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The Four Penguins of the Apocalypse

 

“Is this it?”

 

I looked at the door with tired eyes. It was a typical dormitory door. Room 306. The place where I’ll be living from now on. My so-called sweet home.

 

Getting here was quite difficult. In the novel, they just headed to the dormitory. It was a matter that could have been resolved in one line, but I had to search for it myself. The biggest problem was that the woman assigned as my guide disappeared, saying she was going to find her own room.

 

Well, I guess it’s fine since she went because she wanted to.

 

When I held the card I received before coming here to the door lock, it unlocked with a mechanical sound. As I entered energetically, there was just an ordinary dormitory room.

 

A size that was neither spacious nor cramped, a soft bed, and various furniture.

 

It was a typical dormitory scene. I hadn’t described the inside of the room in detail, so I was surprised to see it implemented in such a generic way.

 

“So this is a room for those ranked in the 1000s.”

 

The dormitory rooms at Justitia are divided by rank. The higher your rank, the better dormitory you can stay in.

 

For a last-place room, it wasn’t bad. While the place where Kim Taehyun, the first-year first-place student, stays could be called a palace, this space is satisfactory for a commoner like me.

 

I nodded and entered to unpack. There wasn’t much to unpack, so I just took off my school uniform jacket and hung it on the visible coat hanger.

 

“Well then.”

 

After that, I sat on the bed and decided to organize my current situation.

 

I’ve entered a novel. My task is to interfere with the protagonist. To do that, I need some level of power. There’s a limit to what I can do with words alone. If I can’t even properly hold a sword, it’s clear that I’ll die during practical training before I can even interfere.

 

So there’s one thing I need. Something that guy God, who’s a big fan of web novels, must have included.

 

I muttered softly.

 

“Status window.”

 

One second, two seconds, three seconds, ten seconds. Even after closing my eyes and counting to ten, I felt no change. The blue window that appeared when 「Magic Eye」 activated didn’t show up.

 

I broke out in a cold sweat and forced a smile. I must have said it wrong.

 

“Status window?”

 

Even when I called it as if asking.

 

“Status window~”

 

Even when I called it as if coaxing.

 

“Status window!”

 

Even when I called it as if angry, there was no response. The rotten smile on my face disappeared. No, it’s too early to give up. Even in web novels, they have different names, right?

 

“Status?”

 

[…..]

 

“Abilities?”

 

[…..]

 

“System?”

 

[…..]

 

“…. How about this, my information!”

 

[…..]

 

“….”

 

[…..]

 

I fell silent. A vein started to throb on my forehead. Despite reciting every type of status window I could think of, the blue window didn’t respond.

 

Is this bastard not even giving me a status window now?

 

Just as my thoughts reached that point and my anger towards God increased even more.

 

Ding dong─

 

A bell sound was heard.

 

“Who could it be?”

 

There shouldn’t be anyone coming. It’s the first day of admission. I don’t know anyone. There’s even less reason for anyone to visit.

 

Thinking that, I opened the front door and there was─

 

“What the?”

 

An angel. Blonde hair and blue eyes. A girl with heavenly beauty as if carved by God, her height reaching up to my neck, but her hair falling down to her waist. She was in a terrible state.

 

Her whole body was covered in dust. And dust was the least of it. She had twigs stuck to her body and even leaves on the crown of her head.

 

Did you roll around somewhere?

 

“God… Sunghoon… gave…”

 

“What? I can’t hear you. Speak louder.”

 

Raphael trembled her hands as if in humiliation. She kept her head down, unable to lift it. Her cheeks were puffed up, she really seemed to hate saying it.

 

“God!! Only gave Sunghoon-ssi a room!! No matter how much I looked, I couldn’t find my room. When I asked, they said I’m a commuter!!”

 

“Then you should commute.”

 

At my question, Raphael lifted her head. She had an incredulous look on her face.

 

“I just came to this world, you know? I don’t have a home or anything, you know? Are you telling me to be homeless right now?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

I said that and closed the door. I closed it with a bang, but a foot came between the door. It failed.

 

Doesn’t that hurt? There was a bang sound, you know?

 

“Hey? Sunghoon-ssi? You’re not misunderstanding something, are you? I’m an angel, you know? A seraph? The highest-ranking angel that ordinary angels can never reach. I’m a noble being, you know? Are you telling such a being to be homeless now? Do you have no blood or tears?”

 

Raphael said that while trying to open the door I was holding. I don’t know where she gets such strength from, I was resisting with my whole body.

 

“This is a male dormitory!!”

 

“Who do you think I came here for!! Open up!! Open it!!”

 

That’s that and this is this. I can’t let a woman into a male dormitory. It’s a problem beyond rules. My beliefs are telling me not to do it.

 

Don’t you know boys and girls shouldn’t sit together after age seven?

 

As I held the door with all my strength, Raphael’s voice was heard.

 

“That’s why you couldn’t even hold a girl’s hand until you were twenty-five!!”

 

“How do you know that?!”

 

“That’s not even the worst of it!! You imagine a rosy future with a part-timer just because your hands touched while receiving change at a convenience store, and you have delusions like ‘Doesn’t she have to take responsibility for taking my hand’s virginity?’!!”

 

Before I could finish speaking, Raphael fired off words like a machine gun. And that wasn’t the end. She wasn’t done talking.

 

She started blabbing about my dark history to the whole neighborhood. She seemed ready to start from elementary school and go all the way to university.

 

I had a lot of things I felt guilty about. A whole lot.

 

I don’t know how she knows all this, but my fists were trembling. There was only one thing I could do.

 

Swoosh. As my grip loosened, the door opened. Raphael, who had been leaning on the railing with her hands cupped around her mouth ready to shout, looked this way.

 

“Please stop…”

 

I got down on my knees.

 

***

 

“See, it would have been so much better if you had just opened up earlier.”

 

Raphael, who had changed into pajamas from somewhere, sat on the bed swinging her feet. When I asked where her luggage was, she just tilted her head.

 

I don’t need it either.

 

Suddenly pushed from the bed to the sofa, I read the red book I had snatched from her again.

 

It’s the resurrected God’s Notebook, patched up with tape all over.

 

“If you tear it again this time, I really won’t forgive you. Even if it’s the only way to return to the celestial realm. Got it??”

 

Raphael growled as she spoke. I just nodded vaguely. Except for the first 5 pages or so, there was a lot of helpful information, so I didn’t particularly want to tear it up. Rather, I was almost grateful to Raphael for putting it back together.

 

I read the book carefully. While there was a lot of helpful information, there were also crises.

 

[The name of the status window is [Menu]. You didn’t do anything stupid on your own, did you? If you read my notebook properly, I believe you wouldn’t have done such a thing. You’re not an idiot who would go around saying “Status window!” on your own, oh, excuse me. I’ll go have a laugh for a bit.]

 

“….”

 

That was dangerous. I almost tore it up. I closed the book under Raphael’s piercing gaze. I handed the book back to her, who was growling like a beast protecting its master.

 

After that, there was one thing to do. I lightly stretched my neck and muttered softly. So that Raphael couldn’t hear well. It’s absolutely not because I’m embarrassed.

 

“Menu.”

 

With that sound, a blue window appeared in front of my eyes.

 

[Status] [Inventory] [Skills]

 

Three of them appeared. I was surprised by the interface that made me feel like I had entered a game. Since he said he was interested in the mortal realm, I guess he likes games too.

 

I pressed Status firmly.

 

————————-

 

Name: Lee Sunghoon

Gender: Male

Age: 17(25)

Height: 176cm

Weight: 64kg

Unique Magic:「Magic Eye」

Abilities:

[Physical Strength (Lowest)] [Muscular Strength (Lowest)] [Agility (Low)] [Magic Power (None)]

Magic: 「Empty Slot」, 「Empty Slot」, 「Empty Slot」

 

————————-

 

A screen not much different from what I received during the physical examination came into view. The new things were the magic slots, the change of magic power from [Unmeasurable] to [None], and the existence of 「Magic Eye」.

 

The magic power is not surprising at this point, and since magic is directly connected to magic power, it’s natural that there’s none. Without hesitation, I pressed on Magic Eye.

 

[「Magic Eye」: Eyes that see mana. Can visualize mana, the source of magic power, and see its flow.]

 

An explanation came up.

 

“Hmm.”

 

I stroked my chin. I understand that I can see mana. I also understood that the strange things I saw earlier were the flow of mana.

 

But.

 

“What about the goblin that disappeared?”

 

The goblin that my blind sword hit disappeared. It happened when I touched the flow. It seems that it doesn’t just see the flow of mana, but something happens when you touch the flow.

 

“I’ll figure that out gradually.”

 

Based on the information I read in the [Resurrected God’s Notebook], I pressed Inventory. Honestly, any 21st century South Korean man would know how to use this.

 

A square inventory interface appeared before my eyes. It looked exactly like what I had imagined. When I put my hand in, it smoothly entered the empty space.

 

“Huh? What are you doing?”

 

And Raphael watched this scene with curiosity. I’m curious too.

 

Of course, there was nothing inside, so I couldn’t feel anything. I got up and picked up a piece of tableware from the dining table and put it in.

 

[Spoon X1]

 

“Oh.”

 

As I marveled at the inventory that even displayed the quantity, Raphael approached. She looked at my hand sucked into empty space as if looking at something interesting.

 

“Put this in too!”

 

She handed me the notebook I had returned. Since I couldn’t refuse, I took it and put it in the inventory.

 

[God’s Notebook]

 

This one doesn’t count as quantity. Is it because there’s only one in the world?

 

“Can I do this too? Huh?”

 

Raphael asked, tapping her feet. I was curious too, so I roughly pointed to where the interface was.

 

“Try it.”

 

As soon as I said that, Raphael reached out her hand, but it just passed through. It seems only I can touch it.

 

“….”

 

Looking at her hand that had passed through, Raphael’s cheeks puffed up. She looked at me with a sullen expression.

 

“What do you want me to do?”

 

“Never mind. It’s not interesting at all. I’m not curious. You look like a mental patient doing that with something invisible.”

 

Raphael turned her head as if sulking. Then she went to sit on the bed. Whatever.

 

I put my hand back into the inventory and took out the spoon. This time I could feel it being grasped. Just thinking ‘I want to grab the spoon’ made only the spoon grabbable, not the book.

 

“….”

 

Raphael glanced at the spoon in my hand and turned her head again. I ignored her again and restored the spoon, then picked up a nearby desk and put it in.

 

Surprisingly, it went in smoothly. Raphael, who had about three exclamation marks over her head, watched, but I ignored her again.

 

[Desk X1] [God’s Notebook]

 

I pondered a bit on how to take out the desk. I just thought, I want to take it out. Then the desk poured out from empty space. Luckily, I avoided a disaster by pulling my feet away just before they were crushed.

 

This is the [Agility] that’s the only stat not at [Lowest] but at [Low].

 

Amazing. Me.

 

“Pfft.”

 

Finding my show funny, Raphael let out a sneer. When our eyes met, she snickered as if she couldn’t hold it in.

 

You want to try this, don’t you?

 

Actually, I didn’t like you from the celestial realm. That bed is mine too.

 

Did they assign the wrong guide? I’ve never heard of a guide making their guest sleep on the floor.

 

“What?”

 

Raphael asked. I silently walked towards the bed. Then, I put the bed into the inventory. As the object she was sitting on disappeared, Raphael floated in the air.

 

After that, what happens is, well, obviously one thing.

 

“Eek!”

 

Raphael fell on her butt spectacularly. I let out a sneer and returned exactly what I had received.

 

Then Raphael glared at me with tears welling up in her eyes. It was a resentful gaze, but what can I do?

 

“You wanted to try it, right?”

 

“Nothing wrong with that.”

 

There’s an old saying. A bed is something you conquer.

 

***

 

To cut to the conclusion, I lost. And spectacularly at that. It wasn’t even a fight.

 

Thinking about it, it was obvious. Raphael received an A rank in the physical examination. As for me? F rank.

 

I picked a fight I couldn’t win. And the price was steep.

 

My back, which had to sleep on the sofa, hurts too much.

 

“That’s why I asked, why did you challenge me?”

 

“There are times when a man must fight even knowing he’ll lose.”

 

“You mean to say ‘idiot’, right?”

 

“…..”

 

I walked silently. The loser has no words.

 

We are currently walking on a road. An asphalt road with cherry blossoms in full bloom. The scenery heralding spring evoked a bit of nostalgia.

 

It felt strange to be experiencing with my whole body the cherry blossom-lined path to school that I thought I’d never see again after high school, or rather, university.

 

“By the way, are you really going to do it?”

 

Raphael asked, taking quick steps to get ahead of me. The falling cherry blossoms combined with her beauty created an amazing picture, but I felt no particular emotion. Anyone would feel the same if they saw what this one does.

 

“As opposed to what, doing it fake?”

 

“I don’t think it’s a good idea.”

 

She clicked her tongue and pouted. Apparently, she doesn’t like the idea of interfering with the protagonist.

 

“How about helping the protagonist like in other novels? Let’s just ride the bus. The protagonist goes kaboom! and clears the path, and we just follow behind eating up the items, you know?”

 

This one, she knows these things surprisingly well. I guess she’s seen and heard a lot of bad things while assisting God. I shook my head.

 

“That would be doing exactly what that human, no, that god wants. Absolutely not.”

 

“Tch.”

 

As Raphael clicked her tongue, the academy building came into view.

 

I looked up at the building of this academy where the distance between the dormitory and the school is far due to its ridiculously large grounds. The majestic size was enough to make my neck hurt, but it was worth seeing.

 

“This is Justitia.”

 

As I looked at the scenery of the building where it will be a sea of fire for the next 3 years, where events will explode like crazy centered around Kim Taehyun, where it will never be comfortable to attend even if it’s tough.

 

Suddenly, I felt a sense of discomfort. Wasn’t the journey here too peaceful?

 

Would that damn god let the first day of school on the first day be this comfortable? No.

 

Then what is this peacefulness? I looked at Raphael who had arrived late.

 

Raphael frowned as if to ask what I was looking at.  But then, she realized what was off.

“Hey, you two first-years over there~”

Three guys, who might as well have been advertising, “Look at me, I’m a thug,” waved their hands.

Only then did I nod in understanding.

Yep. This is how it’s supposed to go.

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