Chapter 69
Morning has come. Macho Mafia, please wake up.
“Rise and shine.”
─Bolted upright!
I woke before dawn, before the sunlight had even begun to shine. Mornings in another world started this early.
“Nord. Sleep well?”
Fran asked as she brushed her hair in front of the mirror.
She was already fully dressed. Good lord, she’d gotten up before me? Somehow, Fran went to bed later than I did, yet always seemed to wake up earlier.
According to her, she ‘always watches Nord sleep until she dozes off,’ but if I weren’t a good, well-behaved macho man in this new world, Fran would surely be suffering from sleep deprivation.
“I always sleep well. When I sleep with you, Fran.”
I got out of bed and spoke as I stretched. Fran smiled happily at that.
“Hehe. Sometimes you say such lovely things so casually, Nord.”
“Do I? Maybe my overflowing love just slips out.”
After loosening up, I quickly changed clothes.
─Swish.
Fran quietly came over and helped me put on my armor. It bothered me a little, since she acted as if it were only natural for her to do so.
“Fran. I can put it on by myself, too.”
“But it’s faster if I help, isn’t it?”
Fran said as if to ask what the fuss was about. It was pure maternal love. Not because she was a virtuous wife, but because she treated me like a son she was looking after.
They say that when you have a child, the love you gave your husband goes to your kid instead. I wonder if things will change a little when we have one someday.
But when that time came, I felt like the contrast with how things were now would leave me feeling empty and suicidal every day.
─Click.
After getting dressed, we went downstairs and ate. These days, Fran woke me up, so I never missed the free breakfast. A good breakfast really gave you energy for the day.
“Today, we’re finally doing a Bronze-rank promotion quest.”
I said while stirring my stew. It was time to try the promotion test again, after those murderous bandit bastards forced us to put it off.
“After we check the quests, let’s get you a new weapon, Fran, and while we’re at it, let’s each buy a watch.”
“A watch?”
“It’d be convenient to have one. We’ll have to see what the prices are like, though.”
Fran gave me a hesitant look, so I quickly cut her off first.
“I’m paying for the weapon and watches, so don’t say you don’t have money or that you don’t mind.”
“Ugh. How did you know?”
“It’s not the first or second time. Of course I know. Let’s not do this every time we need to buy something.”
“But Nord, you said something when I tried to help you get dressed just now.”
“That’s different.”
I was the one who broke her weapon, and a watch was a necessity. I spoke while counting the pieces of meat in my soup.
“Let’s hurry over after we finish eating, before all the good quests get taken.”
***
We went to the Adventurers’ Guild and checked the promotion-test quests.
1. Goblin extermination in Perfort Village.
2. Carriage escort to Haysvent - Merchant McPhee.
3. Carriage escort to Haysvent - Blacksmiths’ Guild.
4. Carriage escort to Haysvent──
No, shit, why are there so many escort quests? Are they escort quests or fake quests?
“Most of them are escort quests.”
When I asked, dumbfounded, the receptionist answered with the aura of an office worker who’d just arrived at work and already didn’t want to do a damn thing.
“One of the bandit gangs that had been wreaking havoc recently was wiped out. It seems the merchants have become more active while the bandits are holding back in the aftermath.”
Ah. So they’d gotten spooked and calmed down because Tirsi and I found them overnight and wrecked them with a massacre and arson.
Were the merchants hiring Bronze-ranks instead of Iron-ranks so they wouldn’t get screwed after trying to save money? Well, even if it meant less profit, it was better than being stuck with dead stock or getting killed.
“Most of the quests are headed to Haysvent.”
Fran said, standing on tiptoe as she diligently read the quest slips on the counter.
“Nord. How about taking one of the carriage escort quests?”
Fran said that while making eye contact. It was easy to guess what she meant: my thesis.
“Because all the transport guild routes go through Haysvent?”
“Yeah.”
Fran nodded. Unlike me, who’d come by ship, merchants traveled overland. They had to stop for supplies or rest along the way.
In other words, whether I entrusted my thesis in Sargadis or in Haysvent made no difference.
No, wouldn’t the shorter distance at least slightly reduce the risk of it being damaged or lost?
‘Shit. Now that I think about it, this must be why field workers get half a year to submit their theses.’
Wow! Field workers only have to submit one regular report every six months, and that’s it! Isn’t that fucking sweet?
That was what I thought, but it wasn’t sweet at all.
The thesis could run into trouble in transit and get stuck in the Bermuda Okcheon Zone, going from ‘in transit’ to ‘out for delivery’ to ‘Oops! Your package is lost! Ehehe☆’ That was why they gave us six months, accounting for the chance it’d get lost along the way.
At least this was domestic. Field workers stationed abroad might even find half a year too short.
It took about a month just to exchange letters asking whether my thesis had been delivered properly. If delivery failed twice, I’d be fucked, damn it.
The warning letter from academia asking ‘Are you even doing your job?’ would come flying at me full of spite, like the swallow whose leg Nolbu broke.
“An escort quest. That could work, too.”
I said after thinking that far ahead. It was a great choice in terms of reducing the chance my thesis would bail on me halfway through.
Besides, with this many escorted carriages, the bandits wouldn’t dare mess with us. While they were trying to have a decisive battle up front, another carriage and its escort would barge in from behind.
Those bastards who lived by relying on numbers probably wouldn’t risk getting outnumbered. Only real dumbasses would attack a carriage.
‘So this is basically a limited-time seasonal burning event.’
The best jailhouse bean rice in the world is the kind made without beans.
By the same logic, the best extermination quest in the world was one where you didn’t have to exterminate anything. Carriage escorts counted as extermination quests since they came bundled with killing monsters or bandits, but there was a good chance I’d just get paid for nothing.
And I’d get an easy win in an extremely important promotion test, too!
“Fran. Let’s take a carriage escort.”
“Good thinking. What do you want to do for the other one?”
“Huh? We’re choosing both right now?”
The promotion test required two successes out of three attempts. There wasn’t a time limit tight enough that we had to rush, so couldn’t we do the other one later?
“There might not be any carriage escort quests left in a few days. I thought we should pick ones that fit our schedule.”
Fran said, showing me the quest slips. In a few days, the other Bronze-ranks would have swept up all the escort quests, or the clients would cancel them.
There were currently six carriage escort quests registered. If we picked the one leaving soonest and one departing four or five days later, then in theory we could take both carriage escort quests.
My girlfriend had over a month of experience going on quests every day, so she seemed to have a knack for making plans like this.
‘It’s like planning a vacation during peak season.’
It seemed like a good suggestion. I said to the receptionist,
“Can we take both of these quests listed here?”
“You can, but if you don’t show up for a quest, it’ll count as a failure. You may also have to pay a small penalty.”
“Really? Then never mind.”
Fran gave up cleanly after hearing the receptionist’s explanation. When she noticed me looking, Fran giggled.
“There weren’t any quests we could take with at least two days between them. If we were even a day late, I think we’d miss the quest’s departure time.”
“Something unexpected could happen and delay our return. It’s a shame, but we have no choice but to pass.”
“Yeah. So let’s carefully pick the quests we can take.”
Fran’s eyes grew serious, like a mother choosing food for her children. But since she was standing on tiptoe, she just looked cute. Unfortunately.
Flip─ flip─.
Having missed the peak season for escort quests, we looked through the quest slips.
‘There are a few goblin extermination quests, too.’
These green little brats from another world just kept multiplying whenever I took my eyes off them for a second. They were bastards just like mosquitoes.
But in reality, they might be the main source of income for Bronze-ranks.
Goblins were pests to some people, but creatures that helped others make a living. Just like how without pests, CESCO workers wouldn’t exist.
‘More importantly, where the hell is Perfort Village?’
It was the goblin extermination quest that had been left unclaimed the longest.
Perfort, Perfort. I looked up the place name on the map.
‘It’s pretty close from here, isn’t it?’
It was a day’s walk. About the same distance as Haysvent. If I had to compare them, Perfort might be a little farther.
So it must have been passed over. Same one-day distance and similar pay, so everyone had probably gone for the carriage escorts instead. Most of the Bronze-ranks at the Audumla Guild had probably gone to Haysvent, and some of those bastards might not have come back because they were working there.
“Oh.”
At that moment, Fran was startled by the quest slip at the very back.
“Nord. Look at this. It’s an escort quest from the Transport Guild.”
“They are?”
My curiosity was piqued too, so I checked the quest slip. I wondered if the one-armed young man I’d rescued had submitted it, and I was right.
[Two children accompanying (escort targets). One Silver-class escort present.]
[Hiring: 4 Bronze-class adventurers. Pay: 30 copper.]
That was about it for the special conditions on the quest slip.
They had a Silver-class adventurer, were hiring as many as four Bronzes, and even the pay was high.
“Looks pretty good, doesn’t it?”
“Right?”
Fran and I were of one mind.
A group that failed once would prepare thoroughly for the same task to prevent a second failure. Some groups didn’t, but the one-armed young man from the Transport Guild seemed intent on being prepared.
It said ‘children accompanying,’ so that was surely the reason. He wanted to bring the kids who’d been kidnapped by the bandits safely home.
“They even hired a Silver-class adventurer for the trip to Haysvent. Are they trying to make up for their mistake by making sure this transport succeeds?”
Fran said. Looking at the date it had been posted, the quest had only come in today. And yet two people had already accepted it.
If we missed this one now, we’d never get another chance to take it. The conditions were so good that someone else would snatch it up.
“Ahem.”
A middle-aged adventurer standing in line behind us cleared his throat. His expression said, Hurry up and move along. We were taking our sweet time at the reception desk.
Shit, we’d been inconveniencing people without realizing it. We’d better pick quickly and move.
“Fran. Let’s take this one. And I was thinking of taking another quest, too. How about this?”
“Which one?”
I picked up the goblin extermination quest submitted by the people of Perfort Village. Fran read the conditions and nodded.
“Twenty copper in pay for a two-day round trip. That should be fine.”
“The Transport Guild’s carriage leaves in four days, so if it’s a two-day trip, even if something happens and we’re delayed by a day, we should be fine. Are you okay with this quest too, Fran?”
“Yeah. If you’re happy with it, Nord, I’m happy with anything.”
“Aww. Our Fran is so damn sweet.”
─Smooch!
I hugged Fran, who’d said something so lovely, and kissed her on the cheek. Fran blushed and looked shy. The middle-aged adventurer waiting behind us had a face like shit.
What? Jealous? If you’re that jealous, why don’t you become an adventurer with your wife, then?
The Nord Constitution says couples have a duty to show affection in public.
And so we accepted and registered for two quests.
***
After taking care of things at the guild, we went to Clara’s smithy. We’d come to get a new weapon for Fran to replace the one I’d broken.
“Welcome!”
Clara, who’d been slumped over the counter looking miserable, sprang up and greeted us. Was business still that bad?
“Oh! You’re the adventurer who came by last time! Have you been well?”
“I’ve been well. I bought some equipment here, and then I got a girlfriend. So I came back today, hoping for another good thing to happen.”
“That’s wonderful news to hear! What are you looking for today?!”
“Well, here, my girlfriend needs a weapon to use──”
“You’re a dwarf! Just a moment! I have a great weapon for you!!”
─Crash, clatter!!
Before I could finish speaking, Clara hurried into the smithy to fetch some weapons. She seemed desperate not to let a customer slip away, especially after such a long stretch without one.
Fran watched her and spoke with concern.
“Is business going badly for her?”