The Healing Process of Wounds, and Memories and Tears

Minsu emphasized to me once more, 'If anything dangerous happens, you absolutely must call me.' I was still a little frightened because I couldn't forget the shock caused by that criminal, so I simply nodded. He also said that, if I was all right with it, I could ask Jiyeon unnie to let me stay with her for a while. I considered it for a moment, but something like this could happen again in the future, and I didn't think I should impose on someone else's home every time, so I decided I'd contact him only when I was in real danger.

"Something unpleasant happened today, but I hope you still have a good day. I don't know what kind of house you prefer, so I'll call you again later."

"Yes, thank you. Goodbye."

I wanted to see Minsu off to the first floor, but after what had happened, I was afraid to go outside, so I only waved goodbye. After some time passed, I went into the bathroom to shower and looked in the mirror. My hair seemed to have grown even longer in the meantime. I thought it had originally reached my shoulder blades, but now it came down to around my waist. Was it because my hormones were still so active...? At the hospital, they had said that since it hadn't been long since my body changed, I should think of it as going through another growth spurt.

I should go to a hair salon too, shouldn't I...? Women's haircuts were expensive... I had barely spent any money on grooming before, but now I had no choice but to start spending it. Haa... Instead of staying home alone like this, maybe it would be better to wait for the time to come, go to school, and make at least one friend.

"Oh, someone's calling. It's Minsu. Yes, hello?"

[As I mentioned earlier, is there any particular layout or other feature you would like in a house?]

"Hmm... I'd like the bathroom and shower room to be separate. It would be even better if the house were well soundproofed."

[Understood. I'll look for something as close to that as possible.]

"I don't insist on having exactly that kind of house, so anywhere a little farther away from here would be fine."

[Yes. Oh, and I think Jiyeon should know what happened to you today. Is that all right?]

"Yes, that's fine. But please tell her that I'm perfectly fine so she won't worry too much."

[Understood. Have a good day.]

"You have a good day too, Minsu~"

*

I was relieved that work at the hospital wasn't busy today. Last week had been difficult because work was so hectic, but Jia's presence had brought me a little healing. But Jia had been discharged... so now I was returning to my ordinary routine. Well, nothing seemed to be happening today either, so I could hang around for a while and go home after work... Huh? A call? It was from Minsu. I stepped outside for a moment to answer it.

"Yes, I'm answering."

[Hello, Ms. Jiyeon.]

"Yes. Did something happen to Jia?"

[......Yes.]

"W-What happened?"

[After Jia and I finished what we needed to do at the courthouse and came out after lunch, I felt someone blatantly following us. I told Jia that I would protect her and pulled her toward me.]

"Could it be...?"

[I had felt the stalker's gaze from the moment we entered the courthouse, and Jia said she had felt it too, so I suspected something might happen. As it turned out, he was indeed a sex offender. He called out to Jia at first, but when she ignored him as I told her to, he insulted her by calling her a whore. When I stepped in front of her, he threw a knife toward Jia, so I caught it.]

"Are you all right?!"

[Yes. The knife only grazed me, and nothing happened. Jia was so startled that she sank to the ground, but I kept her safe. I had also called the police before the criminal charged at us, so he was arrested on the spot.]

"It's a relief that nothing serious happened, but if something like that occurred, Jia must have..."

[She must be having a very hard time... But we'll be there for her, so it shouldn't become a major problem.]

"Yes, it shouldn't. I have to go back in now, so I'll hang up."

[Sorry to have bothered you. Have a good day.]

The hand holding the phone trembled. I had been worried because Jia's appearance was striking enough to attract attention, but I had never imagined that a criminal would openly charge at her. I would have to make sure she never went out alone again. As soon as I got off work, I had to call Jia first.

*

Oh? I got a text. Ah, it's from Jiyeon unnie. 'Can you talk right now?' Minsu must have called Jiyeon and told her about what happened today. I called her.

"Jiyeon unnie!"

[Are you okay...?]

"Yes, I'm fine. You should be more worried about Minsu than me. I was only insulted, but Minsu was hit by a knife..."

[Minsu said he's fine too, that it only grazed him. More importantly, I heard that you were very startled, Jia.]

"Yes... I was so startled that I sank to the ground. I can endure being cursed at with vulgar words, but that man charging at me with a knife was so frightening... I thought he would just attack us, but when the knife he threw at me struck Minsu's hand and I saw blood, I was really... really so shocked, sob... I thought he'd been hurt because of me... sob..."

[...Jia, you did nothing wrong. Don't try to understand a criminal's actions. They aren't human. Jia, are you okay?]

"Yes, I'm okay. Hearing your voice is calming me down a little."

[Your voice sounds like it's trembling a lot. Eat something delicious today and get plenty of rest. Is there anything you want to eat?]

"Hmm... If it's all right with you, I'd like to eat something you cook, unnie."

[Really? If Jia wants it, I can make you anything! I'll buy the ingredients after work.]

"Yes, thank you!"

The call with Jiyeon unnie ended. I had nearly cried while telling her what had happened today, but after talking about pleasant things with her, I felt as if my mood had improved.

"But something feels strange... My lower abdomen hurts a little. What is this...?"

It wasn't severe pain, and it wasn't time for my period yet, so I decided to browse the internet while waiting for unnie to get off work. 'Should I try that?' At this size, it seemed possible. Let's see...

"Oh, it worked. This is actually pretty comfortable."

I lay down and placed my smartphone, which was playing a Dibib video, on my chest, and the screen was positioned perfectly for me to see it. This really works... Maybe I should get a café drink to go later and place it on my chest to drink. It seemed like it would be perfect for drinking while playing a game. At this size, there was more than enough cushioning, so it seemed stable too.

"This is giving me such a reality check... I've only been a woman for how long, and I'm already thinking and doing things like this... Hyaah?!"

The phone resting on my chest began to ring. 'Whoa, that startled me. My chest feels numb...' Maybe because it was so sensitive, the vibration made it tingle. It felt a little prickly too.

"Hello~?"

[Jia, you're at home right now, aren't you?]

"Yes, I was watching Dibib at home."

[You watch Dibib Shorts too?]

"These days, watching game videos is more fun than playing games, so I was watching one."

[Ahaha~ I know what you mean. Watching them is more fun too.]

"Where are you now? I'll come out to meet you!"

[No, stay inside. Something happened today, so stay in the house. I'll be there soon.]

"Yes, unnie!"

The doorbell rang ten minutes after the call ended. I saw Jiyeon unnie on the intercom, so I opened the door right away. She came inside carrying meat and various ingredients.

"Jia. You must have been very startled, right?"

She set the bags of groceries in the kitchen, then took my hand and spoke.

"Yes, a little... No, I was very startled..."

I couldn't control my trembling voice. The memory of what had happened was still so vivid that it felt as if it had just happened, and a trembling voice spilled from my lips.

"I'm sorry, Jia. I'm sorry I couldn't be there with you..."

"It wasn't your fault, unnie. That criminal was the one who did something wrong... A kind and pretty unnie like you did nothing wrong."

Without saying anything, unnie quietly embraced me. Tears were flowing from both my eyes and hers. When I was a man, even if I was sexually harassed, I had only felt annoyed and flustered; I had never felt helpless or shed tears. But a woman's body was definitely weak. I had already been an F cup, but now it felt as if the minimum amount of emotion needed to make me cry had dropped even lower... And there were simply more things capable of emotionally shocking me than when I had been a man.

"But anyway, unnie! Let's eat dinner! You must be tired from work, so let's eat together."

"All right. Thank you, Jia."

I stood beside unnie and helped her cook. She began stir-frying the meat. It took her some time to come from work to my house, and there weren't any proper side dishes here, so she had bought the other dishes too. I hadn't bought a rice cooker, so we only had instant rice... Still, we unfolded the dining table and got everything ready, then ate together a little later. A real man's staples were spicy pork, tonkatsu, and gukbap. It seemed unnie had prepared them especially with me in mind.

Next time, I should cook something for unnie too. What should I make for her today...? Since work must be exhausting, a shoulder massage would probably be good, right? Unnie was fairly busty too, so combining that with work must make her quite tired... As I was thinking about it, my phone rang. It was a message notification from the game.

'Please help me.'

...Help them? Were they stuck in a dungeon? What could they possibly want that they had to leave a message for someone who had already logged off? I was starting to get annoyed. Were they the kind of person who thought about marriage after receiving one favor? Even if a lot of time passed, I had no intention of marrying a man—or even dating one—anytime soon.

"Jia unnie, I'll do the dishes."

After unnie and I finished eating, we cleared the dishes, and I washed them. Once I finished, I washed my hands thoroughly and loosened them up for unnie, who must have been tired.

"? Jia, what are you doing?"

"I'm going to give you a massage, unnie."

I made a few popping sounds with my hands, which seemed to startle unnie. I sat behind her, took hold of her shoulders, and began massaging them. A sound like 'Mmh...' escaped her lips. This was more embarrassing than I had expected...? I was doing something kind, but it also felt like I was doing something naughty.

"Thank you, Jia. My shoulders feel much looser thanks to you."

"Hehehe, it was nothing."

"But, Jia."

"Yes?"

"I think your shoulders must be more sore than mine."

"What??"

I wasn't sure what unnie was talking about. I was totally unemployed right now, so there wasn't much to tire me out... Well, I wasn't physically tired, at least.

"Hngh, uh... Unnie?"

"This... When you think about this, don't you think your shoulders must be even sorer?"

Jiyeon unnie pressed down on my breasts with her fingers. I was so surprised that a strange moan escaped me without my realizing it. Jiyeon unnie smiled mischievously and touched my breasts.

"My shoulders feel much better thanks to you, Jia. This time, I'll loosen yours."

"Thank you, unnie. Hehe."

"Wow... They're really badly knotted. How have you been enduring this?"

"Is it... really that bad?"

"Yes. They seem to be several times my size, and your shoulder tension is several times worse than mine."

When I heard that, I felt my face turn bright red. I simply closed my eyes and quietly received unnie's shoulder massage. Unnie said, 'Even while you're getting a massage, the way they keep bouncing makes it look like your shoulders are suffering terribly.' Honestly, they were heavy and difficult to manage. Even when I moved around the house normally or walked slowly outside, they bounced so enormously that my hips weren't even in the same league. The reason I was gradually accepting this body was probably mostly because of my breasts. I was aware of them no matter what I did; even breathing made me distinctly conscious that they were there...

"Thank you, unnie. Honestly, they shake even with the slightest movement, and even when I just breathe, I can feel that they're there... So my shoulders are a little... hehe..."

"...I'm fucking jealous."

"Huh? What did you say? I couldn't hear you."

"Pfft, it's nothing."

Unnie spoke with a radiant, happy smile. Seeing that bright face made me smile too. After receiving unnie's shoulder massage, I started to feel sleepy...

"Jia's getting sleepy, isn't she? You can sleep for a little while. I'll wake you up."

Unnie's lap touched my head... So sleepy...

*

Why were Jia's breasts so huge...? If she gave me just a little of them, wouldn't I be able to join the ranks of women with enormous breasts? Mine weren't exactly small either... But next to Jia, they looked like the breasts of a middle schooler who had only just begun to develop...

For no particular reason, I became mischievous and pressed and touched Jia's breasts. Hearing her cute moans made teasing her feel strangely satisfying. Jia seemed to be gradually falling asleep while receiving her massage, so I simply let her use my lap as a pillow. She fell asleep so adorably that I could almost see the letters 'Zzz...' floating above her.

"I have to go home too, so I should put her to bed before I leave."

I lifted Jia and laid her down, then covered her with a blanket. She groaned, 'Unnie... Don't go... I'm scared...' Was she having a nightmare? In any case, I wondered whether Jia had now fully accepted that she was a woman, or whether today's incident had forced that acceptance on her... Whatever the answer, it was heartbreaking.

"I hope tomorrow's psychological counseling helps her heal somewhat... Good night, Jia."

I hugged Jia, who continued to groan in her sleep, and patted her back before leaving her home and heading back to my own.

*

"Unnie... Huh? Was it a dream?"

I clearly remembered massaging each other immediately after dinner yesterday evening... but I couldn't see where unnie had gone. The sun was already up, so how long had I slept? There was also a text from Jiyeon unnie on my phone. 'Jia, you were sleeping so deeply that I put you to bed and left. You wouldn't wake up even when I tried. Wash up as soon as you wake up and contact me. Let's go to psychological counseling today.'

"Ah, right. Psychological counseling. How long did I sleep...?"

I think I went to sleep without even brushing my teeth... How embarrassing... I should wash up right away...? But why had there been so much discharge...? They said that, just as men became erect when stimulated, women produced discharge when stimulated too, but was it normally this sticky?? It didn't seem like it... Was this another aspect of having such a sensitive body...?

"Haa, I don't know. I'll just wash up first... I feel so gross..."

I brushed my teeth and showered as soon as I got up, and felt refreshed. Washing my hair was still a little difficult every time, but after drying it and looking in the mirror, I felt somewhat better. I had once seen a post on an online community that said if your face was pretty, looking in the mirror could improve your mood when you felt bad. But it was really true... After drying all this long hair, looking in the mirror seemed to ease the trouble of washing and drying it.

"Oh, it's unnie. Hello~?"

[Jia~ Are you up? Have you washed?]

"Yes, I just finished drying my hair too."

[Then could you come to the hospital by 10 a.m.? Your psychological counseling has been scheduled.]

"Yes, I'll be there on time."

Psychological counseling... I wondered whether I really needed it, but when I thought about what had happened yesterday... I probably did. It had been such... a tremendous shock.

*

I took a bus to the hospital, went to the reception desk on the first floor, and gave them my name.

"Ah, you must be Jihoon. Go up to the seventh floor. Jiyeon will be waiting for you."

"Yes, thank you~"

My name change hadn't gone through yet, so being called by my old name felt extremely awkward. Since this was a hospital, they probably had no choice but to use the name on the paperwork. I took the elevator to the seventh floor and met Jiyeon unnie, who smiled brightly and waved at me in greeting.

"You're here? There's a professional counselor inside. If you're okay with it, shall I stay beside you, Jia?"

"Since you're my legal guardian, unnie, I'd like that."

I said this as I took unnie's hand, the hand of the person who had agreed to become my guardian, but her face was somehow a little red. She seemed embarrassed. Unnie said, 'I took some time off for your counseling, so you don't have to worry about the time.' Holding Jiyeon unnie's hand tightly, I opened the door to what I assumed was the counseling room and saw a male counselor inside. What I needed right now might be an objective counseling session, so I didn't dwell on it.

"Please sit on this sofa."

"Ah, yes."

"Is the nurse beside you your guardian?"

"Yes, I'm Jia's guardian."

"I see. Then, if Ms. Jia is comfortable with it, we'll conduct the counseling with her guardian present. Is that all right?"

"Yes, that's fine."

The counseling began with me holding Jiyeon unnie's hand in one of mine. Nothing about the content was particularly unusual. He asked what had happened before the illness manifested and my body changed, what the situation had been when I opened my eyes and found myself in the hospital, and how I had felt when the doctor told me, 'Your sex may change.'

"When I heard that my sex might change, I honestly didn't believe it. That sort of thing only happens in comics or novels created from someone's imagination. I was very sick, but I never imagined that my body would change to that extent."

"And how did you feel when you woke up and found that your body had changed?"

The counselor spoke in a cautious voice.

"...It didn't feel real. I thought it was a dream or perhaps virtual reality."

I answered calmly.

"I see. Then when did you realize that this was reality?"

"The bathroom. I went in because I couldn't exactly have an accident, but... it wasn't there."

"...That must have been a tremendous shock."

"It was. I knew it was reality, but it still didn't feel real to me."

The counseling continued. At one point, I was asked to say what came to mind when I looked at certain words or pictures, but honestly, I wasn't sure what to make of it. The counselor said that my case was so unusual that this wasn't a typical situation, but he had tried it anyway. Later, he asked why I had decided to say goodbye to my family and what had happened with my friend. The hand of the unnie holding mine was trembling, and my own voice was trembling badly too, so it seemed that my emotions had reached her as well.

I told him about riding home with Minsu, discovering my friend waiting in front of my house, resting at a café until I confirmed that my friend had left, and then going home. And... about meeting my parents on Saturday night, when they treated me like someone they had never seen before; pretending to be a stranger too and acting as naturally as possible; then collapsing on the first floor and crying...

"Sob, my parents couldn't, hic... recognize me, and sob... they treated me like someone they'd never seen before, so I gritted my teeth and tried to treat them as calmly as possible, as if I were meeting strangers too, but after my parents had completely left, I entered the building and saw myself in the mirror on the first floor... Haa, haa... Uuugh... sob... Waaah!!"

Unable to finish what I was saying, I finally burst into tears. Jiyeon unnie hugged me tightly with my back turned to the counselor. Tears poured from her eyes onto my shoulders too. I simply couldn't hold back my tears, so the counseling was paused for a while. We decided that I should calm down and rest, then resume the session after lunch.

Jiyeon unnie's body was trembling along with mine, and she simply cried with me. I sobbed and wailed, while Jiyeon cried with me and gently comforted me, saying, 'It's okay... It's okay, Jia. Just think of it as having a nightmare, at least for now. Let all your feelings out as much as you need to.'