Chapter 14
I returned to the Association for the first time in two days.
As I waited in the lobby, browsing Tower Gallery, a familiar red-haired woman soon approached from the distance.
Familiar dark circles and ample caffeine pouches.
But for some reason, she looked a little different. After staring up at her for a long while, I muttered as if my world had just collapsed.
"The chicken coop... it's gone...?"
"You little punk. That's the first thing you say when you see me?"
Thwack!
She immediately tapped me on the crown with the tablet she was holding.
Still looking incredulous, I continued speaking to Hong Yeon-hwa.
"No... My Carbon noona wouldn't be like this..."
"What exactly is the problem? And shouldn't I be 'unnie,' not 'noona'?"
Hong Yeon-hwa asked, sounding like she couldn't understand my continued nonsense.
From her perspective, it was understandable that she'd be baffled.
She'd just been told her identity was being denied by a kid she'd met two days ago.
But I couldn't help it either.
Because...
"You aren't wearing glasses..."
Hong Yeon-hwa wasn't wearing her glasses.
And her hair was down instead of hastily tied up.
Sway.
When those features combined with those ridiculously huge caffeine pouches, she gave off the aggressive aura of an office lady's femininity.
In fact, the male Association staff in the lobby kept sneaking glances at Hong Yeon-hwa whenever she passed by.
Even though she was their boss, they couldn't help staring at a pretty woman.
For some reason, I felt like I was losing.
Like she kept making me feel deprived...
Meanwhile, Hong Yeon-hwa looked at my tattered clothes and asked curiously.
"Why are your clothes like that?"
"These? A little something in the Tower... Haha."
"...Well, with that difficulty setting, I guess. What about your other clothes?"
"I don't have any."
"What?"
At my saying I had no other clothes, Hong Yeon-hwa immediately looked me up and down and muttered to herself.
"Should I buy you some clothes later...?"
"......"
For some reason, that sounded dangerous.
So I quickly cut off her muttering and changed the subject.
"Th-that reminds me, you cleared Floor 20, right...?"
"Oh, right, right. That's why I called you here, wasn't it?"
After glancing around briefly, Hong Yeon-hwa awkwardly scratched her cheek and thanked me.
"F-first... um... th-thank you..."
Was she embarrassed to thank me?
A blush rose on Hong Yeon-hwa's usually haughty-looking face.
Seeing that, I got mischievous, put on a sly smile, and teased her.
"For what? What are you thanking me for?"
"Th-that... the candy. I only managed to clear Floor 20 because of it..."
"Hee~ Is that so~"
"......"
Hong Yeon-hwa's face grew redder and redder as I kept teasing her.
She was so red that I could barely distinguish the color of her flushed ears from her hair.
In the end, unable to bear the embarrassment, Hong Yeon-hwa fumbled inside her clothes, pulled out a small box, and thrust it at me.
"...Here."
"What is this?"
"A thank-you gift."
"Hehe... Tsundere heroines like that don't sell these days, you know?"
"Shut up and just take it!"
"Okay."
She looked ready to start blasting magic if I teased her any more, so I reluctantly accepted the box she handed over.
Rattle!
When I opened it, the box contained ten small glass vials.
They were about the same size as those little rock-candy jars sold at stationery stores.
But instead of rock candy, they held sloshing liquid.
Five bottles each of red and blue liquid.
I couldn't resist making a joke when I saw them.
"These are political colors..."
"They're not!!"
"No wonder you're a civil servant. You filled them exactly half and half."
"Haa... What am I supposed to do with this cheeky little brat...?"
Of course, I was joking.
There was no government inside the Tower at present.
Given that it was an anarchic state, I suppose you could say I was immune to political jokes.
Even the Association, the closest thing to a public authority, didn't have much power to enforce its will.
Hong Yeon-hwa sighed and explained what was in the bottles.
"They may not look like much, but those are the..."
"I know. Potions, right?"
"...What? You know?"
Of course I do. I'm an alchemist.
They look so much like potions, it'd be weird if I didn't recognize them.
Flash─!!
[ Lesser Health Potion ]
- Rank: D
- Details: A drug that uses GHRP, which promotes growth hormone secretion, to regenerate wounds. Has a mild analgesic effect.
[ Lesser Mana Potion ]
- Rank: D
- Details: A psychoactive drug that stimulates the central nervous system to increase mana absorption. Upon consumption, induces a mild state of wakefulness. Comes with a mild risk of dependence.
In fact, the item information for the two potions was visible before my eyes.
As befitting lesser potions, their effects weren't all that dramatic, but they seemed like they'd be moderately useful to have.
'Wait, but...'
The first one's fine, but isn't the second one a drug?
How is a mana potion a psychoactive drug...?
I shouldn't have made fun of the elves for smoking weed.
The Association bastards were junkies themselves.
'Can other people not see these status windows?'
Probably not.
If they could, people would already be discussing it on Awakened Gallery.
It seemed there was some trait that let you see the ingredients in drugs.
For example, an EX-rank one like Drug Addiction.
As I was thinking to myself about traits, Hong Yeon-hwa continued.
"Even if they don't look like much, those are hard to come by these days. The guilds won't release their stock, so I even cleaned out the Association's reserves to get them."
"...Isn't that embezzlement?"
"Ahem. It's not embezzlement, it's 'relocation.'"
"That's the same thing..."
Boo~ Abuse of power~
Impeach Hong Yeon-hwa from the Association~
...Well, even if it was embezzlement, it wouldn't have been all that surprising.
Considering all the crimes that had happened in the Tower so far, embezzlement was a cute prank on par with 'relocation.'
Besides, Hong Yeon-hwa wasn't some low-level employee.
She was a high-ranking executive, so she must've handled it properly.
"Oh, and one more thing."
"......?"
But were the potions she'd just given me not the end of it?
Before I even had a chance to put the box I'd received into my Inventory, Hong Yeon-hwa rummaged in her pocket again and held out a small metal ring.
"Here."
"What is this?"
"An artifact."
"...Huh??"
Isn't that insanely expensive...?
I thought even C-rank ones started at hundreds of millions...?
Artifacts.
To put it simply, they're items that let you use skills or traits.
The difference from ordinary items is that they aren't disposable.
And they usually take the form of weapons, armor, accessories, and so on.
What Hong Yeon-hwa offered me was a ring-type artifact, the most expensive kind of all.
[ Magic Stock Ring ]
- Rank: A
- Ability: Uses mana to store one spell in the ring and cast it. It will be destroyed if used to cast a spell of a higher rank than the ring.
- Stored Skill (1/1): [ Inferno (S) ]
"Inferno...?"
For some reason, the name made me think of firefighters putting out fires with fire.
But judging from its S rank, it was clearly no ordinary skill.
"Oh, well, it's..."
In response to my puzzled reaction, Hong Yeon-hwa's eyes lit up like an otaku's as she began explaining the skill.
"Heh heh... Inferno is a Seventh-Circle explosive spell. Unlike the existing Diverge method, which uses an ignition formula, it limits the range with a Converge formula using a Vortex circuit to maximize its power. Its explosive force is 170,000 kilobursts, and its maximum core temperature is about 100 million kelvins. When detonated, it incinerates all matter within a ten-meter radius into ash, making it the undisputed strongest destructive spell..."
"......"
Uwee... dyoo-dya...
I don't get it...
Magic is hard...
'...What the hell is she saying?'
The explanation was so boring and pretentious, even harder to understand than Speed Vegan's posts, that I felt my brain melting.
When I just blinked at her with an expression that showed I hadn't understood, Hong Yeon-hwa thought for a moment and continued in simpler terms.
"...Just think of it as a thermobaric bomb."
"Ooh...!! A thermobaric bomb...!!"
For some reason, the words seemed to stir a man's soul.
"When you cast it, everything within a ten-meter radius evaporates... so use it from far away."
So it goes whooosh~ then boom!!
Okay, I understand perfectly.
"Hehe."
Excited by the thought of using an explosive spell with the click of a button, I put on a satisfied smile and placed the ring and potion box Hong Yeon-hwa had given me into my Inventory.
Watching me, Hong Yeon-hwa asked with an anxious expression.
"You did understand, right...?"
"Of course."
"You really understood, right...?"
"I just have to shoot it from far away, right?"
"...Fine. You're a Lunatic climber, after all. I'm sure you'll handle it."
"Excuse me??"
I asked back, bristling at her vaguely sarcastic tone, but Hong Yeon-hwa pretended not to hear and quickly changed the subject.
"Anyway, have you ever thought of officially registering with the Association?"
"With the Association?"
"Yeah. You're a Lunatic climber, right? We'd treat you well if you joined."
"...I dunno."
A sudden offer to register officially.
But it wasn't all that tempting.
No, I'd thought about it too, you know?
Joining somewhere like the Association or a guild.
If I revealed that I was a Lunatic climber, all kinds of organizations would be desperate to recruit me.
Once I joined, I'd get plenty of support and just have to keep climbing the Tower.
Of the options, the Association wasn't a bad one.
For one thing, it had more authority than the other guilds, since it was practically a public authority.
The Association was also probably the cleanest organization in the Tower.
But...
'There's no way the Association would let me take drugs... right?'
In fact, since it played the role of a semi-public authority, it was one of the organizations I absolutely shouldn't join.
My trait was basically that of a drug offender. How could I join the Association?
...Though looking at the ingredients in their potions, I wasn't so sure.
Still, you never know, right?
I might be treated like a test subject, like the rumors on Tower Gallery suggested.
"...So you don't plan on joining."
"Hehe... Sorry."
I felt bad for Hong Yeon-hwa, but for the time being, I planned to keep soloing.
I didn't really have any problems soloing for now, either.
"Still, I'll keep giving you candy."
As I said that, I took out the candy I'd prepared in advance from my Inventory and held it out to Hong Yeon-hwa.
This time, I was being generous and giving her ten.
That's the equivalent of a hundred cans of energy drinks.
Of course, I'd made it with instant coffee mix powder, not energy drinks.
[ Caffeine Candy ]
- Rank: C
- Details: A candy containing the caffeine from 20 packets of commercial instant coffee mix (about 1,000 mg) compressed into a single piece. It stimulates the central nervous system, temporarily inducing an alert state.
Candy made with the instant coffee mix left over from my convenience-store shopping.
Maybe that's why it was dark brown instead of yellow.
After receiving the candy, Hong Yeon-hwa looked at it suspiciously for a moment.
"......"
Crunch!
"...Oh, coffee flavor."
Maybe it was better than she'd expected once she tried it.
Her face brightened at once, and she put the candy she'd received into her pocket.
"This tastes better than the old one."
"Really? I liked the old one better."
"That's because you don't know coffee. You don't know how sweet coffee tastes after working overtime for three nights straight..."
"...Young Forty, stop."
Then Hong Yeon-hwa thoroughly chewed me out.
Why am I a Young Forty...
I am old, though...
*
*
*
After finishing what I had to do at the Association, I returned home.
I immediately opened Tower Gallery and started catching up on the top posts I'd missed.
[ These Baekhwa Guild bastards are dead set on getting themselves fucked ]
[ Wiping the floor with Floor 20 using fire magic, lmao ]
[ The test of a bastard ]
[ Predicted comment: The best, firepower firepower ]
[ Are you browsing the Gallery after seeing Carbon's red pill?? ]
[ So who'd win in a fight, Carbon and 397?? ]
[ Anyone willing to give me 20 million...(sad story inside...) ]
[ ...... ]
[ ... ]
"Still the same as ever."
The top posts were plastered with the guild rumors from last time and the buzz about Hong Yeon-hwa clearing Floor 20.
I clicked on the most attention-grabbing title among them to check the post.
[ So who'd win in a fight, Carbon and 397?? ]
"Gasp..."
The usual versus bait you saw on Awakened Gallery.
The sort of childish argument where people debated, 'Who would win, Mihawk or Shanks?'
But it was the best topic for stimulating dopamine.
And if one of the people involved was me, there was no way I could resist the title.
I immediately checked the post.
[ So who'd win in a fight, Carbon and 397?? ]
[ Posted by: Anonymous Climber ]
397 wins easily, right??
- Anonymous Climber: What the hell are you saying...
- Anonymous Climber: Obviously Carbon would win easily, right?
- Speed Vegan: Is there even any point discussing this;;;
└ Speed Vegan: Carbon's only A-rank, but judging by her skill set, she's basically a quasi-S-rank;;
└ Anonymous Climber: But what if she uses the power of 'Lunatic'...!!
└ Speed Vegan: ;;;;;;;;;;;;
- Anonymous Climber: Do you think Hong Yeon-hwa-nim, the Association's A-rank Awakened, is a joke???
└ Anonymous Climber: Hey, hey
└ If a Cow Burns, Carbon: ^^
└ Scarlet Letter*: Mentioning red pills is bannable...
- Great Hero: If 397 gets behind her with Flash Step and goes shwish! shwish! wouldn't she get a critical hit and win easily??
└ Anonymous Climber: Reality isn't a Soulslike game...
└ Save the Newbies: You can't ignore the floor difference
└ Anonymous Climber: Even if it's Lunatic, it's Floor 3, while she's on Floor 20 Insane;;
- Anonymous Climber: How can you compare her to someone who's only cleared Floor 3?ㅋㅋㅋㅋ
└ Great Mage: Compare? Ooh...
└ Anonymous Climber: Until the polar bears go extinct...
└ Saintess: Please, everyone, just die already;;;
└ If a Cow Burns, Carbon: For real
"...Hmm."
There were a few strange comments and Carbon noona butting in with her unsolicited opinions, but most people were taking Hong Yeon-hwa's side.
Well, Hong Yeon-hwa was a veteran Awakened who'd already climbed to Floor 20.
And the difficulty was Insane, one step below Lunatic.
No matter how you looked at it, it was obvious I couldn't beat her right now, even if she was only A-rank.
If they were taking bets, even 87-year-old Grandpa Park Chan-su would pick Hong Yeon-hwa as the favorite.
"......"
But even so, was it just me, or did it feel like I'd lost something?
Who am I?
Korea's fourth Lunatic climber.
The owner of the EX-rank trait Drug Addiction, Geum A-yeon.
My pride couldn't accept losing a flame war to an A-rank Awakened.
Besides, she's two ranks below me.
Technically, I'm her senior, and Hong Yeon-hwa's my junior, aren't I?
She should be the one using honorifics with me, not the other way around...
Losing a flame war? Could that really be happening?
"I won't accept it."
If I thought about it, it was perfectly reasonable to accept, but apparently my feelings wouldn't let me.
In the end, I closed Tower Gallery, grabbed the equipment Hong Yeon-hwa had given me, and headed out.
"I'll climb in one go."
Floor 4.
It was about time to head up to the next floor.