Chapter 68
This is the aftermath of what happened.
“Ah, Nord…… You’re back……”
When I returned to the inn room, Fran was mending a pitch-black robe. She looked so haggard, as if she’d worked without even blinking after seeing me off, that I was startled.
“Fran? Did something happen while I was gone?”
“Nothing in particular…… I’m making some clothes that can hide my identity, too. I’ll need them if I’m going to travel with you, Nord.”
Fran unfolded the robe she was holding. It hadn’t even been half a day since I left, but it looked almost finished.
Had she really skipped meals just to work on the robe? I dropped the bag I’d brought and sat down in front of Fran. I hadn’t thought she’d push herself this hard because of me.
“Fran. Nothing happened to me today. Look, I got the thesis back, and everything went smoothly. You don’t have to rush to make this.”
“Nothing happened?”
Stare──.
Fran scanned me from head to toe with vacant eyes.
What was that? Did dwarves have psychometry, too? Fran stared at me like that for about ten seconds, then tossed the robe aside.
─Flutter.
Then she pointed to the mat laid out on the floor.
“Mr. Nord.”
“Y-yes?”
Her expression was utterly blank.
And she was using honorifics.
The atmosphere felt ominous. When I froze stiff, Fran quietly pointed at the mat in front of her.
“Sit.”
“Yes.”
It wasn’t a question, so I obediently sat in seiza. Fran and I knelt facing each other.
Fran spoke without changing her expression.
“Mr. Nord.”
“Yes.”
“Did absolutely nothing happen to you?”
“Y-yes? Well, I think what counts as ‘nothing happening’ differs from person to person.”
My eyes darted around. The bastard who’d told the bandit chief not to roll his eyes wasn’t here. I was Nord, not Arthur Wayne.
“Don’t lie. Did absolutely nothing happen to you?”
“…………Something happened.”
After a long bout of agonizing, I came clean.
Like a death-row inmate confessing to a nun.
“Mr. Nord.”
Fran said, still seated in seiza.
“From now on, imagine things exactly as I tell you.”
“Yes.”
“Your beloved partner has to go somewhere dangerous for some reason, but you can’t go with her, so you’re left alone at the inn.”
“Yes.”
“You spend your time worrying about when she’ll come back and whether she’s hurt, doing little chores and promising yourself you’ll go with her next time. Then your partner returns, hiding her battered body and lying that nothing happened.”
“Yes.”
“You know full well that she’s lying for your sake, of course, but imagine that your beloved partner, while hiding her own injuries, is instead trying to worry about you, who did nothing while she was gone.”
“I’ve imagined it.”
“How would that make you feel?”
I put all my imagination into simulating it.
What if Fran went off to Germania alone, then came back with her face wrapped in bandages and smiled, saying nothing had happened?
“I’d feel sad, guilty, and pathetic.”
“That’s exactly how I feel right now.”
Good heavens.
My mouth clamped shut. She was scolding and teaching me so clearly and gently. Could Fran become the best mother in the world?
Maybe a child born between Fran and me would polymorph into a Confucian dragon. Like an imugi ascending to heaven with a dragon pearl in its mouth.
Fran watched me quietly as I sank into deep anguish, then stroked my head.
“Were you wrong, or weren’t you?”
“I’m sowwy, Chairman Mao……”
Nord, the otherworldly macho man, had just experienced the greatest remorse of his life.
I felt even worse than when I was a kid playing pogs with my friend and summoned a card that let me attack directly, then actually smacked the poor bastard with it.
Back when I dreamed of becoming the Duel King, you could chalk it up to childish impulsiveness. But this time, I was a grown man who’d hurt his lover with a selfish lie. I felt utterly pathetic.
─Squish, squish.
Fran held me to her ample chest and stroked my messy hair.
“Nord. I’m grateful that you worry about me. But when you worry about me, I’m worrying about you, too, you know?”
Fran whispered gently into my ear. Held against my girlfriend’s ample bosom and stroked by those heavenly hands, I almost felt like I was being held by the Virgin Mary.
“So please. Don’t try to shoulder too much by yourself, Nord.”
“I’m sorry.”
“As long as you know. I trust you, Nord. I’ll work hard, too, so I can help carry your burdens.”
Buried in her soft cleavage, I hugged Fran. The Professor Slayer inside me subdued the Dongleaconda that had raised its head without understanding the situation.
‘Thank you, Professor Slayer.’
This heartwarming mood had almost turned into a hot one-night stand. I pulled away from Fran’s embrace and drew her into mine.
“I love you, Fran. I’m so glad I have you.”
“I feel the same.”
We held each other for a while, then pulled apart. Fran gave me her usual giggling smile. Ugh. My Fran was so cute.
“Ahem. So, Fran? You haven’t had dinner yet, have you?”
“No. You said you’d be back before it got too late, so I waited without eating because I wanted us to eat together.”
“Good. Get up and get dressed. Something nice. Let’s go eat something delicious.”
“Hehe. Because you had such a hard day?”
Fran stood up, picked up her clothes, and laughed, so I straightened my shoulders and shook my head proudly.
“No. Big brother made a lot of money today. On days like this, we should eat something delicious and expensive.”
“For real, bro?”
“Let’s not do that.”
Bantering with her, I took Fran to a restaurant. It was one of the places I’d found whenever I had some free time.
“Hweeh?”
My adorable girlfriend’s smile grew stiffer as the streets became more and more splendid. Then she froze in front of the enormous restaurant like a village girl hit by a basilisk’s petrifying beam.
“W-w-wait? N-Nord? We’re going here? This place looks really expensive!”
Fran was visibly repulsed by the dazzling establishment. I gave her a wry smile.
This was just my guess, but given the environment she grew up in, my girlfriend probably hadn’t visited many upscale restaurants in her life.
Fran had run away from home and lived day to day, hadn’t she? She probably had to weigh the cost-effectiveness of her meals, enough to become a gukbap fanatic if she’d been born on twenty-first-century Earth.
‘I know, since I was the same way when I was too young to work part-time.’
When I was in middle school, I’d walk thirty minutes to a cheaper supermarket just to save 500 won on snacks or meat. I even used to hang promotional flyers on my bedroom wall.
I was sure that the reason I’d gotten looser with money as I grew older and started earning more was a reaction to living that way as a kid.
Since I’d been like that myself, I wanted Fran to have experiences like this often.
‘Sometimes it’s important to spend money like this.’
On a day when a lump sum came in, it was only proper to help stimulate the market economy by splurging on something expensive and delicious.
“It’s not that expensive. I looked into it, so I know. And I’m treating you today, so don’t worry.”
“Y-you looked into it? When?”
“Whenever I had time?”
I answered vaguely and put a hand on Fran’s shoulder. Together with the hesitant Fran, I went inside.
I’d said that, but this wasn’t such an expensive restaurant.
‘I’ll have to dress my Fran up in a cute outfit and take her somewhere truly high-class.’
The more upscale the restaurant, the higher the caliber of its clientele. If we showed up somewhere like that in shabby clothes, we wouldn’t even be able to tell whether the food was going in our mouths or our noses.
It would only leave us with embarrassing, unpleasant memories, so I’d chosen a place with a normal dress code and clientele, but delicious food and reasonably high prices.
Someday, I’d dress her in a gown and take her to a fancy restaurant with a bouncer at the door.
I snatched the menu from Fran just as she tried to check the prices and ordered for us.
“Nord. Is it really okay for me to let you treat me to somewhere this expensive?”
“It’s not a treat. What’s mine is yours.”
“I-I’m happy you say that, but……”
The amazing lineup, from cheese and steak to pudding, left Fran hesitating until the very end. But when I started eating leisurely, she followed suit and began eating, too.
“──Ah. It’s delicious.”
Fran’s eyes widened, and about ten minutes later, she was savoring the pudding so much that her body trembled.
“Is it good?”
“Yeah! I’ve never eaten anything this sweet in my life!”
Seeing Fran so happy made the trip worthwhile. Of course. People who aren’t used to it can learn to adapt to luxury, too.
We ate our fill of the course meal. What surprised me a little was that Fran ate more than I expected.
I hadn’t realized it because she was quite thin aside from her chest and butt, but it seemed Fran was a bigger eater than I’d thought.
I should feed her delicious food more often from now on.
It wasn’t like an adventurer who worked her body every day would get fat, anyway.
***
That night.
I made sure Fran was asleep, then went out into the streets barefaced.
I wandered through dark alleys before sitting on a bench in the central plaza. A long line of cats followed behind me. They were strays I’d lured with food.
“Nyaunyah? (Who’s this human?)”
“Nyaaang. (He says he’ll feed us.)”
“Nyaa? Myaaaang! (Food? Yay!)”
Apparently there was some sort of plant cats in this world loved, but I didn’t know if it was sold in this city, so I lured them with dried fish instead.
I personally loved cats a lot—after all, cats and dogs were why I wanted to become a veterinarian—so I was happy to see them swarming around.
‘Though it’s a nuisance to the other residents.’
Back on twenty-first-century Earth, people who kept feeding strays like this were called cat ladies and looked down on, weren’t they?
I’d been harassed by them myself, so I hated that type of person, but today was an exception.
No, to be precise, ‘starting today’ was the exception.
From this day forward, I was Nord the cat dad.
“Nyaa, myaang. (Eat up.)”
I tore up some dried fish with my gloved hand and tossed it.
The cats started picking up and eating the fish I’d thrown. A few even pounced at the fish in my hand.
“Hnyaaang…. (I want that….)”
“Nyat. (No.)”
I pushed away a cat trying to climb onto me with its dirty paws. Then the little bastard suddenly smacked my leg with a kitty punch.
─Smack!
The little shit, apparently dissatisfied with something, sucker-punched me, jumped down, then started eating a piece of fish that had fallen.
People who hate cats apparently call them aloof idiots or adorable little pests. I kind of understood how they felt.
“Nyaaang, hmyang? (Do you want more?)”
“Nyanya─. (Yeah─.)”
The cats all started acting cute at once in response to me. These little guys were adorable. I chuckled and said,
“Hnyaa myaang. (Then I have a favor to ask you.)”
“Myaa─? (A favor─?)”
The cats stopped acting cute and focused.
In cat language, I told them to wander around the area and let me know what they found. In particular, I asked them to look out for people who gave off a ‘scary feeling.’
I also promised to buy a really delicious meal for any of them who brought me especially useful information.
“Nyanya─! (Okay─!)”
“Nyanya─! (Okay─!)”
“Purr, nyaaa!! (Yummy food─!)”
The cats excitedly took the fish and scattered on their own. I’d meant to tell them not to get into trouble and piss off the residents, but before I could finish, the little shits wolfed down the fish and made a run for it.
“Just like Khajiit raised on stealing fish.”
Once the cats scattered, I was alone in the central plaza. I stretched, then fanned my flushed face.
‘Fuck. It’s so embarrassing for a grown man to go meow-meow…….’
That was why I’d gathered them at night on purpose to play cat dad. It was best if no witnesses saw Nord the cat-eared muscle macho man’s meow-meow lesson. Unless I wanted to bite my tongue and die, that is.
─Flap-flap!!
As I cooled my face in the chilly night air, an owl suddenly descended from the sky and landed in front of me. It turned its head 180 degrees to look at me, as if it had caught the smell of my bag.
“Hoot─? (Meat─?)”
The creepy movement and huge eyes frightened me a little, but I summoned the grit of a veterinary student and pulled out some chicken.
“Hoot-hoo? (Want some?)”
“Hoot-hoo. (Yup.)”
Since it could understand me, it was kind of cute, too. I burst into a hearty laugh and tossed it some meat. The owl thanked me and chomped away.
In this way, I wandered around the city feeding the animals.
It was all part of a process to obtain a sort of information network.
As I’d realized again through this exploration, being able to talk with animals was pretty useful. The animals wouldn’t arouse suspicion, and I could put them to work in droves for a simple reward.
I’d known about this, but until today, I hadn’t used it.
Well, obviously, for fuck’s sake. What would I even do with information about the city?
Pop out in front of some secret society lurking in the shadows like a detective and yell, ‘There’s only one truth!’ only to realize I had only one life, too?
And until today, I hadn’t known the <Animal Communication> spell existed, so I thought I might get stoned to death as a heretic if anyone caught me playing patty-cake with animals.
The anti-pagan movement that started in Romania was the fantasy-world equivalent of the stereotypical witch hunt, faithfully following the doctrine of human rights: ‘Trash isn’t human, so it’s fine to kill them.’
Just like old Earth, where you’d get beaten to death the moment someone branded you a commie.
Since even the people of the New Continent weren’t sure what they believed, they got away with the excuse ‘We’re not pagans, so screw off.’ The Kitai were practically in the gray zone, just one step short of black, to the Inquisitors.
‘That’s fucking poetic.’
Anyway, as an outsider, if I went around acting up without thinking about the consequences, I could get fucked over pretty badly.
From my perspective, of course I had to be careful.
But it turned out that there was a perfectly legitimate spell called <Animal Communication>.
<Animal Communication> was probably a spell like <Familiar>, one that ‘stays in effect semi-permanently after being cast once.’ Tirsi hadn’t found it strange when I kept talking without using mana.
Tirsi probably thought the animals I’d talked to in the mountains were ones I’d tamed in the past.
It seemed the spell required building up affinity beforehand, but I could just claim I’d done that long ago.
Who could complain if I said I’d built up their affinity and cast the spell beforehand? Just chatting with animals probably wouldn’t get me branded a heretic anywhere.
‘So that’s why I decided to try it starting today.’
After wandering through the city and handing out treats to the animals (figuratively speaking), I returned to the central bench and sat down.
“……Haa, fuck.”
There was a reason I’d gone out and done all this so late at night.
Earlier, after returning from dinner with Fran, I’d deciphered a document among Tabula’s belongings. It was something I’d taken while searching through the robe buried in the ice coffin.
It was written in code, but my translation ability deciphered it with ease.
The fact that my translation ability could even decipher a code that wasn’t a ‘language’ gave me a vague idea of how it worked, but that wasn’t the problem.
Even if I translated the code by myself, I couldn’t present evidence that it was true, so it wouldn’t help. Just like an ancient document would have no value as an academic paper if you deciphered it but had no proof it was authentic.
More important than that was the document Tabula had been carrying.
I unfolded the black document──no, the ‘orders.’
[List of designated assassination targets.]
It was an order issued by Tabula’s organization.
It listed only names, but it was undoubtedly an order to find and kill the people on the list.
Since this existed, the shadowy organization Tabula belonged to really did exist, and it wasn’t just an exaggeration by Tirsi and me. Fuck. Good thing I’d destroyed the bandit hideout and cleaned up afterward.
─Fwoom.
I set the paper on fire with <Burning Hand>. It had been tough enough to stay intact inside the ice coffin, but it was no match for the flames and turned to ash.
─Whoosh.
The wind carried the ashes far away. I leaned back against the bench, pressing down my tousled bangs.
‘……Where the fuck has that bitch been and what’s she doing?’
Pressing down on my throbbing head, I took off my glove.
Getting revenge for the theft of my thesis was one of my life goals. I had no idea how much longer it would take on my own, but it was something I absolutely couldn’t leave to other people.
Whether it took a hundred days or two hundred, I’d see it through with these two hands.
I pulled my collar closed and returned to the inn where Fran was asleep.
The blackened orders declared to me in blood-red letters:
Current highest-priority assassination target──
──‘Archaeologist Yerna Gracier.’