Story

I wondered if it was really okay to click on this, but the chat didn't seem to be reacting badly.

Just in case, I asked one more time.

“Has anyone read this? Is it okay to put it on stream?”

-1111

-Hands

-Yeah

-It's just a clickbait title, you're good

-Go go

Fortunately, everyone said it was fine. Then I'll trust you and read… No, I won't.

I'd sooner believe that our lady will start cooking normally tomorrow.

What do you mean, why? It means I don't believe a damn thing they say.

-Poor Ms. Haeun, suffering again today

-At least pay her an appearance fee

-For real lol

I asked them to bear with me for a moment, turned off the screen, and clicked on the post. There were no strange pictures, and after skimming the contents, it didn't seem like there was any major problem.

“Let's read it now. Surely it'd be better if I read it to you, right?”

-Isn't that obvious?

-Why is someone who claims to be a cooking streamer trying to get by without doing any work?

People have to eat raw sometimes. Eating raw food once in a while is good for you.

“Yes, yes. Then I'll read it. The username is... TerranNerfPlease.”

『Hello, Jian. I'm an ordinary viewer.

Before explaining the meaning of the title, I think you need some background knowledge about my work, so I'll explain.

I can't tell you the exact industry, but usually, a team consists of eight people, or ten at most.

There is always one team leader, with the rest being ordinary team members. The members are assigned randomly, so they might be people you're meeting for the first time or people you've seen before.

That's why, without even introducing ourselves, we simply call one another Red, Blue, and so on, in the order we entered.』

“Hold on. A workplace like this actually exists? Do you work for some foundation from an internet horror story? That's incredibly suspicious.”

-Gasp

-Jian doesn't make bad choices. Jian isn't depressed. Jian is happy. Jian doesn't quit streaming.

-You've opened your eyes. Come to the wiki.

“I'll keep reading.”

『Anyway, I went to work as usual and joined an eight-person team.

Unlike what I expected—that I'd be doing the same work as always—the task I was assigned this time was something completely new, something I'd never experienced before.

It was my fault for signing up for the task without properly reading it.

I panicked and stammered, and a disaster unfolded in which I couldn't perform my role properly.

Then the other team members started by saying they wanted to kill White's mother—White was my color, by the way—and continued hurling things at me that were too vile to repeat, saying they would make jeotgal out of my mother and so on.』

“No, fuck. That's way too far. It's not like lives were on the line—you're resorting to mom jokes over one mistake?”

I hadn't realized it because I'd only skimmed the post before, but reading it properly seemed to trigger my past-life PTSD, and I became completely emotionally invested.

“This isn't right. Author, you're watching the stream right now, aren't you? Quit that job immediately.”

-Who'll earn money if they quit?

-Why are they so invested lol

-Wls

-This means Jian just confessed they'd support me, right?

-What?

-Why only you? Why only you? Why only you?

They spouted more nonsense in the middle of a serious conversation. Still, thanks to them, I came back to my senses.

『Under the pressure of the constant insults and verbal abuse, my hands began trembling violently. The more they trembled, the more mistakes I made, and the cycle of being cursed at all over again continued.

In conclusion, yesterday my mother died about thirteen times in five minutes, was turned into jeotgal twice, and became another man's wife about four times.

I need Jian's homemade cooking to forget these miserable feelings. Please.』

“Wow. This is really...”

I couldn't bring myself to continue. This person seemed to have gone through something even worse than I had.

“Of course I should give you some. You have the most recommendations, too, and if there's another opportunity like this later, I'll make sure to remember you then as well.”

It was a truly sad story.

I had to take care of this person. If I didn't, who would I take care of?

Even the 'That's legit' association guys would approve of this story.

Look. Even the chat...

-?

-You're selling your mother? Take some losses for once.

-Stop bullshitting, stop bullshitting

-Way too invested

-Lol, hey, hey, read the postscript.

A postscript? There was more?

Looking again, I saw that the scroll continued quite a long way down.

I scrolled all the way down and found the following.

『 ps1. For reference, the place I work is the War of the Stars.

ps2. Keeping eight people quiet is fucking hard, damn it.』

For a moment, I couldn't understand. My brain stopped processing, then the realization hit me.

Each word began circling around in my head.

Random teammates. Eight people. Colors. Missions. The War of the Stars. Keeping mouths shut.

Bang, bang, bang.

“This is about a game!”

[ㅇㅇ donated 1,000 won!]

Breaking news, breaking news, fucking breaking news! Earthquake detected! The epicenter is at five o'clock!

-ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

-Did you really fall for it lol?

-Your IQ is fucking destroyed

-The national pastime is legit; since we're talking about it, wanna play a game?

-They're gullible too.

-Pushing through the campaign is trendy these days, I guess.

The title had seemed familiar too, but when I thought about it, it was a line from a famous novel, and the username had been blatantly related to the game.

When I calmly read it again, it seemed like they hadn't even intended to deceive me in the first place.

No one had tricked me, but I felt like the only person who'd been fooled.

Annoying.

I wanted to vent my anger, but I held it in, worried that I'd only look even more pathetic.

“That was some acting, huh? Excellent bait. The story wasn't very good, but as promised, it had lots of recommendations, so I won't argue any further.”

-That acting lol

-It wasn't very good lol

-Okotta? Okotta? Okotta?

Ignoring the chat's teasing, I clicked on the next post. Please.

Please. Let this one be normal.

Jian, how about donating to orphans?

The title passed, at least.

Something about it seemed strange, but I figured it was probably just a typo and began reading.

『Recently, a child began wandering around the place I frequent.

At first I ignored the child, but the child started screaming and causing a commotion, so I figured they were sick. But at some point, whenever I saw them, they had started going around defecating everywhere.』

“That person sounds seriously ill, but did you try contacting the police?”

These days, the world is frightening, so I couldn't tell the writer to offer direct help. Still, wouldn't it be better to at least report it?

『So I watched carefully a few times and—oh, good grief. It turned out this poor friend was holding a family meeting all by himself. The evidence is below.』

Evidence? Evidence? The wording was strange. Sure enough, the uploaded pictures were internet memes. Wondering what they were, I looked at them.

(a meme of HaeunLoveDog cursing)

(a meme of the same IP cursing)

A familiar username.

“Wow. This bastard still hasn't come to his senses.”

-ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋThat bastard

-Hardcore, so hardcore

-This is true love.

I read the rest as well.

(a meme of him cursing while asking and answering himself)

『Look at this! He was so lonely that he ended up splitting his own personality!

How about a delicious plate of food for this poor orphan friend, HaeunLoveDog?』

What he does is definitely... ahem. He does look a little slow, though.

-What? What are you saying?

-Jian-gay, you couldn't hold it in, huh?

“Ahem. I didn't say anything. Author, be careful—you could get sued. I can't help you at all.”

You have to protect your own life. No matter how much you want cookies, getting a criminal record would be a little much, wouldn't it?

Before leaving the post, I quietly upvoted it.

Well, it was fun. Cheers.

***

I read several more stories after that.

They were all written entertainingly and skillfully. I regretted not making more cookies.

Still, a promise was a promise, so there was nothing I could do. Those who narrowly missed out should try their luck next time.

“We've read all the stories, and there's one important thing left, right?”

-The cookies are hereeeeeeeeeee

-They're mine already lol

-Shiiiiit, should we just take them all and dump them somewhere?

Dump them? What a waste.

I moved all the baked cookies where the camera could see them clearly.

Twelve each of the original, chocolate, and matcha flavors: thirty-six cookies in total. Three per person, for ten people.

-Three each?

-Hmm...

-Mom, the soup is salty.

“It might look like only three, but... ah, hold on a moment.”

I picked up a cookie and compared its size to my palm.

“As you can see, it's bigger than my palm, right? Just by calories, one of these is probably 1,000 calories.”

When I broke the cookie in half, the chocolate hadn't fully set yet, so it flowed out in a sticky stream.

-Now that's sex

-Look at that chocolate flowing

-That looks fuuuuucking delicious

-What about my cookie? What about my cookie? What about my cookie?

“I like lots of toppings whenever I eat something. So, as you can see, the amount of chocolate alone is about the same as the amount of flour.”

After explaining the ingredients, I took a bite of the cookie.

The cookie still had some heat left in it, so it crumbled the moment I put it in my mouth.

The rich, sweet taste of the melted chocolate coated my mouth, while the nuts crunched between my teeth and added a savory nuttiness.

The buttery flavor was a bonus.

“One bite is enough to recharge all the sugar you need for the day.”

At this quality, even 5,000 won apiece at a café would feel cheap. Of course, someone would still say, “For that money, I could get...”

“For reference, one set is left, so I'll draw one person from among those currently in the chat.”

-Seriously?;;

-Get lost, that's mine.

-It's already mine, so fuck off.

-But isn't it two sets?

The one left over is the one I took a bite of. How could I give you that?

-That's the good one, though. What a shame.

-For real lol

-That's the first-place prize.

The viewers were joking around again. It was a joke, right?

If they were serious, I thought I'd lose all respect for them.

A look of instinctive contempt appeared on my face. I was glad they couldn't see my expression, but even if they had, I probably would've just gone, “Oh wow,” and pulled this kind of shit anyway.

“Yes. Well. Your tastes are consistently shitty, aren't they? Anyway, I'll draw one more set, and the winners should email me the shipping address and a screenshot proving their ID. I'll send them out tomorrow.”

Amid the viewers' enthusiastic cheers, I safely drew the final winner, and today's stream came to an end.

Before that.

“If I catch you eating them and disappearing, you're dead, okay? You don't need to post a heartfelt review, but at least leave a review of how they tasted.”

-What a shame

-Lol, I'll try my best

I knew it, you damn bastards.