while looking at me would suddenly twist and go berserk again?
Just earlier, I felt like an idiot for living in fear of divine punishment that wouldn't come down, and now I felt like an idiot for being afraid thinking that this woman who liked me so much would go berserk again.
I really...
Why am I so stupid?
"I'm certainly not a great person. I know myself very well. But still..."
I smiled at Erpha.
"I'm glad that many people can be happy because of me."
It wasn't a lie.
The streets of the slums had changed to be clean.
The children who used to sell matches in back alleys with their faces distorted from burns were now wearing nice clothes and going to school.
The nuclear bomb witch had been officially recognized as the next Tower Master and was standing around me with a happy smiling face.
Jonathan Karma's family was smiling happily too, and everyone including High Priest Yodel was gaining vitality in their lives thanks to me.
Of course, all of this stemmed from a lie born of misunderstanding and misconception.
But so what if it's a lie?
Isn't it more important that I made them happy?
No.
I'm not joking, really.
Isn't the Goddess just overlooking everything while knowing?
At this point?
Then there's no need to worry about receiving divine punishment and run away.
Although I don't have faith, I can just believe in the Goddess now and that'll be the end of it.
Then there's no need to worry anymore, and no need for any concerns or worries.
If everyone calls me a saint, isn't it enough for me to change my mindset and become a saint?
That was what I believed.
"The night is cold. Let's go back in..."
"Saint."
Erpha held my hand—unable to let go.
"I just want to ask... one thing. Please answer honestly."
"Yes. Please ask. Whatever I can answer. I'll answer without hiding anything."
"When you saved me. You said I was beautiful, didn't you?"
Yes.
I did.
It was a ripoff of a famous line from Grandpa Miyazaki's famous anime.
"In that meaning of beautiful... by any chance, even if it's just a little bit, just a tiny bit is fine… was there any meaning of me being beautiful as a woman included?"
The witch's face was red.
I had always looked at her with anxiety and fear, but now that those emotions had disappeared, I finally noticed her beautiful face that seemed to have charm magic built-in.
I was a heavy user of pixiv and toptoon.
No matter how amazing internet drawings were, I realize today anew that they were not more amazing than real women.
Smell.
Touch.
Appearance.
Really everything is perfect.
"It was included. I'm embarrassed, but even now I feel shy because you're so close. I've never seen such a beautiful person up close before."
A face with charm magic built-in!
It's amazing!
My mouth was spitting out that line without me realizing.
But honestly, think about it.
The feeling of a woman's skin touching your hand.
The thick body scent wafting over.
And a pretty-faced woman blushing at close range!
Can you endure this?
Can you really endure this?
The only time I've been this close to a woman before Erpha was just once.
It was in college.
I confessed to a junior I liked, but she said, "Senior, you're too nice, you don't suit me," and rejected me.
Later, when I was working part-time at a convenience store, I saw her coming out of a motel with a tall, handsome guy.
Oh shit!
Why did such a shitty memory...
Memory...
Uh...
Erpha's two upper arms wrap around the back of my head.
I saw her feet rising on tiptoe.
The face with charm magic built-in closed the distance in an instant.
And I felt a soft and moist sensation on my lips.
I could feel her lower hands holding mine trembling with tension and fear.
Even to me, a virgin, it was clearly her first time—incredibly clumsy.
It was more like a peck than a kiss.
She carefully separated from me.
"W-was it unpleasant?"
If any man can call that unpleasant, they simply have to be gay.
How could this be unpleasant?
"It's my f-first time kissing, so I think I was too clumsy..."
I stare at her blankly.
I knew she had feelings for me.
But I didn't expect her to hit on me so openly like this.
"It was my first time too."
It really was my first time, including both Korea and the Arcal Empire.
At my words, Erpha smiled.
"I'm glad!"
She kissed me again.
As I received that kiss.
Feeling her fresh scent tickling my nose, I thought.
Wouldn't it be okay to just live as a saint?
At this point?
It seems like the Goddess is turning a blind eye too.
I'll just live as a saint.
I even have a woman who likes me.
Now I too…
…can enjoy a happy isekai life.
I hesitated, then wrapped my arms around Erpha's waist.
I carefully pulled her towards me.
The smell in my nose was so ecstatic.
Around 3 AM.
On the empty street.
Like that, the two of us stood kissing for a long time.